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Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:09:22 PM

Posts: 44
Joined: 6/19/2007
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Good evening,

We were recently approached by a female slave who wished to be owned by a couple. We had many conversations, even chatted with her previous owner. The deal breaker was this: this slave demanded that we share pictures with her of us training another submissive (one we are no longer with). We declined. We feel that there is an unspoken obligation to the person in the pics to protect and respect their privacy.

So now, we are searching again. We are seen as "fakes" for not sharing those pics.

What would you have done?

-Daisy

_____________________________

No, no, never a submissive anything! I'm a fully qualified, radical Desperado.
-Anne Stevenson
In the world there is nothing more submissive and weak than water. Yet for attacking that which is hard and strong nothing can surpass it.
-Lao Tzu

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:13:54 PM

Posts: 345
Joined: 7/11/2004
From: Colorado
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MDTopCouple

Good evening,

We were recently approached by a female slave who wished to be owned by a couple. We had many conversations, even chatted with her previous owner. The deal breaker was this: this slave demanded that we share pictures with her of us training another submissive (one we are no longer with). We declined. We feel that there is an unspoken obligation to the person in the pics to protect and respect their privacy.

So now, we are searching again. We are seen as "fakes" for not sharing those pics.

What would you have done?

-Daisy

If not sharing confidential pictures of someone else was a deal breaker, then my opinion is you are lucky you didn't go any further with this person.

We are all "fakes" to people we either don't agree with or we reject.

_____________________________

Knowledge and experience are wonderful things to share. When we stop asking questions, we might as well "hang it up".

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(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:16:50 PM

Posts: 3636
Status: offline

Exactly the same thing that you did.

I'm wondering why she was so insistant on seeing photo's of you with another? A slave DEMANDING something? Are you sure "she" wasn't a he? Sounds like a guy wanting wank photo's.

Anyway, I agree. I would never show photo's, or anything else, of someone else. I always respect someones right to privacy.

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:27:08 PM

Posts: 108
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Sounds like you were very smart to pass that one by

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:29:18 PM

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

I think the best response would be to say you would show such photos at a meet if you both felt this was a relationship worth pursuing, and photo shop the pics so the face of the ex wasn't visible.

Show, not send. And demand the meet first to prove this wasn't some male wanker.

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:33:03 PM

Posts: 403
Joined: 9/16/2004
From: Southern Illinois
Status: offline

I would have done the exact same thing. I wouldn't want a former partner, or even a casual friend, for that matter, sharing pics of me they happen to have with random people on the internet. I would protect their privacy as I would expect them to protect mine. This particular submissive's motives should've been suspect, in my opinion. It's probably for the best that you found out now, rather than later.

Best of Luck,
~MrsShadows~

Edited for Spelling...

< Message edited by TheShadows -- 11/7/2007 4:35:31 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:44:06 PM

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Joined: 12/3/2004
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I wouldn't take pics or video without the other persons consent. I wouldn't distribute them out to just anyone either.

Here in DFW, a teacher lost her job because a risque pic of her at a bacholeret party was posted on MySpace.

Pics, videos, and such are major ordeals. If you're going to be called a fake just becuase you aren't willing to share your intimate past pictures with them, then it's there loss.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:48:11 PM

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
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If his previous had an agreement with the dom that all pictures wouldn't be shared period, or at the very least with out my permission, it wouldn't matter if they blacked the face out or not, they broke an agreement by showin the pics around if they didn't ask, for pemission to use them, or if they never had permission period in the first place to show them around, face blacked out or not..

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

and photo shop the pics so the face of the ex wasn't visible.

< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 11/7/2007 4:49:40 PM >

(in reply to Celeste43)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 4:49:26 PM

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MDTopCouple

Good evening,

We were recently approached by a female slave who wished to be owned by a couple. We had many conversations, even chatted with her previous owner. The deal breaker was this: this slave demanded that we share pictures with her of us training another submissive (one we are no longer with). We declined. We feel that there is an unspoken obligation to the person in the pics to protect and respect their privacy.

