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RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/20/2008 8:37:10 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
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In my case, I don't give a shit whether she enjoys it or not, but it will probably hurt less if she enjoys it because I know I will be enjoying it...

Okay, here is my patented technique, it isn't fast but it is proven.  First off, you have to get over any mental issues regarding anal, "ooh its dirty" or whatever, that I will leave you to figure out.  When you get close to cumming, have him play with the rim and no more.  Associate your ass with pleasure is the key.  Then, like any skilled lovemaking, you slowly do more as your lover starts to want it more and more.  It might take an hour, it might take a month or more for you to want more than a little teasing while you are cumming. 

Once you move to penetration, finger or otherwise, if you are still hesitant and not yet a full blown anal slut, it is important to pull out before you cum as the minute you cum you are going to realize "shit, he has a finger in my ass and it hurts" even if you were busy grinding down on his finger a minute ago.

Be patient, let your responses rule the timeline.  There is no "right" pace.  When you start begging him to keep it in...or screaming for him to shove it in, welcome to the club!

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
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RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/20/2008 11:38:33 PM   
cherrytorn


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/6/2006
Status: offline
What worked best for me in the beginning was doing it to myself. It's kind of like tickling/hitting/etc yourself, it's less intense. 

(in reply to winterlight)
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RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 4:24:06 AM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Lots of lube and hopefully some nice rimming first! Nothing like an anus tongue bath! ooooooooh



Sounds interesting..She better be fairly flexible so that she can lick her own ass.


You know, you're right. My new Sir hasnt done this to me. Just vice versa. But the vibrating toys are nice and pave the way too.

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 5:20:00 AM   
parttimehotty


Posts: 4002
Joined: 11/19/2007
From: Virginville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

quote:

ORIGINAL: winterlight

what can i do to get over my fear?


Have a couple of glasses of wine and smoke a little weed.   That's what I did the first time ( and a lot of times after  ) and I loved it.  Woohoo for butt love!


Couldn't have said it better myself!  Starting w/small objects is fine, but chances are you'll still be stressed/uptight (no pun intended....well, maybe a little ;).  Have a double shot of whatever your drink of choice is and go from there.

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(in reply to Aileen1968)
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RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 5:39:28 AM   
malloves69


Posts: 913
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline
coming from a submissive male ..anal is awesome  my mistress has me hooked and gawd do i crave it  shes great with her strapons and her fisting me is even better  she does it in such a loving caring way but she is still very aggressive and i gladly bendover for her anytime she is in the mood ...which is usually once or twice a week  nothing to be afraid of here she has trained my ass well and once she fists me that feeling is simply amazing being on the recieving end from a sexy lady can be quite fun indeed ...enjoy  gawd knows i do ...mal ..oh and by the way so does she

(in reply to parttimehotty)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 5:54:49 AM   
corysub


Posts: 1492
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
All the above! Start slow with butt plugs..larger and larger ones and than small dildo...all with plenty of lube.
Start easy and work your way up in size.  My former Mistress worked slow and easy and in a few weeks a
7" strap on dildo felt great!  I would think if you can take 7-8" dildo you can take most penis out there...
Again, all with plenty of lube For a male subbie like me, it is the ultimate submission...and feels great!

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 6:29:15 AM   
Amaros


Posts: 1363
Joined: 7/25/2005
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I think there are very few people who like it when you go straight for the ass, it helps to be relaxed, like after a couple of orgasms achieved the old fashioned way, i.e., alone or with somebody, it'll loosen you up. Also, try after a BM, an impacted BM can be quite uncomfortable I hear.

I would suggest a dildo with balls attached rather than a vibrator, something that isn't going to get stuck if you get too wild, a butt plug, etc. or one of those jelly double dongs that has an articulated core, it's long enough to not get lost and still give you something to grab onto - it will come out eventually, but might be uncomfortable in the meantime, and you don't want to be explaining things at the emergency room unless you're into public humiliation.

Fingers work, clip your nails, wear vinyl gloves and use plenty of lube, vinyl is very smooth some women are turned on by the feel of vinyl itself I've found, and it makes it easier to maintain proper hygiene, as you can just strip the glove if you need to do something else.

I always caution to take it slow, allow youself to get used to it, it's not a race, but I've known women who prefer to have it shoved right in. Why it's probobly best to take some time to learn your own responses, because unlike the vagina, where the same approach works more or less the same for everybody, the ass is more personal, and there seems to be a wider variety of personal preferences pertaining to it's desecration.

There are a lot of tutorials on the web, without going into it all here, ranging from mild to wild, you can't have too much information, that in itself may help you alleviate your fear.

< Message edited by Amaros -- 1/21/2008 6:34:27 AM >

(in reply to corysub)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 7:05:12 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
lol I overdosed my slave girl with porn that had anal sex in it..till a point she noticed the theme comming back over and over..... and got curious :P
I

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(in reply to Amaros)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 1/21/2008 2:05:10 PM   
Bamslilgirl


Posts: 142
Joined: 12/18/2007
Status: offline
Whoever it was at the very beginning of this thread that said you have to completely trust the person you are doing this with was 150% right!! This is NOT something I'd ever want to do with just anyone. Can you freakin imagine?!?!?!? Whew!!! Anyway, I'm still pretty new to anal, & the pain is still very strong. But, I've found that the product called "anal eze" or "tush eze" actually do help quite a bit. Once things get started, you can use regular lube if you need it, or just go with things. Hope this helps somewhat.

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 2/2/2008 4:01:56 PM   
ta2dqt


Posts: 375
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bipolarber

Like most things involving penetration, it's usually best to experiment on your own, in a masturbatory fashion, until you get some idea if it's really something you can enjoy, or at least tolerate. I'd say go to your local sex toy emporium, find a selection of small, long thing anal plugs, and try using those first. (Use plenty of lube, obviously.) Get used to the idea of having something entrer your body there... if it's no too terrible, you might just learn to like it.

Of course, sharing such a sexual experience with someone you like and trust will be far better than just lone experimentation.

But, if you find you really just don't like it at all, don't worry about it. Lots of people don't find anal sex enjoyable. At least you can say you tried. :)


I DEFINITELY agree. Always try things alone............  and with your self first...............  Thats what I usually do too.  For my self.......  or with anything I may want to try on my sub/slave/pet. 

Its the Best way to experiment..........  w/all the time ...........  relaxation...........  lube........  music.........  drinks...........videos........  anything YOU want........... to become more comfortable..........w/things you may not be comfortable w/ "yet".

_____________________________

"Ask not that your Dom can do for you, but what you can do for your Dom."

"People are like fine wine, they get better with age!"

"Everything happens for a reason."



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(in reply to bipolarber)
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RE: Anal has no appeal for me and i am afraid of it - 12/9/2008 1:58:48 PM   
AssPlayer


Posts: 10
Joined: 11/30/2008
Status: offline
Winterlight can get over her fear by doing it to me! Nothing to be afraid of.

(in reply to christine1)
Profile   Post #: 51
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