Why Dommes judge people based on grammar?

Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (Full Version)

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falccon -> Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 8:50:51 PM)
Grammar=Intelligence I noticed alot of reponses from people who equate the two.If the grammar,punction and spelling are poor,the person is illiterate.Give me a break.True some responses are ill conceived and poorly structured,but a little leeway should be exercised. Has it come some of the people's attention there are brilliant people,but are poor at English.Surprise,surprise. I'm famaliar with a university math professor who admits his weakness,grammar,but he is superb in math.I'm not the greatest in English either,I'm a math nerd,love calculus,but that doesn't make me any smarter or dumber than anyone else. The condemnation I see is abhorant and all too famaliar.One of my favorite authors is William Faulkner, a great in the literature world.I haven't seen anyone on these posts come close to his mastery of writing, but these same people are the biggest critics of English structure. I feel that some of the subs should be given a chance to impress and show some of their other fine qualities and strengths.

MsLadySue -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 8:58:04 PM)
I suspect the condemnation of poor spelling and grammar are due to those who see no excuse for it since computers have spelling/grammar checkers. If one wishes to make a good first impression then perhaps it would be worth while to take a few extra minutes to compose the original email in word, use the spelling/grammar checker then copy and paste it to the recipient.

Najakcharmer -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:02:33 PM)
If articulation and skill with words and verbal expression is high on someone's list of attractive qualities, then someone who does not have that particular quality is probably out of luck. Some women prefer redheads; others prefer English majors. It isn't usually productive to tell someone who likes redheads to give a brunette a chance, if that's a hardwired preference.

sammiebabygirl -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:04:27 PM)
It's not just Dommes that do this. I personally have a very hard time understanding why anyone would continuously write with incorrect grammar, punctuation and spelling. It is totally unnecessary when there are things like spell and grammar check available. If you know that you have a weakness in a certain area and there are resources available to help, which you do not use, it says to me that you are either lazy or do not care. Remember, you only get one chance to make a first impression. jen

darchChylde -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:07:20 PM)
it has nothing to do with dommes in partcular, but especially with an on-line medium; your words are generally your first (and often only) impression... just look at this message here, i get my ideas and opinions out clearly; but it also doesn't look very neat i know this and have always known this, while on certainous subjects i will post with proper capitalization and punctuation; this is my writing style, it has been since i was writing pen and ink poetry in highschool and i use it to differentiate from different subjects and take extra care when i want my audience to take particular attention in my opinion, sloppy typing or writing in an online medium is akin to going to a funeral with stained jeans and dirt under your fingernails; it's a good idea to adjust your appearance to your environment now i shall wait for flames [:D] edited to add: Wow, it looks like i took way too much time typing this. I'm just repeating what was already said.

LadyPact -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:08:25 PM)
Actually, this is a habit I do have in general, when I know someone by written word only. It goes back to that being their only communication with Me. Those who meet Me/know Me in person, oddly enough, I back off on that. If you have ever seen My boy's posts, it would be obvious. At times, he gets excited about his assignments and forgets to use the spell checker.

Daddysredhead -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:09:46 PM)
I don't care which side of the proverbial leash you are on, if you trying to make a good first impression, and all you have is the written word, you would do well to take care in creating the message before you send it. All of us make grammatical errors from time to time, or perhaps our fingers get ahead of our thoughts. It does happen. However, continuously writing PM's of any length that look like my Thing 1 or Thing 2 wrote it, isn't going to fly very far with me. I do not expect subs, bottoms, Tops, Dom/mes, etc. to diagram a sentence for me (although that could be an interesting kink), however, please take a little time when you write. I try to do the same, just out of courtesy to the intended reader. As I tell the Things, do your best, don't be messy, and put some thought into what you write. You never get a second chance at a first impression, as they say.

Kumasan2 -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:15:01 PM)
There's a difference between writing conversationally and writing poorly. Writing conversationally, I may not pay strict attention to where every comma is or whether or not I used who/whom correctly. But what I do try to do is spell well and come across with a level of intelligence that a potential sub will see and hopefully respond to. Frankly, if she didn't respond to correct spelling and reasonably good grammar I probably wouldn't be interested in her. It isn't just Dommes, as others have said.

ShaktiSama -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:23:02 PM)
I would really hate to see anyone try to imitate Faulker on a message board. Some of his novels would choke a horse. [:D] As to why grammar and spelling count on the Internet--I guess for the same reason that looks and personal grooming count at a singles bar. It's your first impression, you only get one chance to make it, so you might want to make sure that when you approach someone, you've taken a shower recently and you don't have a giant barbecue sauce stain on your tie. I agree that this medium is not the best way to meet people if you are not able to communicate well by typing a message. A singles bar may not be the best way to meet people if you don't have any fashion sense. And calling in to a telephone dating line might not be your best best, if you have Tourettes Syndrome. We all have our little crosses to bear...

KindLadyGrey -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:28:50 PM)
I don't think most Dommes here go over messages with a red pencil. A typo here of a spelling error there or a comma splice where ever are not going to be a big deal. I don't expect people to have perfect grammar, but I do expect them not to be lazy when composing a message to me. There is a big difference between someone who is simply not the best writer and someone who obviously has not taken the time and effort to compose a meaningful and coherent message. Generally speaking, we can tell the difference. I've also noticed here on the forums that ESOL speakers tend to get made fun of or chastised simply because people don't realize the cause of the awkward grammar/spelling is a result of that. I always cut ESOL speakers a lot of slack. . .after all, if my intelligence were judged on my ability to compose a coherent message in German (the only other language I speak), I would be on the short bus too! I think what most of us really want to avoid are messages like the following: "i like ur profile u want to chat?" (Annoying internet chat speak) "i am sub in pa looking for dominate woman to teach me i am a naughty boy i have money and can come to you if you want to collar me please send me a reply i am looking forward to hearing from you mistress" (unpunctuated run on gibberish) I am a teacher, and I do consider good verbal and writing skills to be very attractive, but if a message is thoughtful and the sender has obviously taken the time to attempt to conform to the rules of modern english (capitalizing the beginning of a sentence, using punctuation, using standard spelling and not internet shorthand, etc) I won't automatically rule them out just because their actual grammar and spelling is bad. Just make sure, if you know writing is a weakness of yours, that the content of your message is interesting and intelligent enough to compensate.

