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RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 9:44:45 AM

ItzKat

Posts: 86
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline

When I first joined this board, I posted in a way that I thought was clear that I have a partner and I am not interested in "meeting" others. However, I was swamped with messages asking if I wanted to meet and play.

At first I was very flattered and I tried to answer each one. Then I began to grow annoyed that the men were not taking the time to read my profile. Again, looking to what I could do to make things better, I changed my profile to make my status clear.
That didn't seem to help. I still recieved emails and chat requests. I started only answering the polite ones and left the rude or vulger ones alone.

Those that I did answer mostly got the message but some were down right insistant and became rude when I continued to say no. That crossed a line for me. I have way too much time in the local scene and know way too many fine, respectful people involved here to need contact from those rude enough to try to push me into meeting.

I made a journal entry that flatly said I will not respond to messages unless someone was asking for or provided local scene information and I have not had to deal with unwanted messages since.

You imply that to be a good sub or slave I must be polite and respectful... well, honey that goes both ways doesn't it. Just because a dominant sends an email to a submissive, does not mean the submissive is bound by some code to reply. Respect should be shown by all involved here.

Kat

(in reply to maitreabsolu)

Post #: 21

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 10:02:56 AM

JohnWarren

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wills

why dont some people answer their messages, even if , or especially if, you are not interested? a simple ' no thanks' would do ?being a sub or a slave starts by being polite and respecting others ??

I've read all the posts concerning this topic on this page,and i understand all of your reasons for replying unto your messages or not,and everyone is definetly entitled to their own opinions

Given paragraph 2 I suspect you already know the answer to what you posed in paragraph 1

quote:

i message submissives' and slaves',and i do so respectably,but i believe less than half of em bother to reply,i guess maybe it's cuz i'm old, i'm 55, but in my opinion i believe it is just plain flat out rude not to reply to someone who messages you,i answer all mail i receive,but it is seldom i receive any mail

~Wills

I'm a lot older than you, and I'd say a large majority of the people I write to respond. If you read the "grammar" (sic) notestream you might develop another hypothesis.

However, my feeling is people respond to that email that interests them. The sender's need doesn't create a co-responding duty in them.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to Wills)

Post #: 22

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 10:17:23 AM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

NO NO NO! You spelled "grammar" correctly. How dare you! It's "grammer."

quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

If you read the "grammar" (sic) notestream you might develop another hypothesis.

(in reply to JohnWarren)

Post #: 23

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 10:59:15 AM

JohnWarren

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

NO NO NO! You spelled "grammar" correctly. How dare you! It's "grammer."

quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

If you read the "grammar" (sic) notestream you might develop another hypothesis.

Damn, I can't misspell even when I want to [bad, John, bad bad]

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 24

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 9:11:45 PM

sarbonn

Posts: 203
Joined: 3/23/2004
Status: offline

Sometimes someone writes you a message and you're just left staring blankly at the computer screen because you haven't a clue what to answer. So you just delete the message and move on. I've done that a few times because someone has sent me an email message that seemed more interested in touching a nerve than it felt like an attempt at communicating, so I've just deleted the message and went on with my day. Every now and then that person takes it personally because they thought they were sending something of importance that interpreted in a completely different way. Then they bring it up in regular message board channels, so you end up having to defend why you just ignored a bizarre email when you really don't remember half of what was in it in the first place.

_____________________________

Give a man a fish, he eats for a day...
...teach a man to fish, he steals your fishing hole and then charges you for the fish.

(in reply to maitreabsolu)

Post #: 25

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 9:24:29 PM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

Sometimes someone writes you a message and you're just left staring blankly at the computer screen because you haven't a clue what to answer.

Oh yes, I have been there before!

Normally I make a mental note to return to the message and leave it in my inbox. There have been a couple times I have had to force myself into saying something, but I try to respond to the meager trickle of messages that I recieve.

