RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (Full Version)

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DarkDaddyZ -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/14/2007 2:28:21 PM)

Communities have changed over the past years and The San Francisco Bay Area is one of the largest. It is also one of the most "cliquish"  that is a combination of things.  The first community I had any experience in was Nashville, TN in the late 80s early 90s.  There was only one group in town for all sexual orientations and kinks and while we had "squabbles" for the most part it was a good group (PEP-TN for those interested).  In the 94 I relocated to Atlanta.  While the community was much better, there was a segregation between sexes there which I didn't like.  By 1996 when Southeast Leather was kicking ass and the major interest in Mr Frank Puckett as well as the Duchess with the het community, the straight and gay community starting working together,  when The Sanctuary of A Dark Angel became the local hangout for the pansexual group "The Tribe" then Atlanta became one of the most inclusive leather communities in the country.  There were squabbles but for the most part it was a great time.  The community even hosted  a community round table in the summer of 1998 at the Sanctuary that had over 300 attendees!  The diversity was amazing.

In late 1999, I relocated to the San Francisco Bay Area, the community was much larger than that of Atlanta and it was very segregated between the hets in one place and the straights in the other.  Still there were only 2 major play places at that time, House of Differences and Castlebar.  The Power Exchange was (still is) a very successful sex club that had a BDSM undertone to it.  With the exception of the Folsom Street Fair, hets and straights rarely got out together and I'm not 100 percent sure when this happened because when Society Of Janus first started it was much like TES was being a big mix of people.  The original founders of SMOdyssey in my opinion takes credit in bringing a lot of the community together when they started producing Folsom Fringe.  Since then diversity is much better in the San Francisco Bay Area community especially in the South Bay with Edges and SCCLA but still not as much as I'd like it to be and because of that, I don't attend as much events and munches.  I should add that Carol Queen's Center of Sex and Culture is a great resource for queer, pansexual and gay kinky people but I don't see the het leather folk use it as much.

There has been numerous explanations given to me by my queer leather friends who I play with from time to time.  Many of them relocated to San Francisco because of the queer and gay community.  They came here to be a part of that experience much like southerners move to Atlanta for the same thing.  They didn't "have" to go one dungeon to play and share space with hets etc.  They like playing in their own space.  This past Saturday, I  DJ'd a party at one of my (het) promotions that one of my queer leathergrrlfriend's doubled as a birthday party.  At the after party at her suite, I noticed that all the hets where in the living room and the queers were in one of the bedrooms. Even at the event there wasn't a lot of mixing.  While I understand this mind frame, I love the inclusion of everyone so it bothers me too.

I enjoy traveling and used to love going to leather events in NYC when Hellfire was downtown. I haven't been there since it moved to Brooklyn.  Is Paddles still doing big things?

Good topic.




LadyLynx -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/14/2007 2:54:43 PM)

Well I guess the shiny "newness" hasn't rubbed off for me yet.  I have been taking part of my local community for almost a year and a half, and I am really enjoying so far.  a munch nearly every week, 2/3 public play parties every month. there seems to be alittle intergretion between the str8's and GBLT community, but I havn't noticed alot.




RumpusParable -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/14/2007 4:18:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KinkyRN

I'm just curious....  Do you feel like you are a part of a local BDSM community where you live??  How do you feel about your own community?  What are some positive/negative aspects about it?



Yes, I do feel I am.

I feel pretty good about the community.

Positive:  Nice folks, lately there's been a fair bit of going-ons.

Negative:  It's small and there are few younger people active in our local group.  This isn't the fault of the group's, but rather the area we're in. 

It's really hard to get word out and include more folks and advertise events in a place where it's as risky as it can be here for many members... so the community tends to be hard to even find for folks interested.  If I hadn't been Damned Determined to find it when I new I was moving to Augusta, I doubt I'd have ever known.  I had to really search, visit many dead links, many bounced emails, etc. before hitting paydirt.

It's not like we're NYC, or even Atlanta, where you can put out flyers to an open event (or hell, even have open events).  As much as I really enjoy the community here I'm constantly kicking myself for not taking more advantage of the more open environments I've lived in before.  Hindsight and all that.

But yeah, we've a community and it's a pretty good one.  I like it and have been able to meet some really great people through it.  I'm happy about it.




SanctuaryInHim -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/14/2007 4:47:10 PM)

-fast reply-

Salt Lake City has a pretty great crowd. There's been some changes made to the old club and I haven't started reattending that one yet, though I plan to once my life settles back down. We hold play parties and munches and a weekly 'class'.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/14/2007 9:36:09 PM)

The good part about living in DC/NY/LA is that you can only really complain about there being TOO MUCH of anything.

My main home base of DC/Baltimore I've been out of touch with mostly for over a year- but I liked it a lot because there really was something for everyone.  The swingers, the weekenders, the lifers, the leatherfolk, the educators, the builders.  You got outdoor events, you got indoor events.  You get small local parties and you get huge weekend conventions.  You had groups that were warm, you had groups that were cold.  You even have age play munches there. 

