A question for the Pro

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eponastar -> A question for the Pro (12/18/2007 10:25:28 PM)
I realize there was a thread about being a professional earlier in this forum but this is a bit different question. I am considering becoming a professional domme to help finance my education. I am curious as to how I should go about, making this happen. Any advice ladies?

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/19/2007 5:04:30 AM)
If you're going to go into business doing this - treat it like a business. What that means is that you need to be smart about it - consult a local lawyer who knows your area's adult industry laws to find out where the legal lines are drawn, and talk to an accountant to understand how best to handle the money you make from a legal standpoint. Don't rely on message board advice or even advice from local pros regarding this - a few bad decisions in these areas may haunt you for a long time. It also wouldn't hurt to look at a couple models of business plans, and sit down and do one yourself - it will help you clarify things like how much money you'll need to get started and how much you can realistically expect to make, what you have to offer vs. the competition in the area, how to market yourself, etc.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/19/2007 6:12:44 PM)
I cannot stress enough the importance of investigating the local laws concerning "adult" activities. Also, it is very important to have a safe play area SEPARATE from your home. If you can't do that, you might want to consider doing something like phone work, which can be done anywhere, with little overhead. There are lots of threads on here with good advice.

MsSaskia -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/20/2007 12:42:27 PM)
I definitely echo what the other two women have advised above. Additionally, I'd ask if you've given much thought to how much money you're able to invest in your venture. A basic, cheap leather paddle can run about $40. Canes are about the same. Floggers are around $60-100 each if you don't go for fancy. Nipple clamps are $20-30/pair. Getting just one each of gags, blindfolds, ropes, handcuffs, collars, leashes is going to set you back a couple hundred, not to mention anything beyond the bare bones basics. Then there's dungeon furniture, a few fetish outfits, lining up photo shoots, having a decorated space to play (is it soundproofed? will your neighbors notice an increase in short-duration traffic?), setting up a website, paying for advertising and getting a cell phone. Having a lawyer on retainer and hiring a CPA to help you set up as a business and advise you on how much to set aside for (quarterly) taxes (about 25% of your income) is also strongly advisable. It's funny how having no income on paper means you don't collect Social Security and can't qualify for loans, establish credit or inform future employers what you were doing during that strangely blank time on your resume. Get a CPA. If you're new enough to the scene that you don't own any basic toys or wardrobe, you're going to need some kind of training so you can learn how to use, maintain and clean the basic tools. Regardless, you'll also have to learn how to screen clients (after 11 years, I'm still working on that), learn how to keep clients, and learn how to deal emotionally (and financially) with the no-show artists, mindfuck specialists, stalkers and your own colleagues, who will have no interest in helping you learn the ropes, but will very likely be eager to see you go down since it'll eliminate the competition to have you gone. Sometimes they even help the process along. If you're intent on being a solo practitioner because it seems like an easy and fun way to earn money, you'd do better just doing phone domination. If you apprentice at a house, you'll have a better chance of learning how to get really good at domination, but the money isn't going to be what you'd expect (because houses have to provide way more than just the basics) and you'll still have to invest in wardrobe anyway. If you're set on being a sex worker, stripping and prostitution are where the real money is at. Their overhead is a dream.

MisPandora -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/20/2007 1:10:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsSaskia I definitely echo what the other two women have advised above. Additionally, I'd ask if you've given much thought to how much money you're able to invest in your venture. A basic, cheap leather paddle can run about $40. Canes are about the same. Floggers are around $60-100 each if you don't go for fancy. Nipple clamps are $20-30/pair. Getting just one each of gags, blindfolds, ropes, handcuffs, collars, leashes is going to set you back a couple hundred, not to mention anything beyond the bare bones basics. Then there's dungeon furniture, a few fetish outfits, lining up photo shoots, having a decorated space to play (is it soundproofed? will your neighbors notice an increase in short-duration traffic?), setting up a website, paying for advertising and getting a cell phone. Having a lawyer on retainer and hiring a CPA to help you set up as a business and advise you on how much to set aside for (quarterly) taxes (about 25% of your income) is also strongly advisable. It's funny how having no income on paper means you don't collect Social Security and can't qualify for loans, establish credit or inform future employers what you were doing during that strangely blank time on your resume. Get a CPA. If you're new enough to the scene that you don't own any basic toys or wardrobe, you're going to need some kind of training so you can learn how to use, maintain and clean the basic tools. Regardless, you'll also have to learn how to screen clients (after 11 years, I'm still working on that), learn how to keep clients, and learn how to deal emotionally (and financially) with the no-show artists, mindfuck specialists, stalkers and your own colleagues, who will have no interest in helping you learn the ropes, but will very likely be eager to see you go down since it'll eliminate the competition to have you gone. Sometimes they even help the process along. If you're intent on being a solo practitioner because it seems like an easy and fun way to earn money, you'd do better just doing phone domination. If you apprentice at a house, you'll have a better chance of learning how to get really good at domination, but the money isn't going to be what you'd expect (because houses have to provide way more than just the basics) and you'll still have to invest in wardrobe anyway. If you're set on being a sex worker, stripping and prostitution are where the real money is at. Their overhead is a dream. You've hit the nail on the head! I'd recommend if you have the cohones to be a dom, be a dominant stripper. You'll get all of the sub guys in the place, plus any of the foot boys, etc. You can always arrange external meets for foot worship and things that don't require dungeon equipment or elaborate costuming. You'll have the added security of being able to work in a place where you have monitoring and a general sense of safety (bouncers, etc.)

