RE: Would you wait on a sub while...

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 8:58:56 AM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
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Pixie - I am so sorry to hear about your loss... I have gone through the same thing and know the utter despair and pain that can accompany the loss of one so deeply loved. May you find strength... And remember (to paraphrase Khalil Gibran), that which you weep for is also that which brought you joy.... May you remember the joy.

And you are worth the wait.

peace

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 9:02:44 AM

MissHarlet

Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
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Hugggggggggggs ... and she is not gone ... only " away"

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 10:14:32 AM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
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As a pet owner I know how it feels to loose one of your furkids. My eldest had a stroke back in late November and I had to have him put down, he was 14 years old. It hurts just as if a person had died and it takes time to work through the grief. As a person, petowner and Domme I understand this and yes I would give a submissive time to work through their greiving period no matter how long it was.

The one thing we have to keep in mind is that no matter what your "label" we are all still human beings and things such as death will throw us for a loop. We need someone to lean on and understand who better than your Dominant/submissive? Take your time, heal and move forward when your ready, thats my two cents.

~Lashra

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 10:43:05 AM

rubberpet

Posts: 1743
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: The Land of Voodoo
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When Mistress lost Her beloved pet, I could easily empathize because I had to put my beautiful German Shepherd down because of cancer. Mistress brings out the most tender and compassionate feelings in me, so when I heard the pain in Her voice, I couldn't console Her enough. I was feeling Her pain. I did the best I could from a thousand miles away.

On top of that, She has been going through a few serious issues in Her life (including Her pet's death), so the D/s side has been put on hold for a while. I can't blame Her for that. She's human and can only deal with so much at one time. The D/s thing is great, but it can be put on hold for more important things. While it's a major part of my life, She is infinitely more important and Her getting things back on track is what matters most.

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 10:51:34 AM

Shawn1066

Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave

Would you wait on a sub while he or she was getting over the loss of a pet or loved one?

There'd be no point in having an Owner if she wasn't there for me when things got rough.

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 10:57:34 AM

RoughFN

Posts: 197
Joined: 7/26/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Shawn1066

quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave

Would you wait on a sub while he or she was getting over the loss of a pet or loved one?

There'd be no point in having an Owner if she wasn't there for me when things got rough.

Well put.

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Post #: 26

RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 11:57:44 AM

ocilla

Posts: 1764
Joined: 6/12/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave

quote:

But if you mean keeping possibilities open with them for when or if they're ready, then yes. If I've an interest in them as a sub or as a friend or both, then I'd certainly not blow them off because they weren't immediately available for some real reason. Life happens and keeps happening.

If I like someone I like them. Rather than ending contact I'd be offering condolences if there was a tragedy and continuing our relationship as is appropriate for us.

Yes, this is more like what I was talking about; keeping the possibilities open and doing things with them as friends if the situation were such that it was appropriate; to help keep the doors open and the communication going between the two of you. In doing so, you'd be slowly building the friendship on which to base a relationship later on.

I am not the type to just write folks off even though at times perhaps I should. I feel once a connection is made between myself and another that it is worth fostering and allowing it the opportunity to gather whatever is needed to grow organically and comfortably. My gut instincts are really good about people and I do not often feel a special connection so I do cherish and nurture the relationship and allow it to become what it is meant to be...with this approach at times I discover that the connection is not meant to be sexual but has other important ways of being intimate and close. It is always a journey with lots of blind curves on the path.

Of course on one level I may desire to push on but it takes two to create intimacy and if one person is not ready or capable then no amount of pushing, forcing etc will make it happen.

And I am unlikely to put all my eggs in one basket. I will remain open to a person but I will also remain open to others as well.

Pixel, I am sorry to hear about your dear pup. The grief for a pet is unique and raw imo.

I also had not realised that you and Majik had gone your separate ways of late. So I offer encouragement and hugs to you to manage well and wade through all the many changes that have come your way of late.

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Nature is not a place to visit. It is home.
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It takes a kinky village...

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Post #: 27

RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 12:31:38 PM

chiaThePet

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

Well pix, I guess the only thing left here to offer you is,

my condolences on the loss of your Dear Tabitha.

chia* (the pet)

Thanks chia. That wasn't what I was looking for in starting this thread, but I appreciate the condolences just the same. Her loss was very sudden and totally unexpected. I didn't learn she was terminally ill until the Sunday before Christmas. Her illness progressed very rapidly, with me having to put her down 2 weeks later when it was clear that it was time for her to go, despite my desire for her to stay.

I held her as she crossed over to find the peace and comfort she greatly deserved. I know that one day, she'll come running to greet me when she sees me arrive at "The Rainbow Bridge" to take her with me and journey further.

To avoid hijaaking my own thread, I'd like to thank everyone for the many kinds thoughts and well wishes which have been sent in my direction. It was never my intent for this thread to become about my losing Tabitha. Just the same, she was a wonderful companion who was always there for me and will always be with me in my heart.

- pixel

Well pix, ha! Since when do posters get what they want here at the collarme hive?

As you have seen, many hearts here soar well beyond title and intent, venturing
into the memories and emotions of parallels known. Sometimes a hijacked
vessel washes up on a beautiful shore, and there, all may find comfort.

chia* (the pet)

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 12:32:51 PM

GoddessTeaze

Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave
Would you wait on a sub while he or she was getting over the loss of a pet or loved one?
- pixel

When ever I meet one who touches Me, then I'm there for that person, no matter what.

Life aint all about roses, how much Wwe all would want that. But that's not true.

So you would know My answer already wouldn't you littleone?

Sending you bigg huggz and light.

GoddezzT`

< Message edited by GoddessTeaze -- 1/11/2008 12:33:38 PM >

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 12:56:14 PM

ocilla

Posts: 1764
Joined: 6/12/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet
Well pix, ha! Since when do posters get what they want here at the collarme hive?

As you have seen, many hearts here soar well beyond title and intent, venturing
into the memories and emotions of parallels known. Sometimes a hijacked
vessel washes up on a beautiful shore, and there, all may find comfort.

chia* (the pet)

SWOOoooonnnnn

Chia, you do have such a lovely way about you.

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Nature is not a place to visit. It is home.
~ Gary Snyder

It takes a kinky village...

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/11/2008 4:40:50 PM

PhoenixRed

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Joined: 10/7/2007
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Pixel, I'm so sorry for your loss. When I lost one of my dogs unexpectedly, it was extremely hard to deal with. He was quite young. I was glad I had good friends to help me through it. Took a long time to resolve the grief and concentrate on the years he did enrich my life and appreciate having had him for that time. My other dog is 13 now, and I have to accept that I may not have many more years with him. I know I will have my mate and friends to help me through that time. I hope I also have my subs to help me through it as well.

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/12/2008 1:54:25 AM

MissOchistic

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I would wait and try to be a good friend to them, myself. I guess if weeks went by and it was still up in the air, I'd be open with other people as well, but I wouldn't write them off or forget them.

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RE: Would you wait on a sub while... - 1/14/2008 3:04:40 PM

lateralist1

Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
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Yes I'd wait.
In fact I have done at least twice.
Staying in the background but availble to talk when necessary.
Even though the relationships didn't work out I am still glad that I did so.

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Post #: 33