RE: Personal Belongings

RE: Personal Belongings (Full Version)

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LaMspeach -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 4:31:08 PM)
I am owned, to me that means personal belongings and All that belongs to me. Maybe that is easy for me to say because I don’t see him allowing others to wear my personal clothing. In my mind some things just aren’t meant to be share like panties and insertables. If your Master agreed to allow you your own personal space and product in the beginning I don’t think it is fair that he changed the agreement with out at least informing you. Then made you feel bad because you were hurt and felt as if he broke your trust.

idontknowdou -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 4:31:12 PM)
yeah u dont share undies thats just gross

charlotte12 -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 4:33:35 PM)
As Master's owned property everything I owned before now belongs to him. I knew this before I begged his collar though. You clearly communicated with him about things that are important and he expressed an understanding and agreement which he then promptly ignored. I'm sorry he was dishonest and hopefully the next man you chose to trust will be upfront with you about his expectations. warm wishes, charlotte

nwcutie102 -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 4:34:23 PM)
i would be sooooo upset. i think a gentlemen and a Master would have have more respect . this was not something ever discussed and talked about.

subsfaith -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 4:45:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tenera Let me preface my question by stating that this isn't about blame or finding fault. I am truly trying to gain insight into my issues, which I do admit to a few [:)] and what I could do better in my next relationship. <snipped> Although I can see where I was wrong in many issues that we had, I can't seem to overcome this one. I would love to hear how other slaves/submissives would feel about this happening to them and of course any insight or help from Masters would be greatly appreciated. Stepping aside from my extremely low personal opinion of him, and of the women who agreed to wear the underwear of a stranger (dying to call them skanks, but I will rise above it)...... your questions about personal development: Just what issues do you want to overcome? How to drop your standards to that of a guttersnipe? Are you really sure you want to? I see nothing wrong with your standards. I see nothing wrong with trading clothes with my best friend, but she is my best friend of 20+ years and not a complete stranger that I haven't met. But I am not sure I would ever trade knickers or thongs (I don't actually own any so this is a hypothetical for me). We should all examine our part in a relationship break-up. Personal growth wouldn't be possible if we didn't. In this case, I would be looking at the point where, against your wishes, he allowed others to use your items of personal hygiene. Or the point where it "slowed down" (but didn't stop) - A man of his word? Faith :: smiles ::

greenearth21 -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 7:32:16 PM)
Seems to me like he was a bit...okay maybe much of a prick for not respecting your wishes. I can certainly understand your feeling heard for not having your boundaries (which i'm assuming had been talked about) being respected. Man the rage I would feel after looking at those pics. Owned property or not....some things are just yours to share with him and not everyone else and their gramps. Just my opinion. Sorry you had to deal with that.

MissMagnolia -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 7:37:29 PM)
If your master is so keen that you should have no property, he is the one who should be paying for the underwear and everything else, not you. I'd take em, burn em, and forget HIM. Cuz that is just revolting honey. I WANT to ask about toys, but I just don't want to go there.[:'(]

tenera -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/6/2008 10:54:53 PM)
First of all I would like to thank everyone for their thoughts, kind words, and advice. I did leave the relationship with much fear and trepidation. With the threats and refusal to “release” me I eventually asked my firm for a transfer to our West Coast offices. I believe in the adage “You reap what you sow” and now find myself enjoying a wonderfully warm California winter. Yes, I do think 45 to 50 degree temps in the winter are warm [:)] Kalista07, I had figured out that I was played and used. As hard as that was for me to accept I did swallow it like the bitter pill it was. Astrologically, my sun being in Virgo makes me the clean, orderly germ phobic that I am. Unfortunately my rising sign being in Libra I’m constantly weighing both sides with entirely too much empathy. Valentyne, you are correct. I did trust him too easily. The good news is that I have given every aspect of this relationship careful thought and have learnt a great deal about myself and human nature in general. eyesopened, I suppose I was a little lucky compared to the others because when I did receive lingerie from him it did have the tags on them, some even had the receipt enclosed. The ones with no receipts I have to wonder – did he put tags on another’s clothing? beargonewild, I am so sorry to hear of the pain you had to endure. You seem to be quite strong now and for that I am very happy for you. GrizzlyBear, I did go for a test and came away clear. Thank God! batshalom OMG the visual of his toothbrush up another man’s ass had me reeling. I bet you’d be a lot of fun on girls’ night out! xxblushesxx, I did not burn them. Instead I threw them in his washer and dryer. Satin, silk, leather, and an ample enough measure of bleach to clean them rather well. Not sure how long the spilt bleach will take to cause holes, but the design was rather nice on a few garments. Evility, the images you spoke of were more than an unpleasant thought. They were the reason for the fear and trepidation in leaving. Aileen1968, another great visual. Care to hit the town with batshalom and me? charlotte12, I will be much less trusting and muck more careful with the next man. One reason I’m taking my time and working through all of this before moving in that direction. This was over 7 months and 1,300 miles ago, and I still have a ways to go. Subsfaith, thank you. Not dropping my standards was a refreshing way to phrase it. Refreshing like a glass of cold water in the face ABD I did need that. MissMagnolia, that thought ran through my mind also. Along with the toy thought, which I don’t even want to think about! Focus and ProlificNeeds, thank you for the welcome and positive feedback.