(in reply to sarbonn)

Post #: 26

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 8/31/2005 10:13:03 PM

kc692

Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: onceburned

quote:

Sometimes someone writes you a message and you're just left staring blankly at the computer screen because you haven't a clue what to answer.

Oh yes, I have been there before! Normally I make a mental note to return to the message and leave it in my inbox. There have been a couple times I have had to force myself into saying something, but I try to respond to the meager trickle of messages that I recieve.

I cannot believe you receive just a meager trickle!!!!!! I would think it would be very active, smiles...

(in reply to onceburned)

Post #: 27

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/1/2005 12:40:18 AM

lyndseyswallows

Posts: 7
Joined: 2/24/2005
Status: offline

Why should i take the time to reply if you don't take the time to read my profile first?

if i take the trouble to ask people not to send me a message with one line in that says nothing, then if someone send me a message that just says "wud luv to abuse u" then i'm not going to respond.

Let alone the fact that they hobviously haven't bothered to think it through, i mean what sort of reply do they expect to that? "Oh good, here's my address then, can you come round Thursday?" Idiots!

(in reply to kc692)

Post #: 28

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/1/2005 6:55:21 AM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kc692
I cannot believe you receive just a meager trickle!!!!!! I would think it would be very active, smiles...

Oh my gosh! Well thank you. (I wish there was a smilie icon for blushing).

I suppose I would get more mail if I had a full profile or didn't discourage contact with my 'not looking' statement. So the dearth of attention really is my own fault.

(in reply to kc692)

Post #: 29

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/1/2005 11:16:21 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

why dont some people answer their messages, even if , or especially if, you are not interested? a simple ' no thanks' would do ?being a sub or a slave starts by being polite and respecting others ??

We do, sometimes we just do it with the delete function.

Lily

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

(in reply to maitreabsolu)

Post #: 30

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/2/2005 4:39:26 AM

LadyAngelika

Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

quote:

why dont some people answer their messages, even if , or especially if, you are not interested? a simple ' no thanks' would do ?being a sub or a slave starts by being polite and respecting others ??

We do, sometimes we just do it with the delete function.

Lily

Exactly. It's much more polite then many alternatives ;)

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 31

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/2/2005 5:58:16 AM

Dracironsgirl

Posts: 175
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline

i always reply to an email i receive, i believe that is the proper and polite thing to do ...
a showing of respect from me to the sender, ..that they took time out to email me means
i return good form ...at least that's my thoughts on that. thanks =)

_____________________________

~love a Man in control~

(in reply to ItzKat)

Post #: 32

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 7:26:15 AM

Bluetemptation

Posts: 16
Joined: 8/28/2005
From: Germany
Status: offline

I started with answering each mail I got, but after my picture went online I just gave up.
I got about 10 pages worth of mail in my inbox in less than 48 hours, and most of them hadn't read my profile, wanted me to relocate halfway around the globe.... some wrote really annoying crap or acted like I already was their slave, and sometimes around this time I stopped answering all mail, it just wasn't possible anymore ...
I wrote a note to please try again in a few weeks if you were genuine and had read my profile and answered as much as I could,
sometimes with getting really angry

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)

Post #: 33

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 8:13:47 AM

realophelia

Posts: 168
Status: offline

I'm not looking for a relationship and my profile reflects that. I don't get tons and tons of emails, but I do get around ten a day. Most are one liners. Some are nice, some are not. I respond to some of them, but not all. I don't really see anything wrong with that. When I was looking I used to take the initiative and write to Doms who interested me. If they didn't write back, I just assumed they weren't interested or no longer looking. It never upset me at all. Ophelia

_____________________________

"And every one of them words rang true And glowed like burning coal Pouring off of every page Like it was written in my soul..."

(in reply to maitreabsolu)

Post #: 34

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 9:05:57 AM

Evanesce

Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline

I usually answer a first email from someone, but not always the second. Here's an example of an email exchange I simply do not want to bother with.

