"Learning" Pain (Full Version)

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tavinia -> "Learning" Pain (1/1/2008 11:51:07 PM)

Does anyone have suggestions on how to "learn" pain? 
 
Until recently, i would have said that it was not arousing; now i am finding that some types of pain please my body greatly.  What i am unsure of is how best to grow in this area?  Are there "tricks" to making the pain easier to bear, and do they differ with different types of pain?




Einzelganger -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 1:28:02 AM)

I'm not sure if this works for everyone, but it works for me, so I thought I'd post it here.

Picture your body in your mind; not the outward appearance, but the skin, nervous system, etc.  That pain being inflicted on you...it doesn't hurt; your sensory nerves are simply telling you it hurts.  It's not physically damaging your body, so imagine it as though you're distancing yourself from it, or ignoring the pain messages altogether.  If you picture your mind being a separate entity from your body, it makes it easier to ignore any pain or damage to your physical form.  I know this sounds really stupid and pointless, but it does the trick in my case...your results may vary. *smiles*

-Einzelgänger




nephandi -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 2:57:40 AM)

Hi

Deep breathing and trying to relax make pain more easy to bear. If you know some meditation techniques that might help as well. Also it is important to take things slow. If you manage to relax and find small amounts of pain enjoyable then you can move on to the next level. But you need to feel safe and secure and if the point are to teach you to enjoy it then you should not rush.

Now for some they get sexual arousal out of pain, it is just how they are built, this one can learn, but it means to program your mind so it will take time and allot of patience. One way to do it is to apply small levels of pain at the same time as sexual stimulation, if this is done enough times it will link the two in your head. Just the same as a special perfume make you think of your mother or the taste of strawberries draw fort a childhood memory.

i wish you well




sunshinemiss -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 4:49:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: nephandi

Hi

Deep breathing and trying to relax make pain more easy to bear. If you know some meditation techniques that might help as well. Also it is important to take things slow. If you manage to relax and find small amounts of pain enjoyable then you can move on to the next level. But you need to feel safe and secure and if the point are to teach you to enjoy it then you should not rush.

Now for some they get sexual arousal out of pain, it is just how they are built, this one can learn, but it means to program your mind so it will take time and allot of patience. One way to do it is to apply small levels of pain at the same time as sexual stimulation, if this is done enough times it will link the two in your head. Just the same as a special perfume make you think of your mother or the taste of strawberries draw fort a childhood memory.

i wish you well



exactly true.
Also, i imagine the pain like a light that travels THROUGH my body and my job is only to be there as it moves.  It's rather like walking through a spray of water, only i stand still and a light shower goes past me.

peace




nephandi -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 6:14:42 AM)

Hi

Seeing pain that way it can also be used as a powerful Spiritual tool, one can channel the pain towards a goal as one would Energy, it becomes Energy in a very raw from, if you are into that kind of thing off course.

i wish you well




grlneedstolearn -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 8:03:06 AM)

i don't really think that pain is having to do with actually learning it, but instead it comes naturally to some people and others it doesn't suit them. i'm getting used to the pain and can sometimes enjoy it, depending on the situation.
  As far as making the pain easier to bear, try going into a "happy place" and not focus totally on the pain that you will recieve.




TMaster2 -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 9:24:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Also, i imagine the pain like a light that travels THROUGH my body and my job is only to be there as it moves.  It's rather like walking through a spray of water, only i stand still and a light shower goes past me.


wow, very well said -- I like that description!




toservez -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/2/2008 9:43:35 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

i don't really think that pain is having to do with actually learning it, but instead it comes naturally to some people and others it doesn't suit them. i'm getting used to the pain and can sometimes enjoy it, depending on the situation.
  As far as making the pain easier to bear, try going into a "happy place" and not focus totally on the pain that you will recieve.


I agree with this. I have always just concentrated on knowing it makes my Master happy and doing this shows my devotion. Visual of seeing my Master enjoy himself and/or get aroused by the pain he is inflicting on me I have found also goes a long way.

I have also found the atmosphere that pain is inflicted on me to be critical. When done in a quite demanding and clearly dominating way I can take much more and get aroused greatly at the time but power is my fetish. When done casually and matter of fact in nature it becomes a much tougher thing for me to get through.




undefined -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 9:04:10 AM)

Here's a trick one of my owners taught me while she was inflicting some surprisingly painful nipple torture on me:

Picture the pain in your body as a bright intense red color, against a more cooler color in the parts of your body not in pain. Then imagine that red spreading throughout your body where it becomes diluted in the cooler colors. It's the concept of spreading the pain out equally across your body to lessen it, but actually picturing it like this helps some. Though to be completely honest, I passed out a moment later. But at least it wasn't hurting before then!

Hehe, seriously though. If you concentrate enough on that, it should help. And to be fair, I hadn't drank enough water that evening. ;)




rapunzel2 -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 9:33:56 AM)

I suppose it depends on what your Dom is willing to do, but I found my enjoyment of pain increases as my arousal increases.  I have done better when it starts slow and gradual and becomes more intense over time.  Something about sexual arousal alters the sensation and what would have been painful at first becomes enjoyable in the height of passion.  I am not what is called a "pain slut" however, and pain in itself as of yet, has not been a turn on for me    




littleone35 -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 10:23:34 AM)

Wow the only thing i have learned about pain is i don't like it.

