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The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:05:12 AM

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Here's a good question for the board...generally speaking, do members experience a pattern of difficulty using whatever toys they bring into their inventory? Let me describe my own experiences to give a clear picture of what i mean.

Last fall, i was serving a Mistress who wanted to explore chastity. The first device was a disaster and it took about four to five months to finally find what worked best. Problems such as irritation, hygiene, lubrication, and discomfort during wear all had to be worked through by trial and error. Next, She decided She wanted to employ a ball-stretcher/crusher. Again, the device turned out to be difficult to use. It was so tight on the inside diameter, it could only be put on by myself and then only after soaking in a very hot bath. One thing to note here is that neither of these items were able to be bought and used "as advertised."

Obviously, something like rope or a crop are very simple and basic, so i'm speaking of the more complicated items that are available. For example, i cringe at the thought of buying something really expensive such as a TENS unit, only to find that once again it has problems that exist but aren't discussed and force another research project. But back to my main question...is this the "norm" for most and if so, what sort of approach has been employed to bring each item into play so it doesn't ruin a scene so to speak? It's a given that whatever is selected will require some practice to develop skill along with how it works on a particular subject...i'm talking about things that simply don't work as anticipated.

anthrosub

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RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:18:29 AM

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I always go by the motto " keep it simple ". If a toy is too complicated, I'm not interested. I could spend a whole day with my slave, some clothespins, a crop, and a some rope and enjoy myself immensely.

(in reply to anthrosub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:18:42 AM

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From: Washington
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The only one i have had trouble with is my butterfly vib. It said "one size fits all"--yeah right

. The straps weren't even close to fitting my chubby legs. Now i have to add extensions to them. I think this will be a very interesting thread.

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

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RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:43:45 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Estring
I always go by the motto " keep it simple ". If a toy is too complicated, I'm not interested. I could spend a whole day with my slave, some clothespins, a crop, and a some rope and enjoy myself immensely.

I agree 100%. I'd add in my wooden hairbrush with boar bristles! So simple and yet such the instrument of torture.

But essentially, when ask what is my favorite instrument of torture, I respond my hand. When I asked what is my favorite toy, I resond my sub.

As you said, the whole trying to figure this stuff out took a lot of time and probably ruined the mood. If one really appeals to you, bring it in and play with it. If only you can put it on, make a game out of it. But just don't limit yourself to it.

- LA

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RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:44:22 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

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From: Rochester, NY
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I make my own toys, and I can't tell you how many times something that looked great on paper turns out not so great.

For example, I woked for a few days on a leather locking chasitity belt. It looked great, worked really well, but the leather was stiff and just a bit wide. Still hasn't been used. Oh well.

Yours,
Taggard

< Message edited by TallDarkAndWitty -- 7/11/2004 10:45:17 AM >

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A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

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(in reply to anthrosub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:45:19 AM

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From: southeast Mississippi
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How about labels that say "one size fits most thin people"? As my screen name suggests, i'm not underweight.

At the risk of self-embarrassment, i will now talk about butt plugs. i have had a Goldilocks type search for one that fits. Basically, if it will go in, it won't stay in. First i bought the smallest. Goes in easily, exits on its own. Went one size up to medium. OMG!!! Who thinks that's a medium compared to the smallest? They missed a step somewhere.

After a round of rectum problems, i discovered that i'm smaller than normal there. Well, that's sort of a relief to discover that it's not all my inability to completely relax.

As an aside, i think the new rating system is cute. However, i may have to change my avatar. Somehow teddy bears and kinky don't seem to go together.

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Toodles,
dixiedumpling

My mind is no place to play alone. Anna Pigeon as written by Nevada Barr

(in reply to proudsub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:47:40 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

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From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dixiedumpling
Goes in easily, exits on its own.

One word: inflatable.

Yours,
Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to dixiedumpling)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 10:52:33 AM

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quote:

Somehow teddy bears and kinky don't seem to go together.

I saw a website once with teddy bears in all kinds of kinky positions and with fetish wear, just wish i could remember it. It was really cute.

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to dixiedumpling)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 12:34:47 PM

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When I'm interested in a toy that is expensive and I have no experience with it I usually try to seek out people who do have experience with same to try to get their feedback. I usually do searches that don't necessarily include the advertising propaganda that goes with the toy. I've also been fortunate enough that often I can find someone who has one and give it a trial run (I live very close to NYC and there is a very large base of people with which to network here).

