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MissMorrigan -> RE: The Haters (11/5/2007 6:16:37 AM)
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When getting to know a submissive, I delve thoroughly into their background (and encourage them to do the same with mine) to ensure that they aren't self-harming by proxy, e.g., the sub that approached me and expected me to treat him with utter contempt on a daily basis, followed with a liberal glassing (he actually expected me to break a bottle or household glass and stab him with it) as and when I felt frustrated/angry. His background revealed parents that had treated him this way and when I explained that while I could be cruel, insofar as being rigid, strict and even relentlessly severe, I would never touch him in anger. His background excluded him from consideration in any case and he was dumbfounded that I had taken such a stance, even branding me 'Undomly' and a fraud. In a way, I'm conforted he thought that of me as I would not like to be the kind of person that lived up to his ideal of a 'dominant' personality.
I rather enjoy being delightfully shocking and debunking the assumptions made by others about me due to their own prejudices.
Whomever would have thought that a Dom/me could not only be affectionate, loving and caring, but also that she/he's not solitary in being a rounded individual.
quote:
ORIGINAL: MadameMarque
I had to laugh, the way you put it. But honestly, I never thought, till reading so many posts on this site, there were so many people who are into BDSM, in some way, yet still believe, at heart, that it's hateful. Or, believe that kinks other than theirs are hateful.
I think, too, that I've met and even gotten involved with people, in the past, who, unbeknownst to me, went into it thinking that because I was a dominant, I was also hardhearted, and kind of a villain. I think they were counting on me not being tender, at heart.
It's like they don't get it at all. You do this with caring and in intimacy. We understand each other. We're supposed to understand, between us, that this is our way of showing love, of having fun, of mating, of getting close. "You only hurt the ones you love," and "Cruel to be kind."
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