He: Hi. How are you? I like your profile.

Me: I'm fine, and thank you. (Why should I bother giving him any more if that's all he has to say?)

He: You're welcome. I like that you say you're sadistic.

That was just this morning. At this point, I'm already bored with this guy, and I've no intention of replying to his second email. If he can't put more thought than that into contacting someone, I'm not going to waste my time dragging it out of him.

Denise
the Kaptin's wench

(in reply to realophelia)

Post #: 35

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 1:39:34 PM

Hallittlelolita

Posts: 253
Joined: 8/11/2005
Status: offline

I have had this problem as well ItsKat and they dont comprehend or they choose to ignore it. On my profile you will see no Doms or Dommes and no single man i am looking for friendship with females only as i am owned, collared, and married to my master and they seem not to get the hint

. So that is why i do not reply to messages, guy's and Doms/Dommes.

Sincerely andie and her Master Hal

(in reply to ItzKat)

Post #: 36

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 1:52:48 PM

subkitten32

Posts: 41
Joined: 1/19/2005
Status: offline

I try to reply to all the e-mails I receive, however I ususally do not respond to the rude ones. The one that comes to mind is "OMG You are to fat." Like I didn't know I was fat...hmmmm...

kitten

(in reply to Hallittlelolita)

Post #: 37

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 2:38:23 PM

RainGod

Posts: 230
Joined: 7/11/2005
From: Hendersonville, NC
Status: offline

Dracironsgirl, who is charming and polite as always, posted thusly:

quote:

i always reply to an email i receive, i believe that is the proper and polite thing to do ...
a showing of respect from me to the sender, ..that they took time out to email me means
i return good form

Thank you Dracsgirl! I also believe it is proper to at least be cordial enough to send a reply....

Now I know there are some people who email people without even bothering to read a single word of their profile. I have had this happen to Me.

I also know there are HNG's who will cut copy and paste the same dribblingly stupid email to every female profile they can find, in desparate hopes of getting laid just once. Sad life they lead isn't it?

I can go even further and relate to the boredom and disappointment of opening an email and finding barely one sentence there, badly misspelled, and obviously without any charm or thought put into it. Hell, if someon lacks the imagination to write a simple email, how much imagination can they have in the bedroom?

But here is what I find unacceptable. When I search and find a profile of someone and read every word of it, and I find it reflects what I am looking for, I take time to write them an email. I do not mention the words "kneel, bitch" nor do I include a picture of "My world-famous cock". I write very respectfully, sincerely, and I mention the points of her profile I found interested, and ask questions based on them. I always conclude with 'sincerely,', or 'respectfully'.

After I send an email like that, and I don't get any kind of response, yes I consider that person a rude, unworthy individual who is either too egotistical or too lazy to return corresponence. Such a person isn't anyone I would like to be with, so her not answering is actually an answer within itself.

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)

Post #: 38

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 2:42:23 PM

RainGod

Posts: 230
Joined: 7/11/2005
From: Hendersonville, NC
Status: offline

subkitten posted:

quote:

I try to reply to all the e-mails I receive, however I ususally do not respond to the rude ones. The one that comes to mind is "OMG You are to fat." Like I didn't know I was fat...hmmmm...

Lmao! Yeah... you shoulda responded with... "omg! No shit??? what the hell am I gonna do???? oh, the humanity!!!"

Always remember, hon, you might be fat, but they are mindless retards with tiny dicks. you can always diet, but they're stuck being who they are forever. =)

(in reply to subkitten32)

Post #: 39

RE: please be polite, answer your messages - 9/25/2005 2:45:58 PM

pinkpleasures

Posts: 1114
Status: offline

i'm confused...didn't i just answer this question? Some days i am dim, i admit. So in case i didn't:

AS A PERSONAL CHOICE i respond to all emails twice, even if it's "no ty"; after that it's "block user".

pinkpleasures

_____________________________

(in reply to RainGod)

Post #: 40

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