The only bad part about being SO much is that people inevitably narrow down to just a few groups and as a shy person, I found it hard to break past the "welcoming circle" and into the "regular part of the gang" but then I think I have that issue everywhere.

Worst part of DC were the politics and hot headed ones.  While not generally an issue except during elections, they were a regular dark cloud over things, and only get worse as grudges pile upon grudges.  I know this is not unique to DC, but it is a distinct facet of its personality.

Now, onto my new home of Austin.  I think Austin's scene is much like Austin itself.  A lot more alive than I expected- while not like DC where you have to choose between four parties every weekend, you still get at least one event every weekend and it's not uncommon to have more than one to choose from.  So while not quite as vast in character as I'm used to, there's still plenty of life to be had.

However, the leather/hetero scenes are far more divided from what I can tell.  The hetero scene is extremely HETERO and gender biased, though less so in the youngster crowd.  People here like their boxes, they like slaves being slaves and masters being arrogant dorks.  There's a bit of xenophobia and lack of awareness of the larger bdsm culture, but there's also an eagerness to be involved and just have fun.  And they play a lot later and more casually- serious play before midnight is rare.




shootingstar67 -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/15/2007 2:30:46 AM)

So far I am unable to contact anyone so I can even attend a munch. They don't email me back




MrThorns -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/15/2007 3:51:54 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

a bit off topic

Glad to see you back safely [:)]

As smiley said.. I'm not home yet, but thank you just the same. :)

And smilezz isn't kidding about wanting to "help" by administering healthy doses of Purell for cuts...
(She's an Evil little schlampe)

~Thorns 




IrishMist -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (11/15/2007 5:13:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: smilezz

Offers Purell for the cut i am SURE she got by kicking the wall...and everyone knows that Purell is good for cuts. *EG*


*winks*


I am sure that as soon as The Man steps foot in this Country again, i will be leaving posts all over the place. LOL!


~smilezz~

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Wait a sec
Let me kick the wall some more first [8D]

quote:

  As smiley said.. I'm not home yet, but thank you just the same. :)

And smilezz isn't kidding about wanting to "help" by administering healthy doses of Purell for cuts...
(She's an Evil little schlampe)

~Thorns 


LOL I got so excited for her when I saw your post [&:] Quite a let down when I realized that no, you were still gone [:(]




JDame -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/26/2017 8:50:35 AM)

I am very actively evolved in my local community, We pride ourselves on accepting anyone's kink ( safe sane and consensual and risk aware consensual kink), I with other friend in the community have opened a private members only club to benefit the community We have great groups in our area long standing groups but meet in local bars that allow us to have our demos there but no play parties. The Club offers a 4500 square foot play space with a lot of different play stations to have your kink on and we have a large little's area. We will start doing demos soon but really want to leave that to the other groups in the community because they do it well. We are licences by the state and local government, the local police department knows who we are and what we do. We are an non profit and all money come into the club is to support the operating of the club. All of the running of the club is done by volunteers. I Think this will work well with other long standing groups in my community aside from some of the haters that want their group to still be the only game in town. Im excited to be a part of this dungeon and still love my community. J Dame




peppermint -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/26/2017 9:49:02 AM)

You're new here. If you look above your name on the left hand side of the page you'll see RE: followed by the title of the post and the date that the new post was made. In this case it was 2007. The people who wrote on this are long gone. It would probably have been better to start a new post with the same topic. You could have referred back to the original post.

However, welcome to the forums. We can always use new people on here. Please keep contributing.




tiemeupalso -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/26/2017 12:31:40 PM)

I live in a rural area of central Texas.i would rate my local community as non existant.
if anyone different PLEASE lit me know




DesFIP -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/26/2017 12:36:18 PM)

Fetlife lists multiple upcoming events near Cameron.




ResidentSadist -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/27/2017 1:22:51 AM)

Come to Florida... we are the "capital of kink"
More nudist colonies than anywhere else in the world
BDSM organizations in every major city
Hetro & gay BDSM crossover in many orgs
Several huge BDSM events annually
Tons of gay resorts (south Florida)

For a while, alt-sex kinksters who came to certain festivals/events in Florida paid cash for most everything they can with $2 bills. They were* sending a message to local merchants and Florida government that the kink dollar is important to the economy. And that message got through.

... Florida rocks.


* Note: I haven't followed the $2 bill campaign in several years. Don't know if it is still going.


[ETA] Didn't see this was a necro... my bad..




shiftyw -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/27/2017 5:57:07 AM)

There's a very small tight knit community about an hour away. It seems like a dozen or so people are involved.

I could commute to Boston but it's not important enough for me to drive that far. I live in very rural NH.




ThatDizzyChick -> RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? (9/28/2017 1:51:35 PM)

FR
I rate it pretty fucking cool, because we are it.




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