LadyHibiscus -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/20/2007 7:36:29 PM)
A dominant stripper! Ah, to be young and slender again... LOL

lockmeupplease -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/20/2007 8:26:09 PM)
MisPandora wrote: [/quote] You've hit the nail on the head! I'd recommend if you have the cohones to be a dom, be a dominant stripper. You'll get all of the sub guys in the place, plus any of the foot boys, etc. You can always arrange external meets for foot worship and things that don't require dungeon equipment or elaborate costuming. You'll have the added security of being able to work in a place where you have monitoring and a general sense of safety (bouncers, etc.) [/quote] I have friends who work in strip clubs in Philadelphia who get paid large amounts cash by sub men to act out fantasies in a private room. Example: one who knows I'm a sub told me that she has a regular who pays her $500 to kick him in the "jewels" and verbally humiliate him. (For $500, I would have kicked him :). Another has a regular who pays to have his nipples abused. Another has a cross-dresser who comes in to have his pantyhose admired. For whatever reason, these men feel safer in that environment than going to a Pro Domme, and the dancer has a group of bouncers watching her back.

MisPandora -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/21/2007 4:38:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lockmeupplease Example: one who knows I'm a sub told me that she has a regular who pays her $500 to kick him in the "jewels" and verbally humiliate him. (For $500, I would have kicked him :). Another has a regular who pays to have his nipples abused. Another has a cross-dresser who comes in to have his pantyhose admired. For whatever reason, these men feel safer in that environment than going to a Pro Domme, and the dancer has a group of bouncers watching her back. It's not necessarily that the men feel safer -- they feel it's more legitimate. It's a licensed business. These are closeted guys who are barely dealing with their kinks as is. A strip club is generally an acceptable cover to coworkers as well as a wife or girlfriend, and they've got an alibi -- they were really in a strip club. I operated a dungeon out in Manayunk back in the late 90s. I was dating a dancer at the time (totally vanilla) and she'd bring me into the bar to meet some of her customers that were asking for freaky stuff that she wanted no parts of. Quite frankly, alot of it was offensive and inappropriate in the environment they were requesting it, and trust me, many of those boys paid for being filthy perverts with no manners for forcing their kinks on unsuspecting women! Anyhow, I found myself recruiting from the dancer ranks there because so many of them doing far more than dancing. They were pulling outcall sessions in hotels and worse, at these guy's apartments or their own pads and risking getting themselves hurt going out on their own. There were two that were particularly good. They pulled a very peculiar clientele from those establishments. Never heavy SM stuff -- usually foot boys, trampling guys, panty boys or things like that. They'd latch onto them and create the addiction at the club, then lure them into long sessions without the restrictions at the playspace. These ladies were simply monopolizing on the positive cash flow.

eponastar -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/21/2007 2:04:01 PM)
Thank you ladies! Your words of wisdom will be heeded. I have been searching my area for a lawyer. No luck so far. I have been able to aquire a small amount of toys and I am aware of the handling and care of these impliments. As for a CPA, I can't really afford one. I figured I would write up my own biz plan as suggessted. Like I said, I am trying to finance my education. even if it is a couple hundred here and there. In this day and age every little bit counts. Thanks agian ladies for all of your advice! It will definantly be benificial. One last question, anyone know of any 'houses' in the SE Michigan area?

JordanNYC -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/22/2007 12:40:48 PM)
The first house I worked at, emailed me. The house I'm at now, I emailed them. It's not hard, or formal. You're not going to be filling out applications or need a resume.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: A question for the Pro (12/22/2007 1:16:44 PM)
There are no houses here in SE Michigan. There are escort services aplenty, though, so you might want to check out the Metro Times and see if they will hire someone to do non-sex domination. Also, maxfisch.com has listings of most of the websites, just do a Michigan search. Not sure how current the listing is , I swear mine was up the last time I checked and the site has been down for years.

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