RE: domme/sub

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: domme/sub

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: domme/sub

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: domme/sub - 8/16/2005 4:54:22 PM

LadyofLight

Posts: 60
Status: offline

Yes, ecspecially when they are the one to bring the Domme out in you. Doesn't everyone always 'fall in love' with their first ?

(in reply to GentleLady)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: domme/sub - 8/16/2005 4:58:02 PM

LadyofLight

Posts: 60
Status: offline

Emotional hell doesn't last long before acceptance kicks in.

(in reply to saret)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: domme/sub - 8/16/2005 11:30:28 PM

TiNeedsHouseboy

Posts: 145
Joined: 4/24/2005
From: Big Apple blossom blown to The Windy City
Status: offline

Mark Twain had some of the greatest notions about lying. (Well, when it came to a wit with words, topping Mark Twain will always be a major challenge!) Two of my Twain favorites are:

<< Note that venerable proverb: Children and fools always speak the truth. The deduction is plain: adults and wise persons never speak it. >>
"On the Decay of the Art of Lying" by Mark Twain

<< The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome,
of graceful and gilded forms of charitable and unselfish lying. >>
"On the Decay of the Art of Lying" by Mark Twain

quote:

ORIGINAL: tarnishedhalo777
I don't think after our fight last night there will be resurrection of anything. too many things have been said,by him to justify his running around/lies and by me in my pain. tryng to hurt him back.It's OVER and thats that.

There's a running theme weaving throughout these boards: The consequences of lying to a significant other. Whether it causes a relationship's demise is a function of multiple factors: how far into the relationship the lie occurs, how extreme the lie is, and whether the partners are married/collared/deeply committed.

Crap-tastic moments occur in all established relationships.

In some cases, there might be a lie that one must deal with as a learning experience. Whatever prompted the lie is worked through, and the relationship continues. Example: partner has a secret affair, where his secret is discovered, or he feels the need to confess. There's pain, but with a great deal of effort and communication, the partner's lapse is resolved and the couple blazes a new shared trail. I gather this was the sort of issue you faced when the lie monster first reared its head in your relationship.

In other cases, the lie is extreme and/or super hurtful and/or becomes an escalating behavioral pattern. The wounds it causes are too deep. Healing will occur, but only with a scar left behind. I sense this is the place where you feel you are. As devastating as this experience has been, in time you will be able to gain perspective. You will be glad and proud that you found the inner strength to realize you deserve a partner who cherishes you. Once healed, you will also be able to look back and smile about: (1) moments you enjoyed together, and (2) what you learned from the relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tarnishedhalo777
I think the ice cream was ben n jerrys,lol.

You must be thinking of the ever popular Cherry Garcia. That, however, was not the ice cream I meant. Haagen-Dazs has a brand new lower fat line: Cherry Fudge Truffle, Coffee, Dulce de Leche, Dutch Chocolate, Mint Chip, S'mores, Vanilla Bean. I'm attaching a screen shot. I don't know how they did it, but the "mouth feel" is the same as the regular line.

Since I opened with Mark Twain, I'll close with another of the great word masters:

<< Men always want to be a woman's first love. Women like to be a man's last romance. >>
~~ Oscar Wilde

~ Ti ~

Attachment (1)

(in reply to tarnishedhalo777)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: domme/sub - 8/17/2005 1:10:08 AM

TiNeedsHouseboy

Posts: 145
Joined: 4/24/2005
From: Big Apple blossom blown to The Windy City
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyofLight
Emotional hell doesn't last long before acceptance kicks in.

Well, not always. Just because you accept the end of a relationship, that may not mark the end of emotional hell. (Not to be confused with adult-hostile Yahell. Sorry, had to toss that in. They keep killing off adult groups. It's truly infuriating.)

When my relationship ended with my soul mate -- not due to any incompatibility between us -- I almost immediately accepted its termination -- intellectually. Unfortunately, just because your brain grasps a concept, that does not stop your heart from reeling. It took me nearly two years to fully heal and be able to fall in love again (a totally unexpected outcome at that moment in time).

There's a permanent scar covering our relationship's demise. I also discovered that it was possible to rip open its scar, though that was a one-shot deal. (Knock wood.)

Ripping it open occurred more than two decades after we were no longer a couple. I found out that he died. When his father explained the circumstances surrounding his death, and events leading up to it, emotional hell returned for a brief period. After all, he was my soul mate. He will always be part of me.

Brief editorial side trip: IMO his death was a reflection of the bind that I see quite a few naturally submissive men landing in: they fall prey to and get suckered by narcissistic, manipulative, vampire, bitch queens -- who don't have an iota of dominance in them. The lucky ones are able to escape. The not so lucky ones, like my soul mate, give and give until every ounce of blood is drained from them. The emotional devastation is overwhelming.

In the case of my soul mate, he had a congenital heart defect. It never gave him a moment of grief while we were together. Given what that narcissistic bitch did to him, he literally died of a broken heart when he was 49.

Due to the need for closure, I got rid of being tossed back into hell by going to see his gravesite. Still, the scar will always be there. At least it will remain closed from now on. Hopefully.

~ Ti ~

(in reply to LadyofLight)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: domme/sub - 8/23/2005 10:14:12 AM

tarnishedhalo777

Posts: 119
Status: offline

yes there is a scar left behind.

_____________________________

I will not die the death of loneliness by being afraid to love and afraid to get hurt. I will not commit figurative suicide by leaving my potential underdeveloped because I am afraid to take risks.

(in reply to TiNeedsHouseboy)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: domme/sub - 8/25/2005 9:33:54 AM

lonewolf05

Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyofLight

Yes, ecspecially when they are the one to bring the Domme out in you. Doesn't everyone always 'fall in love' with their first ?

=============
NO!

_____________________________

"there is no gravity, life sucks!"

(in reply to LadyofLight)

Profile

Post #: 46