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Lumus -> RE: Behavior (12/19/2007 5:40:13 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: takenbyjohnr07
Do You feel that your subs behavior reflects on You? Sometimes i read posts more frequent than not where the subs ridicule, attack, insult, put others down, and are just so ugly and vulgar in what they write to those who do not deserve it and i was just wondering as a Dominant what is Your opinion about subs that do that? Besides the obvious they are immature and probably lonely and bitter. Would You mind if Your sub acted that way?
Vulgar and snide commentary aside...my submissive would make herself look bad if she acted in an anti-social manner. The only possible way that can reflect on me is if I have trained her to behave as such, or recognized this behaviour and ignored it.
My submissive feels regretful if she acts out publicly and has expressed she feels that she's made me look bad. My response to that is not gentle but it is not judgmental, either, and goes something along this vein: "Stop and ask yourself why you behaved that way. Learn from it. Don't do it again. Repeat as necessary. If you have in fact made me look bad I will correct it, should I feel the need to. Do not come to me to dictate your instinctive behaviour, however. I can teach you and advise you, but I'm not about to replace your personality - that's your job, so suck it up and do it, or you'll feel worse the next time. That also means when in doubt, ask! Especially if I remind you about this conversation. Isn't that right, girl...?"
She hates that response but there's little to argue there. It lets her feel the weight of her actions, reminds her how to correct the situation, and settles things as they should be...at least, for what suits me - which is all that counts, to her.
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