A crucial question... (Full Version)

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Doug04 -> A crucial question... (7/6/2004 1:00:40 PM)

Hello buddies!!

I was thinking...
What does make you feel good with torture in general??
I mean, How does it become a natural thing!
I just discovered this feeling relatively late , I'm 24 now and it only make sense to me since last year.
I'd like to know when did you start to like these stuffs?
let me know
:)
Peace



anthrosub -> RE: A crucial question... (7/6/2004 1:55:20 PM)

Doug...
Welcome to Collarme. I'm sure you will get a lot of different answers to your question. For me, it's about pleasing my Owner and the fulfillment of providing Her pleasure. There's also a sense of inward pride at being able to give of myself (or be taken) to Her satisfaction. If the torture is for disciplinary purposes, then I get a feeling of having been purified for lack of a better explanation. I have heard it said that nobody actually enjoys pain (even masochists) and find that intriguing.

anthrosub



proudsub -> RE: A crucial question... (7/6/2004 2:56:42 PM)

quote:

I have heard it said that nobody actually enjoys pain (even masochists) and find that intriguing.


I really do enjoy pain to an extent. I started with clothespins on my nips and couldn't believe how much i liked that, it always made me very horny. Now i love a good sting on my ass as well as nip torture. I would like to experience more but Hubby isn't into much more than that. He keeps saying He doesn't want to hurt me when i beg for more.



cityslaveforuse -> RE: A crucial question... (7/6/2004 5:01:44 PM)

I agree with those two posters. I enjoy pain to a certain extend and I enjoy even more to be challenged to totally please my Dom. I started early, as a teenager, but then I didn't really know what it was that I was feeling. I became serious about it also in the early 20s



MistressDREAD -> RE: A crucial question... (7/6/2004 5:38:17 PM)

hello Doug buddie!!

hmmmm first recolection
of a Sadistic act applyed..
I was about 6 or 7 cause
I was in My first year of
school.....
Id catch the ferrol cats
on the way home and
use My schools uniforms
tie to make a rope
and put their neck in a
noose and swing them
around in circles above
My head till they stopped
screeching their meows
then Id shake them till
they woke up and tried
to run away. Sum dident
wake up and ended up
in the cows pens where
the deadmans crows always
sat on the side of the fence.
Even as a mature adult who
has control of My actions at
all times, when I hold a cat
Im tempted to sweeze My
fingers around their lil necks
and make them meow that
special I think Im gonna die
meow. Of course none die
now, and its been a very
long time since Ive heard
that whining......~wicked smile~
and yes I have Owned many
cats over the years.
DREAD



naughtybutnice -> RE: A crucial question... (7/6/2004 9:33:44 PM)

I've found that I enjoy pain more when it's with something pleasureable. It intensifies both the feeling of pain and pleasure. For instance, clothes pin or clamps on the nips and being taken from behind. (You know that f word! ~giggles~) Absolutely drives this girl insane. The good insane, not the padded room insane. I have been craving more intense pain..but there's the fear factor. I think it's all a mixture of feelings that heightens your awareness that makes it alll goood! [:D]



thewaitress -> RE: A crucial question... (7/8/2004 12:54:35 AM)

i was always a spoilt child, given what i wanted when i wanted. i dont think it was a structured household and i longed for rules. I used to dream of having stricter parents from an early age. They filled my life with material things but never worried about what time i got home or had i done my homework.
I now have a lot of stress in my work, a lot of decision making, delegating and for me to submit to my Master is a healthy relief.



kiki blue -> RE: A crucial question... (7/13/2004 5:26:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDREAD
Sum dident
wake up and ended up
in the cows pens where
the deadmans crows always
sat on the side of the fence.


I think that this post confuses sadism with cruelty to animals.

I believe in "ethical sadism", where, while the person inflicting the pain may delight in the cruelty and the suffering of the 'victim', they're not out to harm them. Hurt, yes, but not harm. I may play with sadist who I do know delight in inflicting as much pain as possible, but I know they wouldn't do anything to intentionally harm me.

"Unethical sadism" is someone who beats another person and doesn't give a rats how they are afterwards.

Quite honestly, I wouldn't become involved with someone who I knew to have tortured animals.



MrThorns -> RE: A crucial question... (7/13/2004 8:10:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: anthrosub

I have heard it said that nobody actually enjoys pain (even masochists) and find that intriguing.

anthrosub[/color]


Interesting theory... However I have had scenes with my slave that only exist for her to feel intense pain. No warm up, no slap and tickle, no subspace. Her "Here and now" is the pain she feels..not some inner sanctuary of peace and serenity...(And if she starts going there, change the stroke, toy, whatever..and bring her back to the here an now.)