vampiresscammy -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/7/2008 8:13:37 AM)
I agree with Shawn, Focus and Bear - owning you has nothing to do with changing rules mid play and conviently neglecting to tell you about it or forgetting to mention "hey, I wanna do this now instead". my thoughts are, make it crystal clear in future to any possible significant other that your wishes are such and if at some point they change their mind, a word to you must be made or your out the door with your toys and such. I have OCD, if my SO or lover can not understand and oblige this issue, then they have no business with me, certain things like my intimate clothing and toiletries I do not share, makes me go bonkers

Nineveh -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/7/2008 2:27:14 PM)
It sounds to me as if this is someone who refuses to treat those who chose to submit to him with enough respect to deserve that submission. I am sure there are those out there who wish no consideration whatsoever, and perhaps he would be just what they are looking for, but the fact that he would act as if you deserved no consideration without letting you know that was the way in which he was approaching it is a terrible shame.

orfunboi -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/7/2008 3:04:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross I'm one of those types who honestly have no problems sharing clothes, even panties or bras. My problem is the lack of being informed ahead of time- obviously just trying to take what he can without being responsible or ethical about it. I also have no problem sharing, however, i know who i am loaning my things to, i know how clean that person is, and i agreed to it ahead of time. From what you said, you had no clue what was going on. I'm afraid i would have to move on and find someone else. Oh, but he could keep the thongs......

greeneyedreamer -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/7/2008 3:51:36 PM)
Hi All being extremely new to these things... I would try to say that I wouldn't want any man let a lone a man which whom was suppose to protect me, doing these things to me. I think of a dom as a protector, a confidant, a leader and a lover. Apparently, either I am wrong, or he is the biggest ass hole that I have ever heard of. It's not about his ego.. it's about leadership. My own 3¢ worth! Deamer

came4U -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/8/2008 4:12:26 AM)
I wouldn't wear the same ligere for a different man so there is no way in hell I would put myself in that situation. Yet, knowingly going into a poly situation, you pretty well should have allowed for drastic changes as such.

Owner4SexSlave -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/8/2008 4:37:50 AM)
I sitting here still in shock at your post. WTF is or was your Master thinking, is what I'm saying to myself. It should be his job to properly manage and handle property. OK, i read many things in this post, where I would have done something different. But this is just me and not every tom, dick and harry of a Master out there. My views and my perspective on this... I would never would have mindless had somebody else wear my slaves personal clothing in the manner he did. If it did happen it, she would have known about it before hand and not after the fact. I have to side with the ASS comments being made here. An actually, think he's not managing his slaves properly if everybody is using everybody elses shit. This is an open door for problems to happen. So, I'll had being an IDIOT on top of the ASS comment.

DesFIP -> RE: Personal Belongings (2/8/2008 12:58:49 PM)
I'd have thrown a fit the first time I found my belongings stolen and other people's hair on them. I'd have demanded he replace all of it immediately and I'd have bought a suitcase with a lock for my belongings and taken the key with me. I would not immediately have assumed he had knowledge of this and colluded in it, if I had then I would have walked immediately.

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