VeryCurious07 -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 9:30:24 PM)
While I can't speak to the psyche of a female Dom, I can say that research shows that almost universally, women are attracted to intelligent men. Now, I am not going to say that poor typing skills on a forum mean that a person is a babbling idiot, in a text based medium such as this, the style a person posts in is about all that another member can use to evaluate his/her intelligence. I can't honestly blame women, whether dom, sub or vanilla if they are turned off by people who type inarticulate half words without viable sentence structure or semi-coherent punctuation. While I don't think anyone is expceting PhD dissertation level writing here, it makes sense that anyone would be more attractive in a text based message forum who had better than rudimentary grasp of basic writing skills. ;)

AllietheKitten -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 10:16:49 PM)
Ditto to what Very Curious said-intelligence and wit are at the top of my list. And what way do I have to judge intelligence online? The quality of conversation, which includes (by its written nature) spelling and grammar.

slavekal -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 10:19:51 PM)
I am a sub male, and that is a sore spot for me. I can accept informal languge, but some people write like they never went to school at all. And use a dictionary. The original poster used a word that he didn't know how to spell. Why didn't he look it up? The word is ABHORRENT, not ABHORANT.

ElaineSubmits -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 10:24:47 PM)
Certainly grammar is an imperfect measure of intelligence. Syntax, vocabulary and general articulateness are much more revealing. All of those generally go together though. I don't think it's really so much a matter of people assuming that poor grammar equals poor intelligence. I think people are assuming that poor grammar implies sloppiness, indifference, and a lack of respect for the person receiving the message. It's widely assumed that when making initial contacts, we are trying to present ourselves at our best, so if our best isn't very impressive, people will decide they don't want to see our worst.

Aylee -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 10:28:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: falccon Grammar=Intelligence I noticed alot of reponses from people who equate the two.If the grammar,punction and spelling are poor,the person is illiterate.Give me a break.True some responses are ill conceived and poorly structured,but a little leeway should be exercised. Because that is what illiterate means. il·lit·er·ate (ĭ-lĭt'ər-ĭt) adj. Unable to read and write. Having little or no formal education. Marked by inferiority to an expected standard of familiarity with language and literature. Violating prescribed standards of speech or writing. Marked by inferiority to an expected standard of familiarity with language and literature. Violating prescribed standards of speech or writing. Ignorant of the fundamentals of a given art or branch of knowledge: musically illiterate. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/illiterate One other note: The long key at the bottom of your qwerty board is called the space bar. Learn how to use it. While I do not care for Faulkner, I will point out that he had editors. Those on the boards do not.

slavekal -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 10:31:47 PM)
Also.....A LOT is two words.

hardbodysub -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 10:35:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama I would really hate to see anyone try to imitate Faulker on a message board. Some of his novels would choke a horse. [:D] As to why grammar and spelling count on the Internet--I guess for the same reason that looks and personal grooming count at a singles bar. It's your first impression, you only get one chance to make it, so you might want to make sure that when you approach someone, you've taken a shower recently and you don't have a giant barbecue sauce stain on your tie. I agree that this medium is not the best way to meet people if you are not able to communicate well by typing a message. A singles bar may not be the best way to meet people if you don't have any fashion sense. And calling in to a telephone dating line might not be your best best, if you have Tourettes Syndrome. We all have our little crosses to bear... Damn, ShaktiSama, we actually agree on this. What's the world coming to?

sammiebabygirl -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 11:09:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KindLadyGrey "i like ur profile u want to chat?" (Annoying internet chat speak) I just got a message on the other side, from an interested Dom, who writes like what we are talking about here. I directed him to this thread. LOL jen

sammiebabygirl -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 11:17:51 PM)
Here is his response to my directing him here. "I just try to go to the site, but i couldn't get throw.... But tell me wat i might wanna know ?" [sm=ofcourse.gif] jen

VeryCurious07 -> RE: Why Dommes judge people based on grammar? (1/1/2008 11:19:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slavekal I am a sub male, and that is a sore spot for me. I can accept informal languge, but some people write like they never went to school at all. And use a dictionary. The original poster used a word that he didn't know how to spell. Why didn't he look it up? The word is ABHORRENT, not ABHORANT. While I agree with the spirit of your post, I don't agree with the idea that one should have perfect spelling and grammar. I believe it is important to have coherent and comprehensible usage of the language, but this is, after all, a message forum, not an institution of higher learning. What I was referring to was not the mis-spelling of a word like abhorrent, but when people type in l33t or completely chaotic gibberish. By the way, if you don't know what l33t is, consider your IQ to be raised 20 points for the blissful ignorance. Look, there's a huge difference between firing off a message board post which is moronic drivel and one with a mis-spell here, an imporoper comma or semicolon there, a few too many adverbs or other common mistakes. My point is that this is a forum for entertainment and community, not a NASA or MENSA proving ground with a shit load of pedantic grammar police ready to pounce on your casual post with the fervor of your twelfth grade teacher. ;)

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