I can understand the dilemna, though. Often it's the same with purchasing fetish wear that must be ordered. How do you know this size is going to fit this body without need of modifications or those boots are going to be wide enough or narrow enough to be worn without having an undesirably crippling effect?

To your question I would say I have not seen a 'pattern' of difficulty as each toy usually presents it's own challenges. My own approach is that the more informed I am the less likely I am to make a poor choice. The rest is pretty much chance.

As for the problem with the plug as described by dixiedumpling, I very much agree with Taggard's "inflatable" recommendation, but would also add that a simple rope harness will hold a plug in place fairly well and can be worn with minimal discomfort under clothes.

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“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to anthrosub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 1:33:10 PM

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quote:

I always go by the motto " keep it simple ". If a toy is too complicated, I'm not interested. I could spend a whole day with my slave, some clothespins, a crop, and a some rope and enjoy myself immensely.

I have enjoyed an entire day with martial arts takedowns and pins as well as spankings
and pressure point manipulation.

Even simpler :)

Sinergy

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David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

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(in reply to MizSuz)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 4:50:06 PM

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This is one of the reasons I believe in Mentoring. I tend to run into people from time to time who have some really cool toys...but not a clue as to how to use them...or how they feel...or the safety considerations to take. I don't bottom...but if I did, I would want to know just how much experience the Top had before I let her string me up in a suspension harness. Oh...you mean you read about suspension online? That's super...now get away from me.

I think that if you are to pick up any toy that could be possibly more dangerous than a rabbit fur mitten..you should do some training. (But then...we all decide how much risk we are willing to take...but thats my two cents.)

~Thorns

(in reply to anthrosub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 6:09:21 PM

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Sorry to specifically address the chastity problem first. If you want device the first thing is what type. I have no experience with the stuff that requires a peircing, and I assume since you are new to chastity it would be irrelevant anyway.

The three main types are:

1) Essentially locking jock straps (toolboy, waterhole, etc.)

2) Penis cages held onto the body by the balls. (CB-2000, CB-3000, and my favorite for the well-endowed man, the curve [OK, I'm bragging.

], Gates of Hell, etc.)

3) A "wrap around the penis” module (Femdom CB device, old Kali’s teeth bracelet, old The Pole.)

The problem with;

1) “Jock straps” the fit must be right. Yeah one size fits all. (My ass is one size I bet it fits all manufacture’s faces.

) It can be an extra problem if you are the small percent with a high ball sack. (You know, a French poet on pot.:)) They also tend to be wicked expensive. I terms of security, they run the gamut from the Waterhole (scissors it enough) to the Toolboy (just break your hip and spend 6 months in a cast and get it over with.

)

2) Penis cages also have the high ball sac problem. The one designed to try and alleviate this problem, The Curve, has a hinged ring for ease getting around the balls. Unfortunately the balls are not free floating and as they move around at night the little tubule inside will find even the most minor seam. That is painful and scary. If you are well endowed and have high ball sac buying the cage for the curve and the rings for the CB-2000 is not a bad idea. Generally the weak point there is where the cage meets the ring around your balls. It can’t be put back together to fool your Mistress, however.

3) The only one of the “wrap-around” CD (“Chastity Device”) I found in production is the FemDom CD. It’s drawback is it hurts like hell if you get an erection. No I don’t mean a playful hurt. I mean Your Mistress will say come hither, you stand up, and then squirm on the floor in pain. Seriously file the little points down and keep your pants on. It is plastic with holes, can be worn under clothing, showering is not a big production, allows you to pee standing up, and is only $40. But even modified will wake you up when you get an erection while sleeping. In the realm of security it can be defeated by a pair of scissors, but can not be removed and put back on with out her knowing.

4) Leather things not good for long time wear. OK for a few hour play session, but only a few hours? For chastity play? I guess maybe if you only want to try it...

OK, off the subject of chastity. Um, what was the subject again?

Oh yeah. K.I.S.S. (No, do not rock an roll all night and party everyday

) Except when simple is impossible, like male chastity. (One of the things you ladies have an easier time with is the design of your chastity belts.

