RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (Full Version)

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ThundersCry -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/5/2008 5:39:25 PM)

Cuz I like too -L- kinda like MasterFire said....
 
With just anyone....of course not.
 
I have a masochistic streak in me that needs/wants... fed at times...
 
Ain`t no big...deal.
 




DesFIP -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/5/2008 6:34:09 PM)

Bottoming is about receiving sensation. Not about submission.

If you come home with an aching back and ask your submissive to massage it, are you suddenly the sub because she is giving you a pleasurable sensation? And if a back massage with hands feels good, why is it a back massage done with a flogger should feel bad. I've known of a dom who had his sub do this for him a couple of times a week, he had a bad back and this helped relieve the pain. Better than surgery.




DommeChains -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/5/2008 6:37:25 PM)

On the rare occasions I bottom it is for the sheer sensation.  I am very picky about who tops me, what they do and they have to be OK with my near-constant feedback/suggestions/politely worded commands.

I am a dominant 24/7 regardless of what I am doing or experiencing.  I am comfortable enough to own my needs.




Gwynvyd -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/5/2008 6:51:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Bottoming is about receiving sensation. Not about submission.

If you come home with an aching back and ask your submissive to massage it, are you suddenly the sub because she is giving you a pleasurable sensation? And if a back massage with hands feels good, why is it a back massage done with a flogger should feel bad. I've known of a dom who had his sub do this for him a couple of times a week, he had a bad back and this helped relieve the pain. Better than surgery.


Bingo... exactly...

My back hurts sooo bloody much at times. ( fly off a horse some time and land badly.. that will do it.)  and a regular massage just doesnt relax me enough to pop things back into place.. some times even the karate chopping from hell doesnt do it.. so we bust out the big guns... and it relaxes me enough to ooze into bed and be popped back into place.

I do not per se... "submit" but I will bottom. I am a happy little pain slut. It does however take a very special person for me to bottom to.

Hell I would love to have that outlet. I havent had that in ages. But then I would also love to have a local chew toy as well...  such is my dualistic nature.
*shrugs*

Gwyn





DiurnalVampire -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/5/2008 6:57:22 PM)

If a Dominant enjoys the feelings, and directs their sub or slave in teh actions to be taken... then they are still being Dominant. Personally I dont enjoy the feelings of being a bottom. I considered it once, with a friend, but none of the things we discussed sounded enjoyable.
I do know a few Doms who have bottomed for me, becasue they knew I wasnt going to consider them submissive just because they liked the other side of the whip on occasion.

DV




LadyHibiscus -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/5/2008 7:09:20 PM)

I remember having great fun bottoming, but it was with very specific people who understood what I was doing and why...  I haven't done it in oh, eight years?  But might again someday.  Why not? 




Aneirin -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 3:12:56 AM)


Thankyou to all that have replied to my question so far. the different perspectives are food for thought .   It is most interesting to note that like switches, those that identify with the label Dominant , be it  a role, or whom they naturally are, their lifestyle, all have a different understanding  leading to the premise that  no single understanding is necessarily the correct understanding and there, no one way is the right way.

As I pictorily understand the scene, it is like a spectrum, pure 100%, I Dom(me) only, through to pure 100% , I sub only, and there is a vast  range of variations, different shades in between, the switch being about midway in that spectrum.

Where that D-type, Switch or s- type is within that spectrum, depends wholy on who they are and whom they are with and where they are in time, with the exception of some that will not vary for their own reasons.Either they cannot or will not, people who would be seeking their exact opposite for balance in their lives to exist.

There are also I understand people , pure D types and s- types,who feel they would like to vary, but have not yet arrived at that point in their lives, but in time may well with  the right counterpart, as there are people who are very interested in BDSM, but have not yet taken that step forward into the scene, but may well with the right partner.

The whole point of my question was for myself to obtain an understanding about what a  D type is and what a Switch is.That is a Switch that is more Dominant than sub.

From perusing the various profiles on here, perhaps looking for a prospective partner, I come across profiles that state ' No switches ', mostly when a person is seeking a Dominant partner. This excludes a person based upon the assumption that a switch is not wholly dominant and might feel the need to sub.On the other hand, as I have established , there are Dominants that like to sub, or for want of a better word, 'bottom'.

This brings me to the labels which define people on here, simply Dominant, Switch and Submissive, I believe are not explanatory enough, when there exists people who would define themselves as a switch, when in reality, they are a Dominant that likes to bottom, not all 'switches' are 50/50. Perhaps with all these site modifications,CM could be the first within the scene to offer a bit more than the simple norms.











