It is Sad

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anthrosub -> It is Sad (7/1/2004 9:56:23 PM)
i'm sorry but i had to say something here because i really like Collarme and have a lot of respect for the efforts and genuine spirit i've found. i just signed on a few minutes ago and found a rather attractive Pro Domme's profile photo at the top of the most recently online listings. i was impressed...until i read the journal entry where she dumps on those who may not be as attractive as she is. It's beyond me why a remark like that need be posted. Perhaps she is insecure...who knows. i'm not trying to stir up trouble; it just bothers me to see such things. On the other hand (now that i've written this) perhaps it's a good thing...for she is telling everyone the kind of person she is. Still...it is sad. anthrosub

sarbonn -> RE: It is Sad (7/1/2004 10:03:23 PM)
I just ignore the negative people. They're not worth the effort.

MistressDREAD -> RE: It is Sad (7/1/2004 10:36:35 PM)
anthrosub and sarbon FYI in Alternate Lifestyles there is such a thing as Humiliation that both Dominant and submissives enjoy either giving or recieving. It is not any more sadder then sumone whom enjoys a good paddling or kissing sumones stinkie feet. And you are right anthro She IS telling all those out here in Alternate World what She is like and enjoys giving. I also post the either negitive things or absolutly hilarious things that subbies say to Me on My profile as well. It is the place for All of us to post what We like or dont like about sumone We have had contact with or to tell about Our selfs.

LearningSlave -> RE: It is Sad (7/1/2004 11:54:59 PM)
valid point mistressDread i would counter with. Humliation should not be used lightly. It can be a effective tool for sure but to have it fomr the start i think is misuse. For one its most effective when teh domme and sub know each other. Has more of a impact. For another randomaly insulting people even subs. I dont know not my cup of tea i think thats rude frankly . Dont get me worn humlitation play can be a great elemente in a storng realtionship. It can take a sub to places he has never been to. It can also make a sub truly hate himself and be abuse.

iwillserveu -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 3:07:50 AM)
Unless I'm mistaken humiliation should get consent. One can argue to view the journal entry one hsad to scroll in that little window or view her profile so scrolling indicated consent, but... Anthrosub, so you know know more about her. Should she lie? (Even just a lie of "omission".) What is her alternative other than changing who she is to suit someone she hasn't met? BTW, you need to specify that the pro Domme was not ProDomme. ProDomme is a nice lady. (Well, nice in that horrible way we subs love.[:D])

italianalala -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 3:40:33 AM)
Anthro: We humans are wonderful, we need to tell the truth, yup, we need to. She described herself truthfully and it was offensive to you. Good! You read with your intellect and intuitive radar scanning her words. It's not pleasant to sense the negative undercurrents in a person. We love to believe, at least I do, in the basic decency, well, except for the present squatters in the Oval Office, of our fellow souls. This alternative lifestyle demands introspection. Kudos for the ones who are sad and alive. itty ----------------------- Blueberries are in season. 99 cents a pint.

UtahGoddess -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 4:56:41 AM)
I find it ironic that you admit you viewed her profile because she was attractive. You even admit you were "impressed" with what she had to say up until she started "dumping" on the less attractive. I find it quite amusing that she obviously met YOUR standards of Misstress appearance, yet she was rejected for having standards of her own. (Am I the only one that sees this outpoint?) I have not seen the profle in question, so I have no inside information. But the reality is we all have preferences about physical characteristics we find attractive or not. We are entitled to them. Some people are more flexible than others in their willingness to "see beyond" their preferences....but we all have them. Next....I am reminded of a quote I heard many years ago: "Have you ever noticed...when you toss a pebble into a crowd, the only people that yell...are those that got hit?" unknown Ms Sandi