)

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When the Lady smiles i can't resist her call. As a matter of fact, i don't resist at all. Well that depends if it is a smile or a grimmace.

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RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/11/2004 6:54:52 PM

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Dixie your post reminded me of my first butt plug. My online dom at the time told me to order a large one online, which i did. Having never even seen one before i had no idea of sizes. I nearly fainted when i saw it. OMG it went in the garbage so fast. I went to our local adult store and bought a small one. I use medium now but will never use a large one.

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to dixiedumpling)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 1:29:56 PM

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I agree with Mizsuz on this one. I'd ask around. Who has this toy and that toy? If it isn't too personal of a toy that can be cleaned well ask to borrow it or try it.
We pretty much make most of our own toys. Taking them to parties and such, got a good little ebay business on the side as well. It seems the best toys are those you happen to see people with at parties and you just have to have one of your very own.
Experiment and let your imagination run free. You'll have plenty of toys custom made by your own hands in no time.

(in reply to anthrosub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 2:24:54 PM

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I guess I'm more the "hands on" type. I don't really trust an online place. Although once seeing a dealer at a demo, and seeing the quality of their work, I would buy online.

Interesting that you mention TENS, because the first one I experienced was at physical therapy for my shoulder. Oh.. what came to muh devious lil mind right away. If it's this good on my shoulder... I have been doing some reasearch online and am quite convinced that I should buy one from a reputable dealer with a doctor's prescription. Don't know how anyone else feels about that. Just my opinion. Don't think I want try and make one though..lol.. hmm.. did make a preamp once though..

(in reply to Estring)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 5:24:01 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

quote:

I nearly fainted when i saw it. OMG it went in the garbage so fast.

LMAO. These things cost so much! The kink sites have us over a barrel. It's not like you can go to Wal-Mart and buy a lot of these things. So, you end up paying $19.95 for something you will never, ever use. I have several butt plugs, some tested, some still in the wrapper. It doesn't seem to be the type of thing that someone else would want to use, no matter how much it was washed. And I don't believe they are popular items at rummage sales or to give to the Salvation Army.

_____________________________

Toodles,
dixiedumpling

My mind is no place to play alone. Anna Pigeon as written by Nevada Barr

(in reply to proudsub)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 5:49:36 PM

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I never really saw the need in buying many toys. You'd be amazed at what you can find/make at a moments notice with a bit of inspiration.

Secondly, never buy stuff from the bdsm stores I know you're supporting the scene but just learn to make it yourself. It'll mean more in the long run as well. Home Depot and Army surplus stores are your friend.

(in reply to dixiedumpling)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 5:53:41 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: afmvdp
Secondly, never buy stuff from the bdsm stores I know you're supporting the scene but just learn to make it yourself. It'll mean more in the long run as well.

That may be true for some people, but it sure isn't for me. I have less than zero interest in learning to craft leather, etc proficiently. I can put a decent handle on a cane, but I don't want to have to learn to be a master plaiter just cuz i like singletails. I don't think my play partners should suffer because of my inability to work leather.

I'm quite happy finding artisans who love their craft and while I hate the prices, I'm generally willing to pay them for a good quality toy.

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-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

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RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 5:59:22 PM

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Again that all comes down to your desire and how far you want to take things. For me there is nothing better than making a device of my own mental creation and then to turn around and use that. Perhaps it's just a different level of devotion to the Discipline that I intend to direct upon my subs and the same level at which I expect them to respond.

(in reply to SherriA)

RE: The Trouble with Toys - 7/12/2004 6:13:29 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: afmvdp
Again that all comes down to your desire and how far you want to take things. For me there is nothing better than making a device of my own mental creation and then to turn around and use that. Perhaps it's just a different level of devotion to the Discipline that I intend to direct upon my subs and the same level at which I expect them to respond.

I don't think it has anything to do with my "level of devotion". It has everything to do with self-awareness of my inability to build anything effectively. Just because i'm not a craftsman doesn't mean I'm less "devoted" than you are. I'm pretty sure my play partners are satisfied with the level of reaction they get from me with toys that are made by professional craftsmen and craftswomen. At any rate, they keep coming back for more.

Buying toys doesn't say anything about an individual, other than the fact that they buy toys. Anything else you read into it is coming from you, not them.

_____________________________

-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

(in reply to afmvdp)

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