MasterFireMaam -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 3:50:44 AM)

While not everyone may agree with these definitions, it's easier to wrap your head around all this if you consider Top/bottom to be physical roles and D/s to be mental roles (and M/s are spiritual, if you want to go deeper into my stuff). All combinations of these are allowed. I know many masochistic Masters and sadistic slaves.

Master Fire




Faeorie -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 5:10:43 AM)

Some people would consider me a switch other than a Domme ecause of my relationship with my fiance. Sometimes we're equal in bed, other times its either one or the other topping. I usually top more than him, but I enjoy being topped by him as well. To me it's more of a trust issue. I love my fiance very much and trust that he will never hurt me. It also turns me on sometimes for him to get rough with me, and it also gives me somewhat of a subs perspective, so I know some of what they are going through when I dominate them. However, with a sub, I will ALWAYS top, no matter what, and my fiance is the only one I would ever allow to top me.




RedMagic1 -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 7:42:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
Perhaps with all these site modifications,CM could be the first within the scene to offer a bit more than the simple norms.

My Alt profile says "Role: Not Applicable" for exactly the reasons brought up in this thread.  I would much rather have a woman say, "Well you seem interesting, but what are you looking for?" and then have to explain myself.  CM does not have that option, so I constructed two profiles that were complementary.  However, at this point, I log in with this profile 99% of the time, because I am seeing someone, am here primarily for the message boards, and I think it's rude to post under multiple profile names.




TracyTaken -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 7:46:06 AM)

quote:

All combinations of these are allowed. I know many masochistic Masters and sadistic slaves.


And there are doting dominants and subversive submissves.




DominaSmartass -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 9:44:24 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

I am interested,

                    of those of you here that identify as a, 'D ' type and you bottom now and again, why do you do this?

Is it a form of personal experimentation, a  see how it feels scenario?

Or a desire to please another?

Or is there another reason?





Well, obviously it's because we're not real dominants and just need to let our true submissive selves out once in a while ;)

As I'm sure many others have already answered in this post: "Cause it feels good!"

I bottom for massages, hot wax, sharp scratchy things on my back, guy-on-top sex, and floggers, among other things. Those are sensations I like and it has nothing to do with being in control or giving up control, it's just about pleasure. I also give blow jobs to my submissive partner, which is by definition "topping" (giving of sensation) but I don't think many dominant men think of it that way or else all of them would have some sort of identity crisis knowing that their s-types topped them all the time!




breatheasone -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 9:58:39 PM)

quote:

Bottoming is about receiving sensation. Not about submission.

This is exactly how Master and I see this.... We are comfortable with who we are, and what we do with, and for each other.....All this other stuff is just "frosting"




Nikolette -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 10:13:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

I am interested,

                  of those of you here that identify as a, 'D ' type and you bottom now and again, why do you do this?

Is it a form of personal experimentation, a  see how it feels scenario?

Or a desire to please another?

Or is there another reason?






First of all. I love when anyone asks this question or brings up this dialogue.

Sometimes its to experiment and see how it is for the other side. I like to use my toys on myself to see how it actually feels and I like to have someone else use them on me. I think it improves my ability to use them (ie: floggers etc)

Sometimes its because I am a bit masochsitic as WELL as sadistic. So I enjoy some bottoming for the purpose of recieving pain.

Sometimes its a desire to please someone else.

As a Domme I have found few opportunities to give myself to another person in a way that exposes vulnerabilities. I enjoy the exchange of bottoming for the sake of the intensity of it. I'm not wholly comfortable in it and I like that feeling of tension and I like having to stretch myself to see what happens and offer up more to them.

Additionally I like to bottom from the Top and be in control of the sub/slave topping because it creates an even more intense power exhange in some ways. To require a slave/sub to reach beyond their natural context and change things up is a major challenge. So far this has been a significant reason. I would not bottom for someone who was Dominant if/when this was the reason I wanted to bottom. And I'd like to add while I've been intriged about bottoming for a "true" Dom/Domme I haven't been interested enough to try it.

Lately though my motivation has been a bit peculiar and you are welcome to message me on the other side if you are interested in it.





DarkDaddyZ -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 10:15:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

I am interested,

                   of those of you here that identify as a, 'D ' type and you bottom now and again, why do you do this?

Is it a form of personal experimentation, a  see how it feels scenario?

Or a desire to please another?

Or is there another reason?




In my past it's been sometimes for the experience.  I don't think I've ever done it with the desire to please another.

DDZ




Leatherist -> RE: Dom(mes) that bottom (2/6/2008 10:18:53 PM)

You subs worry entirely too much about status.

Accept that others simply have thier own likes, and get over yourselves.




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