We do this because she truly enjoys the pain. This isn't how we conduct all of our scenes, as I enjoy the sensualism of BDSM as much as I enjoy the sadism, but we do "Present Tense Pain" that we both find enjoyable...Its almost theraputic...catharsis rocks.


Doug,

I started enjoying the "torture" aspects of BDSM about 4 years ago. When I first started learning about BDSM, I couldn't imagine how someone could find pleasure in giving or receiving pain. So, I chose to follow a more sensual path. Happily enougfh for me and the masochists I play with, I learned to embrace sadism. I enjoy the feeling of power that a sadistic headspace gives me...I enjoy watching angry red welts appear on a girls body after a really good stroke, I love being Evil...in a good way.

~Thorns



Voltare -> RE: A crucial question... (7/13/2004 9:56:53 AM)

For what it's worth, most munches (informal gatherings for people in the lifestyle usually held once every week or two in large cities) usually have the median age at around between 30 - 40 years old. At 26, I received a rather chilly reception (as most single men in their twenties do) as their concern would be a) being a young-single-man-only-interested-in-sex, and b) a young-single-man-competing-with-older-less-appealing-couples/men-only-looking-for-sex(said tongue in cheek of course.)

Most people seem to get into the lifestyle in their early 30s. Consider yourself an 'early bloomer.'

Stephan



afmvdp -> RE: A crucial question... (7/13/2004 1:33:10 PM)

Thought I had replied to this already. Must not of went through. Anyway, from the begining.

While your post does not fully make it clear as to whether your desire is to recieve the torture or to torture someone else but I have to wonder how you just happened to stumble upon you realizing you like either. Perhaps I am a rarity but I have had many of my desires and my attitudes towards the whole situation since I had been very young, now I can't say I ever got off strangling kittens and I find the nonchalant way in which that was mentioned to be rather disturbing but I digress. I do remember quite vividly times when I would tie up my close female friend at the time in a hammock net chair and laugh as she screamed and tried to wiggle her way out, tickling or prodding her all the way to make the escape far more difficult. I remember always thinking of ways to overcome others both physically and mentally. I came into my sexual desires and fulfillment at a rather young age so perhaps that is part of it, but I don't really see where a desire as unique as these would just happen to pop into your mind as a stunning revelation of your being. Theres no explaining as to why someone enjoys what they do nor a way to explain how to enjoy it more, it is inherant within each indivuals mind and spirit and body.

Now then if what you're really meaning (which I believe is the reality whether admitted or not) to say you like being a little kiny in a nice and tame vanilla world,then perhaps torture isn't really the right word to be using. A little paddling or nipple pinching here or there and some fuzzy cuffs do not equal torture. Just something to think about. Perhaps if you went into more detail other responses could be more helpful.



LadyAngelika -> RE: A crucial question... (7/13/2004 3:37:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Doug04
I was thinking...
What does make you feel good with torture in general??
I mean, How does it become a natural thing!
I just discovered this feeling relatively late , I'm 24 now and it only make sense to me since last year.
I'd like to know when did you start to like these stuffs?
let me know


I think you either inherently like it or you don’t. When I started off with kink games around the age of 18, more often then not, I found men and women who wanted to dominate me. My desires were to try both but part of me feared that I could seriously harm someone if I let my desires out completely. So I tried to submit. I was such a bad sub but a wonderful masochist. I can take pain like nobody’s business. And yes, the endorphin rush from the pain made me experience all sorts of feelings ranging from rage to euphoria. I used to refer to an S/M session as an exorcism of sorts.

Over time, I realised that I much preferred dominating to my meek attempts at submitting (which was really only topping from the bottom). I have quite the Sadistic streak in me but I am what kiki blue described in an earlier post on this thread as an “ethical sadist”. It is very important for me at all times to know how much pain my sub is in (which in part is very exciting for me to know). One of my favourite ways is either with colors “green, yellow, red” or for more detail with a number scale.

So this being said, it may or may not be a natural thing for you. BDSM is Bondage, Domination/submission and Sado-Masochism. Some enjoy all 3, some only get into one of the 3. It’s up to you to decide what kind of things turn you on and find a partner that enjoys the same things you do.

That said, good luck and enjoy!

- LA



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