MistressDREAD -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 5:28:03 AM)
actuallllllly this is a ALTERNATE LIFESTYLE and to Me the expectation that I am going to be this nice sweet act like a vanilla type person apon meeting Me is is totally NOT REALITY. I am a Bitch from the get go and anyone whom thinks they desire Me treating them nice just because I just met em is not living in My world. You hit the nail on the head italianalala and I always believe that Honesty of Self is the very best way to go even if there are sum out there whom dont like who You are, The Good The Bad and The Ugly. And iwill for Me humiliation for Me is a given. Its the being nice sumone has to get My permission for Me to be as its one of My Limits. LOL get My drift?? None of Us know each other here hypothically learning hence none know what are Others Likes or dislikes but to rag on sumone whom is honest and upfront about who They are here in a Alternate Forum is simply vanity at its worse of the one whom feels that We all should be candy coated at the onset. I know I Will NOT be. Im a Sadist and any one will know this fact apon Meeting Me in the real world Lifestyler or Vanilla. [My kink is not Your kink but My kink is just as valuable as You kink.] I have no shortage of those whom seek out My kurt Humiliating attitude.

anthrosub -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 3:01:57 PM)
Wow! i must say some of the responses to this thread have been a real surprise. As i stated in my original post, it was not meant to stir up trouble. As far as what went down...well, i signed on and there was this picture of the most recent Domme that had been online with a photo in her profile. When i said i was impressed...i meant i found her to be visually attractive. Before i read her profile, i started reading the journal entry which was visible right next to the photo. You know the rest. Saying i viewed her profile because i found her attractive and met my standards is not exactly what happened. i had no choice in seeing the picture when the site page opened and after reading the journal entry, i didn't open the profile at all. But what intrigues me most from some of what's been said is the apparent "defense" of this person. Yes, it takes all kinds....yes, we all have our bubble popped from time to time in spite of wishful thinking...yes, everyone has a right to express themselves...and so on. i'm further amazed about my pointing out what i read and then getting all sorts of attention focusing on what "my" preferences are. Yes, we all have our preferences whether we've worked through them or not. It seems to me the people who are the most flexible about this issue are the people who are outside the proverbial "norm" to begin with. But i will quickly qualify this last statement by saying i'm fully aware there are always exceptions, so no one has to write me and say, "I read your post and think I'm attractive but don't put a lot of stock in what others look like." For the record, my preferences are pretty much middle of the road. If i meet someone who's stereotypically attractive...great but i'm not expecting or looking for that any more than i'm looking for someone who's stereotypically unattractive. i'm looking for someone who's attractive...to me...and i will know what that is when i meet her. anthrosub

Voltare -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 4:07:14 PM)
I think the mistake being made is confusing 'humiliation' with 'bad manners.' I don't go out to dinner with a woman who chews with her mouth open and talks with her mouth full. Someone who smacks the back of my head and demands the time of day can expect to get told what time it is in hell. Just because they are entitled to be a bitch, doesn't mean they are entitled to even a second of my consideration, beyond a measure of pity that they live in such a hateful, miserable world. Essentially, I don't consent to humilitation by virtue of being on a public street, or website. On the other hand, I enjoy having a front row seat for when others humiliate themselves by assuming they have more power, value, or beauty then anyone else. Stephan

MistressDREAD -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 5:41:20 PM)
hahahah yes Voltare but My poiint here was that he is no better then that which he complains about dont You think?? Id say he was passin a big heap of humiliating Her way thru Us here as well. [Opens My mouth up at Voltare with a mint on My tongue] ahhhhhhhh![:'(]

iwillserveu -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 5:51:19 PM)
Good point, UtahGoddess.

anthrosub -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 6:24:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: iwillserveu Good point, UtahGoddess. iwillserveu... Which one? Mistress Dread... You've certainly posted enough times on this site to realize what people write is open to interpretation. i responded with clarification as to why i started this thread. i'm starting to get the impression that messages on this site should be confined to the neutral and bland, else risk being chastized for things not intended or sentenced to an endless stream of "This is what i meant..." replies. i attempted to stand up for some common courtesy on this site and instead became the focus of that which i was pointing out. If there's any irony here...it's that. anthrosub

