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WayHome -> RE: real life dominatrix (8/23/2004 7:10:18 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Sundew02
WayHome, Not that I do not find the comments you made true in some instances, but..... In general, I know of very few Dominants, either gender, who totally support their sub/slaves.
Oops. I didn't mean to say that many totally supported. What I'm saying is that female submissives often get gifts and assistance from male dominants (paying for school or for sexy clothing seems very common). At the same time female dominants often get gifts and/or support from their male submissives. Paying for dinner, buying toys, cash, etc. (usually even buying their own collars) The reverse is much less common.
What I getting at is that decades ago women became very aware of being objectified in their relations with men. Many women and men have become sensitive to this over the years and progress has followed.
Much more recently men have started to become aware of being objectified in their relations with women. While women's objectification takes the form of sex-object, men's objectification takes the form of success-object. Just as women have said "All they want is sex, why can't they just appreciate me for ME." Men have begun to say, "All they want is money/success/prestige/a house, why can't they just appreciate me for ME?"
Within the lifestyle, we play with and explore these feelings. Sometimes we even find pleasure in them and choose objectification. But some will still lament not being appreciated for "what's inside" and to me that is what the origin of this thread was. A simple expression of a feeling very common in our modern world. Some male submissives revel in "finnancial domination" which is objectification, the male equivalent of a submissive slut who revels in objectification as a sex toy. echowolf429 is obviously not one of those males. You will find some sub females expressing the same feelings regarding doms who seem to only want sex and housework. Are they saying that's what all doms want? No. They are expressing their emotional experience.
I have nothing against pros, or semi-pros. I had a freind at my old home who was a self-proclaimed "big, fat, ugly, Bitch". She was a full time lifestyler (mostly lesbian), but she also had some paying clients. Men who gave her money to humiliate and torture them. Was she doing it for the money? Yes, sometimes mostly for the money and sometimes less so. Her clients liked it that way. She always got off on being "repulsive" and yet sought after so much that men paid very good money. Nothing wrong with that, everyone knows exactly whats going on and it works for everyone. That was my first exposure to a "pro". I have a lot of respect for anyone who can carve their own trail in this world and do it while being true to themselves and to those around them.
On the other hand I have seen "pros" who embodied all the worst aspects of a whore or a lap dancer. They fake enthusiasm for cash. They lead on those that would pay into thinking there is more to be had and thus inspire them to pay even more. The fact that they are not having sex has nothing to do with it. It's the attitude that makes them not respectable. (I have to add that the two examples I know are both in their early 20s and fit all the worst stereotypes of Dominas in that age group and I KNOW full well that not all of them do)
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