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LadyHugs -> RE: Training for another (1/4/2008 4:35:04 PM)
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Dear zimmeron, Ladies and Gentlemen;
I am all for education, training and sharing. However, those Dominants who pass on their slave/submissive/servant onto others I have my 'red' and 'yellow' flags up about.
Being a Dominant/Master/Mistress--is taking on the responsibilities of the submissive, slave and or servant. The petition for a collar was to that Master, not us--on the outside of the relationship. As a slave/submissive being passed to another Master would put my hair in a knot and build resentment because of the emotions of basicly being cast off to another--not having the undivided attention of the 'Master' to whom promised to train me (as a slave). IF 'said' Master claimed he would train me and cast me off to another--I'd be asking for release immediately. Has no business screwing me up as a slave when he doesn't know how to be a Master. I am not a purchase at 'Slaves R Us.'
I realize not all Dominants are 'trainers.' However, this is when the Dominant needs to be trained by fellow Masters--to see through their eyes, see as far as judgement goes and learn other skills if some are lacking, e.g. bondage, S&M, management, etc.
Like others have mentioned--training would be in your style and taint the slave in that way. I've seen men get 'odd' when things go wrong, blame the other guy who trained the slave for them and when the slave goes into the performance of the trainer--well; its everybody's fault but theirs syndrome.
Teaching equestrians and training horses, I teach the equestrian how to feel their horse and translate the horse's silient language as to communicate and become a partnership. I also would recommend be the teacher to them both and help them in their discovery.
My personal recommendation would be, to sit down with this Dominant friend of yours and create an outline of how things he wants things to happen in his home and or relationship. Make a checklist if you will. [Note: There is a copy of an excerpt from The Manual-How to give service in the forum topic of 'contracts' which has negotiation check list that might help create your own-- Search engine in FORUMS and type author LadyHugs and should be on the 3rd page]. Establish protocols if you wish. Each Master may wish their own so Master to Master talk and see what protocols he likes to follow, create, etc.
Training can be broad or narrowed to a specific aspect of D/s and or M/s. If you are asked to train in a specific area--then keep it narrowed and focused on that specific area.
Training with him, making him involved and make a decision is the best advice I can offer.
Master Taino's Training Academy and Butchman's Training Academy (sometimes spelled Butchmann's) give weekend intense trainings that work on the art of Mastering. These may be considerations as well as looking into Master-slave conferences, attending workshops and interact with others who are interested in the M/s or D/s relationship.
Just some thoughts.
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
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