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ORIGINAL: stormsfate

Holy cow! I can't believe junkyard was the only one to get moderated!

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ORIGINAL: Fidelity

I never claimed to BE him LAM. The fact that she saw fit to HIDE it from him spoke volumes to me-she had to have known it would have made things a mess between them.

Otherwise,why all the sneaking around behind his back?

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They CHOSE to-so much for emotional self-control.

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i used to care... but now i take a pill for that

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ORIGINAL: thelight

i think a lot of people feel trapped in their marriages. they want out, but just cand find a way. so they cheat in order to bring a little happiness into an otherwise dreary life. how does that song go? "everybody needs a little sunshine..." when you're miserable, morality goes down the toilet. if you can find a temporary fix, you're gonna take it, as surely as you would steal food if you were hungry and broke.

for example, a friend of mine is married to an argentinian woman. she told him that there would be no reason for her to remain in the states if he divorced her, so she would take their two kids back with her to argentina. he would only be able to see them once a year, at most. he's miserable in his marriage, but he can't bear the though of not having his kids near him. so he cheats, and i don't blame him.

in my own situation, i married at an early age. even then, i knew i was kinky and that my wife was not, but i figured either she would open up, or my kinkiness would wane as i aged. neither has happened. i have tried to gently pesuade my wife into more kinky activities, and she has gone along to please me, but she wasn't into it, and i can't get into it with a partner who isn't into it.

we are very much in love, and she has told me that it would break her heart if she found out that i cheated on her. at the same time, she says that she can't stand the thought of losing me, and so if i ever get to the point where i am torn between cheating on her or divorcing her, i should go ahead and have a discrete affair. i haven't done so yet, but if the right person comes along, i surely will.

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ORIGINAL: caitlyn

I think it is very cool to take a moral stand, and maybe a little less cool to be judgemental towards other people.

I'll go out with an older married guy in a minute, as long as he tells me in advance that he's married. He's not going to get me in bed, but we can go out, have fun, go dancing, get drunk, whetever. If he is really cool, fooling around a little isn't out of the question.

I don't want to know about his situation at home, and really don't care. We're both getting what we want I guess. Maybe he is hurting his wife at home, but maybe she is doing the same thing ... that's just none of my business.

I'm only responsible for me. I do a crummy job of that already, without worrying about someone else.

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ORIGINAL: luvdragonx

I have to ask: if you care about hurting her so much, why not just tell her you're interested in sleeping with another woman? If she doesn't want to lose you, as you've said, and you care about her, as you've said, then why not be up front with her and let her make the decision?

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ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176

This is a morally bankrupt position, anyway you slice it. One is always responsible for the impact of their actions. Just because you can't see the damage you are doing to a woman's marriage by dating her husband doesn't mean you don't still share culpability for knowingly interfering in their marital affairs.

That's just silly Timothy, any way you slice it.

Its not like I'm the only girl on Earth, and if I said no when a married guy asks me out, that means he will go running home to his wife and make everything better.

This is an issue between a man and his wife. What I do has no impact on that issue, and frankly it just isn't any of my business, and more that what I do is any of your business.

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ORIGINAL: caitlyn

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ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176

This is a morally bankrupt position, anyway you slice it. One is always responsible for the impact of their actions. Just because you can't see the damage you are doing to a woman's marriage by dating her husband doesn't mean you don't still share culpability for knowingly interfering in their marital affairs.

That's just silly Timothy, any way you slice it.

Its not like I'm the only girl on Earth, and if I said no when a married guy asks me out, that means he will go running home to his wife and make everything better.

This is an issue between a man and his wife. What I do has no impact on that issue, and frankly it just isn't any of my business, and more that what I do is any of your business.