AAkasha
Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
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Another thread was moving in this direction, but I thought this deserved a new thread. Please refrain from posting why online domination does not work for you; we will assume by your lack of participation that you don't endorse it. For those that do, or are curious about it, here's a place to share your thoughts on what you have learned....
My tips:
1) Make sure telephone is a component. Talk on the phone frequently, and make sure at least some large portion of that talk is without a cam on, not for "play" and just to simply discuss emotions and feelings.
2) Establish ahead of time how long you will be "playing." If two people go online/on the phone (on cam) and are going to engage in power exchange, you need to have some parameters regarding how long they have. Otherwise, one person may have their feelings hurt when someone "has to go," and the person in control of the tempo can determine when things need to wind down.
3) Remember that intense moments still come with 'subdrop', 'topdrop' or whatever your label is for "feeling emotional after it's done." No hugging, holding, cuddling is possible via a PC. Phone is where this should be handled. In my experience, sometimes a very intense moment can lead to a difficult transition back to real life and there's a feeling of emptiness because of the lack of physical contact. This is the downfall, I would say, of many online relationships - because you don't get closure from these intense moments and the feelings can turn into resentment. There is no easy way out. It just requires a lot of talking, and a nice follow up in the next days.
4) Send gifts. No, not "tributes," but gifts, from the heart. Three dimensional things are required if you want this relationship to last. Something to hold, feel, smell. It goes both ways - dominant to submissive, submissive to dominant. If you are emotionally involved and it's not casual play and neither person cares, send a small token regularly. In my most significant relationship, my submissive regularly sent me clothing of his. Let's just say I sent him clothing of mine as well, but mine was a little more intimate.
5) Don't fall into the trap of relying on "lists of what to do to your submissive" - instead, use your own gut feelings and emotions. Don't feel like every moment on cam you have to be playing.
6) Webcam isn't the end-all, be-all of online relationships. Digital photos and digital videos can be just as special.
Those are off the top of my head. I've had a lot of "online relationships" that remained online, but I would consider them "phone relationships" with cams/pictuires as an added bonus. My longest "online relationship" was two years and included well over a few gigabytes of video and picture files transfered (and this was in 2001-2002) exchanged, and at its peak included 2 - 4 hours on the phone every night. Needless to say we found real life was more "cost effective" (and got married), but it was never our intent to have a romantic relationship.
Akasha
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Tips for online domination - 
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