January -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 7:42:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: anthrosub i'm starting to get the impression that messages on this site should be confined to the neutral and bland, else risk being chastized for things not intended or sentenced to an endless stream of "This is what i meant..." replies. anthro, First: IMO your original post came off condescending and judgemental toward the domme. "So sad," is what you said. So since we didn't see her profile we have a hard time really commenting on her. Just on you and your reaction. That's why people harped on you. How about next time posting bits of the offensive profile and asking what the assembled board participants think? Most likely they'd laugh at her arrogance. It's okay to invite opinion before you share yours! Second: I've never seen the board flame people for outrageous opinions. (And you're telling DREAD only the bland survive? Now that's funny!) But they do often flame for closed-mindedness and intolerance. Hot-headed judgmentalism is second cousin to intolerance. That's what I saw in your first post. Third: You don't ever need to post "this is what I meant" missives. It is sometimes more honorable just to chill--even if people misunderstand. (No need to slam the door or say you're done, either). When you take a defensive tone trying to explain yourself... which IMO you did, (dissing us as being both discourteous and bland), you dig yourself into a deeper hole. Fourth: This is true, and not opinion. Really. Threads take a life of their own. Even if you gave birth to the first post, you don't ever own the thread again. The thread crawls off to be nurtured, warped, seduced or molested by the community. If you send off your baby knowing that, you'll be less frustrated when it grows up to be lawyer instead of a doctor. So yeah. You may start a discussion on arrogant and beautiful dommes, but the thread will twist into a discussion lawyers and doctors... January

anthrosub -> RE: It is Sad (7/2/2004 8:08:32 PM)
January... Thanks for your thoughts. As i read, i had two streams of thought going through my head. One was something like, "Yes, what's being pointed out certainly does happen." and the second was, "Ok, i can see where each respondent is reacting to their own take on different parts of what i first wrote." Put it all together and i ended up with a mess on my hands. Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder...meaning is in the mind of the reader. In the meantime, it's late and i'm going on a trip for the weekend. Have a nice Fourth everyone. anthrosub

italianalala -> RE: It is Sad (7/3/2004 10:50:48 AM)
Anthro, anthro, anthro, This is a discussion board and we are responding to another person's view with our opinions. I would become petrified if we agreed on all issues. Consider this, you do not like people to disagree with you. Read the post I'm responding to, the last para. Pretend I wrote it, what is your impression of me based on your remarks? Anthro, as an Italian all I can say is, eeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, ragazzino. Ma'am

anthrosub -> RE: It is Sad (7/5/2004 3:04:14 PM)
i just returned from my holiday trip and i'm glad to be home again. i hope everyone else had a good weekend as well. Italianalala... i understood what You wrote. When i start a thread or reply to one, what i say gets read by many others and of course, those who wish to reply will add their own opinion. So far...so good. Next, i read the replies and from what's written, i can tell that whatever i was trying to convey has often (often...not always) been overlooked, misinterpreted, or they simply want to add whatever my post has inspired them to say. Case in point...You claim from reading my posts that i don't like people disagreeing with me. Sorry...that's wrong. What i'm frustrated by is what i just described above and when i say frustrated, that doesn't mean i don't like it. Not liking something and being frustrated by it are two separate reactions. All i intended by starting this thread was to say i saw something that appeared rude and thought it wasn't very nice. That's all...nothing else. From there, it's been suggested i was trying to humiliate the person in question and that i'm some sort of hypocrite for pointing it out in the first place. To me, these are interpretations of what i wrote and January was very good to describe how these threads can take on a life of their own so to speak. People will think what they want and i can only attempt to remain true to myself in the process. Thank You for Your thoughts. anthrosub

iwillserveu -> RE: It is Sad (7/5/2004 5:12:29 PM)
The part about you being impressed because of her picture and being upset she uses that same standard.

anthrosub -> RE: It is Sad (7/5/2004 5:47:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: iwillserveu The part about you being impressed because of her picture and being upset she uses that same standard. Ah...i see now. But this is starting to become complicated. If i find it rude to dump on someone because of their appearance, am i a hypocrite for finding someone attractive based on appearance? i understand that you're pointing this out. But my point here is that everyone has a reaction to someone's appearance whether it's important to them or not. i'm willing to bet every single member on this site looks at photos and "judges" them to some degree. If anything, i'm guilty of stating something we all do anyway. i'm not religious but this is beginning to smack of, "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone." anthrosub

MistressDREAD -> RE: It is Sad (7/5/2004 8:34:48 PM)
wohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh waiit a moment [8\|] did sumone just say that I was BLAND??? [ jaw drops] I am so so glad Im seeing frustration in the mind of the holder. HA well if My bland can cause frustration imagine what My BOLD can achieve!!! OOOOOh Jah Im so tempted to throw up a fat tittie pic! ]Looks over at the Mods~ok nawwww]

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