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christine1 -> RE: Luscious's Laughter Lair (2/12/2008 7:59:16 PM)
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Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a
bench talking, and one blonde says to the other,
"Which do you think is farther away... Florida or
the moon?" The other blonde turns and says
"Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????"
CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She
tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for
a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburettor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and
asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get
your act together. Just yesterday you take away my
license and then today you expect me to show it to
you!"
RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a
river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other
side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the
river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's
office and said that her body hurt wherever she
touched it.
"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left
shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and
screamed even more. She pushed her knee and
screamed;
likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed.
Everywhere she touched made her scream.
The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are
you?
"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is
broken."
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car
on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was
astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel
was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing
lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his
window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL
OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking
one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in
space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the
first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other
and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun,
you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you
know. We're going at night!"
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It
was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on
Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a
vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear
it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or
off?"
>
FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had
acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their
names were. The blonde responded by saying that one
was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend
said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like
that?"
"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're
watch dogs!"
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