Matt's littleone





DominicsJoy -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 10:43:20 AM)

Not all of us are pain sluts. Not all of us need a high degree or any degree of pain to "get off". I prefer an edge of pain, it keeps me focused. I use it to motivate and drive myself to new heights, (and Master knows it all too well). So instead of traveling beyond the pain and leaving it behind, I embrace it and enjoy the difference in sensations Master offers to me. He varies the feelings I receive and I never know if a strike with a cane might be coming or a caress with rabbit fur. It makes me alert to the extreme, my nerves and body jumping for every instant of his touch. I do not seek to escape the feelings, but enjoy them. We are all different and by all means do what works for you both.

Master's girl- joy




Lenina -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 11:58:17 AM)

First I would say to try and relax. A lot of times, if you see the knife coming, you'll psych yourself out and it will hurt more.

Personally, I prefer sharp pain (knives, needles, branding, etc.) to dull pains (Floggers, paddles, etc.)

Just find what's right for you.




his0rayne -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 6:52:22 PM)

I just relax and breathe through it.  I am not a huge pain person but I am getting better.




NLitendLady -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 8:05:28 PM)

 Also using classical conditioning, I was taught to eroticize pain. While receiving some stimulation that was pleasurable and turned me on immeasurably, such as clitoral stimulation; I was at the same time exposed to pain but told to focus on the pleasure and try to focus only on it. After doing this many times, the pain began to trigger an erotic and pleasurable response in my clitoris as well as other areas. It worked well for me as well as many others.  I enjoy the pain because I can eroticize it.  However, I do at times, want pain for pain's sake and no other reason, for catharsis, for cleansing, for release. Pain can take me to a spiritual plane.

You need to embrace the pain, take it deep within you and breathe slowly and deeply let it work through you, ride the waves and go with it.
There's my two cents and what worked for me.  Here are two quotes I feel appropriate.

"Go with the pain, let it take you...Open your palms and your body to the pain. It comes in waves, and you must be open as vessel lying on the beach, letting it fill you up and then, retreating, leaving you empty and clear - with a deep breath - it has to be as deep as the pain- one reaches a kind of inner freedom from the pain, as though the pain were not yours but your body's. The spirit lays the body on the altar."         ~     Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Lay the body on the altar of trust. Embrace the pain as it dances with your soul to the pounding rhythms of pain and pleasure. Suffer the body so the spirit may soar. ~LR~




trusting -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/3/2008 9:19:06 PM)

the way that i am able to deal with pain is to think of something else totally... i normally think of how pleased he will be with me once he is through.

as for the difference in pain... there is no doubt a difference in pain! the best way to deal with pain in general is to be somewhere else in your mind, as if it is not happening.




breatheasone -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/4/2008 10:32:54 AM)

I personally haven't had the pleasure of finding any "tricks" or anything...pain quite simply HURTS, and its supposed to. I mean if pain didnt hurt then whats the point? For me the thing is all the stuff that comes WITH the pain....




littlebitxxx -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/4/2008 12:26:07 PM)

I don't know if there is such a thing as 'learning' pain, but it can come easier with practice.  The different types will probably cause different sensations in you and different reactions so the need to know which are good and which are not so good is pretty important.  Finding a Top/Dom that is experienced in inflicting various pains would benefit as he could lead you through.  Like nephandi, I find pain stimulus to be quite a spiritual thing.  I take it in, process and absorb it and make it part of me.  As the pain increases or changes, I grow stronger for it.  Once the level reaches saturation point, it is no longer pain but just overall stimulus and I'm like a 5'2" receptacle filled to the brim. 

I don't think there are any tricks to learning to enjoy pain.  Seeing as how you have already found that some feels good or causes arousal, you are on your way.  You may not become a total pain slut and that's okay.  Enjoy what you get and realize you aren't afraid of it...experiment to find what works for you.  Above all, have fun.  Hugs to ya.




CdnExplorer -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/4/2008 2:18:41 PM)

Pain doesn't have to be arousing to be pleasurable. I'm not wired that way and I still enjoy a good beating heh. First there's the control aspect of it. When the pain spikes...well, it's pain. It isn't something that I'd do to myself, but having it inflicted upon me greatly increases the feeling I have of being controlled. Oddly this goes even more so when it's something I'm consenting to, because I'm essentially bending my will to that of another. After each new pain sensation peaks it spreads out in kind of a warm glow, which I find relaxing. A bit like meditation really because of how my attention becomes entirely consumed. Then there's the 24 to 48 hours after where I'm so relaxed that I feel like my face could fall right off.

How you think of the entire experience can change your perception of it. Realizing the things I mentioned above led me from thinking I didn't have any masochism in me at all to discovering my inner pain slut. I don't really have any tricks to manage the pain per se, at least not in this kind of context. My natural reaction is to tense up, particularly in my core, and change my breathing. That's almost entirely out of my control though. When it comes to longer term pain, such as those from major injuries, I discovered I was able to convince myself that I felt no pain. This even worked when I had an arm injury so bad that codeine did nothing for me. Mental tricks like that might work when the pain is gradual and constant, or the spikes come at very regular intervals.




tavinia -> RE: "Learning" Pain (1/4/2008 10:28:24 PM)

Thank you to everyone who responded; you have given me much to ponder.




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