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Finding who to ask - 9/2/2005 7:16:06 AM   
dovemagic


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Joined: 2/21/2005
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People keep telling me "just ask for what you want" Good advice and easy if what I want is someone to play me with canes, or whips or do breast bondage and such, I just watch until I see someone whose style I like and then compliment them and ask if they will do it to me.

But sometimes, OFTEN, I want things that you do see as a scene play. For example, I would like a chance, just for an evening, to have a chance to practice positioning or service.

I have thought about starting a yahoo group for people in my immediate area. Obviously I can not walk behind or beside you if you are on the opposite end of the country and a red glass with two ice cubes and half full of coke does not send over the Internet. (I heard a Dom require this of a sub once and I practically died of envy.)

Why I put this under safety is, I want to be safe when I meet and agree to this. Are there ways to do this safely?
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RE: Finding who to ask - 9/2/2005 7:25:04 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


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The things you describe happen usually in a "dating" scenario, unless you want to either go to a training house, or go to a big event that has a specific service track. Both of those options will allow you to focus on service and "protocol" with no prior relationship involved.

Otherwise, service and protocol tends to be a date thing and not a play thing. So when you start dating doms, then you would very easily be able to do things like that with them, in fact most of them will encourage it. And you date safely in the scene the same way you date anywhere.

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RE: Finding who to ask - 9/2/2005 7:55:43 AM   
JohnWarren


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From: Delray Beach, FL
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One of the neatest way to do this is find a local scene organzation, go to one of their events, and volunteer to be a "gofer." The people in the scene understand the energy you seek so if you chose to "get a cup of coffee" and bring it by kneeling at the recipient's feet, that will be prefectly cool.

We met one of our newest play partners that way. At a Spice event, she came by our table and asked if we wanted any soda. When she brought them, she kneeled on the floor and with downcast eyes put the drinks on the table. Then she said, "Is there anything else you want?" Libby looked at me, winked and stroked the kneeling woman's hair; who shifted and leaned against her let. Then she took a fistful and gently pulled it to bring the woman's eyes into contact with her's. "You," she said with a smile.

One a one to one basis, there's nothing wrong with saying, "I like service. Would you like me to bring things for you."

One point: People often confuse "I like service" with "I like to give sexual services." It's a good idea to make it clear that even if the second is part of the package your offer is much broader.





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RE: Finding who to ask - 9/2/2005 8:44:12 AM   
OsideGirl


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Joined: 7/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

One of the neatest way to do this is find a local scene organzation, go to one of their events, and volunteer to be a "gofer." The people in the scene understand the energy you seek so if you chose to "get a cup of coffee" and bring it by kneeling at the recipient's feet, that will be prefectly cool.




Some of the local events that I've been to had people that offered to be "protocol submissives" for the evening. Meaning that they merely served with a great deal of formality.

We know a female Master that came out of the gay leather scene in San Francisco. When she lived in this area she gave classes on protocol service and on "The 7 positions of submission". They were very cool classes if nothing more than to have some view on that world.

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RE: Finding who to ask - 9/3/2005 4:26:14 AM   
mossy


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dovemagic .....i agree with what was said already.....and i am with you all the way for this has been my greatest challenge, like you. What has worked for me so far is tenacity, bravery, and creativity... So far it sounds like you are ahead of most

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RE: Finding who to ask - 9/6/2005 4:55:28 AM   
Sweeticing


Posts: 164
Joined: 12/30/2004
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First I would search yahoo there may already be a group just like what you described. Also sounds like you want to start a group look for thoes already established in your area. They are great ways to start chatting and meeting thoes with like minds :) If there is none then yahoo is a great way to start one that is how swvapex got started .

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