So now, we are searching again. We are seen as "fakes" for not sharing those pics.

What would you have done?

-Daisy

Exactly what you did.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 6:19:11 PM

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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I can understand the motivation behind the request, but it's still inappropriate to ask for that particular thing at that stage in the relationship. Much better would have been "So can you meet for coffee next Tuesday?"

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 6:28:41 PM

Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline

send a picture of a cowboy on a horse and say happy trails to you .. good luck on your search . Respecting privacy is a great ting and good call .

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 7:50:21 PM

msindigomontoya

Posts: 28
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline

So now, we are searching again. We are seen as "fakes" for not sharing those pics.
[/quote]

Who sees you as a fake due to this, the actual slave asking you to show you them? My guess is if this person does this on a regular basis they are the one that will get the poor reputation with the local BDSM community at large, (Should you both participate in it that is).

I agree with the rest of the crew here, sharing those pic without the consent of the person involved would be an invasion of that persons privacy. If someone thinks you are a "fake" thats their problem. How you see yourself is much more important then how others see you.

Indigo

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 8:31:32 PM

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Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline

Just started here but I will say that I would never share pics, with anyone for any reason. Those were ment for you and no one else. You're not a fake becuse you showed proper care to others. You should be proud of your handling of it all. You have my respect for not falling for whoever that flunk was.

(in reply to msindigomontoya)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 8:40:32 PM

RRafe

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Joined: 8/29/2007
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The same,outing someone under your care is a violation of trust.

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(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 8:41:42 PM

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
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I would consider sharing the pictures a deal breaker because it shows you would break someone else's confidentiality and trust.

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 10:13:14 PM

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Joined: 4/7/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I can understand the motivation behind the request, but it's still inappropriate to ask for that particular thing at that stage in the relationship. Much better would have been "So can you meet for coffee next Tuesday?"

And bring the hamburgers too

_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 10:16:45 PM

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

In the end, it doesn't matter what we would have done. You've done as your ethics dictated. There's nothing more to be said as long as you feel ok with your actions. Go with your gut.

Master Fire

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(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/7/2007 10:26:53 PM

Posts: 15477
Joined: 2/11/2006
From: USA
Status: offline

Hello Daisy,

You say, you were "approached by a female slave who wished to be owned by a couple." The evidence says, you were approached by someone who just wanted to con some pictures out of you.

I'd go with the evidence.

Be well,

Kirata

< Message edited by Kirata -- 11/7/2007 10:27:41 PM >

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/8/2007 1:21:47 AM

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MDTopCouple

Good evening,

We were recently approached by a female slave who wished to be owned by a couple. We had many conversations, even chatted with her previous owner. The deal breaker was this: this slave demanded that we share pictures with her of us training another submissive (one we are no longer with). We declined. We feel that there is an unspoken obligation to the person in the pics to protect and respect their privacy.

So now, we are searching again. We are seen as "fakes" for not sharing those pics.

What would you have done?

While yours seems an odd deal breaker to come unstuck over, I agree with you....

As far as I'm concerned, my past relationships are right where they belong - in the past. So I don't share details beyond an occasional first name and I certainly don't share private or intimate details.

Of course, this is also why I don't offer or request references, either. But that's a whole other flame war.... lol

Focus.

(in reply to MDTopCouple)

RE: Would you...? - 11/8/2007 6:00:00 AM

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

If his previous had an agreement with the dom that all pictures wouldn't be shared period, or at the very least with out my permission, it wouldn't matter if they blacked the face out or not, they broke an agreement by showin the pics around if they didn't ask, for pemission to use them, or if they never had permission period in the first place to show them around, face blacked out or not..

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

and photo shop the pics so the face of the ex wasn't visible.

If there were such an agreement, which the op didn't state. But I'm betting he wouldn't ever have to show the picture because this new femsub was actually a male wanting porn.

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)

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