GentleLady
Posts: 356
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
The other thing that is more clear to me now is that what we're really talking about here is devotion. When two people are devoted to each other and are in a relationship that is a partnership, they are constantly taking the other person's needs/wants/feelings into consideration. When he asks me for something, I generally do anything in my power to give it to him, even if requires compromise on my part. That does not make me submissive to him.
I can say the same thing about My relationship and yet I call it a 24/7 power exchange. The difference being that although Tony will ask if he can masturbate and ejactulate and I usually say yes, I still have the authority to say no and he is aware of that fact. Just because I take his needs, wants, and feeling into consideration and just because I make choices based on keeping the relationship healthy (even if I must give up things I prefer), does not make My relationship an equal partnership.
This sums it up best quote:
I'm never in role - I'm just me, and she's just her, and we are as we are, at all times. Asleep I am still me.
quote:
When I compare this all to my "mindset" when I am actually *dominating* my partner, it's quite different. I am 100% completely selfish, feeding my own needs, not that interested in the idea of compromise, and driven by my own sensual, erotic need for fetish play and nasty games.
This is one are where you and I are different. Even when I am feeding My hunger for a particular activity (flogging, cbt, orgasm control, tease, ass play, whatever) I am never completely selfish. I am selfish in that My need is going to be met but how I meet that need will depend on his needs and physical/emotional state at the time. I do not see that as compromising but I do see it as taking into consideration the reality that both of us have needs to be met and that both of us have lives.
I also do not have a different "mindset" when I am "dominating" Tony. I am dominating him when he brings Me the coffee after supper as per My standing request. I am dominating when I tell him to strip while he is doing the dishes just so I can watch his ass and watch his reactions. I am dominating when I decide when we go shopping and which stores. I am dominating when I choose certain clothes to wear knowing exactly what reaction he gets from them. I am dominating when I decide that he is going to cum now. I am dominating when I tell him that he will do the driving and does need to ask Me each time if I want to drive...I will tell him when I want to drive.
Gentle Lady
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All things are possible to those who have patience, try, and are willing to learn.
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RE: 24/7 power dynamic - how do you define it? - 
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