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Wondering subs wish to know - 9/9/2005 9:02:05 PM

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Scenario : You have allowed your sub to go out for the evening ( why you are not with her is beyond the point). she returns to you feeling quite the seductress and acting upon this rush of sensuality.
Question : Do you allow her to continue with her agressive behavior or do you scold her and have her push this emotion away, and why?

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/9/2005 9:06:07 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

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From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: quietlilone
Scenario : You have allowed your sub to go out for the evening ( why you are not with her is beyond the point). she returns to you feeling quite the seductress and acting upon this rush of sensuality.
Question : Do you allow her to continue with her agressive behavior or do you scold her and have her push this emotion away, and why?

Personally, I simply adore aggressive sexuality in any female, be it top or bottom. I love seeing the need to be touched, used, pleased, and punished in my slave's eyes. I would indeed reward such wanton behavior.

But that is just me...

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to quietlilone)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/9/2005 10:18:15 PM

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Depends really. Most of the time it would be welcome, she'd likely get ravished... thoroughly. But there are times its not appropriate. When it is or isn't appropriate requires getting to know me personally, and being aware of that. I'm not obtuse about it, and I try not to make those cues hidden mine fields. Often I'll stop things if its a bad time and generally I don't have a problem saying what's on my mind. What I expect of a girl is that she accept that for what it is, if its a bad time or I need something else from her at that moment, its just that; rather than taking it as rejection and falling apart emotionally because she was told no. Childish behavior is never appealing.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to quietlilone)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 5:03:27 AM

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From: Delray Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: quietlilone

Scenario : You have allowed your sub to go out for the evening ( why you are not with her is beyond the point). she returns to you feeling quite the seductress and acting upon this rush of sensuality.
Question : Do you allow her to continue with her agressive behavior or do you scold her and have her push this emotion away, and why?

It would depend on how I felt. I doubt I'd ever push her away, but sometimes I'd take the active "ravish" role. Other times, I'd have her pleasure me. That might involve female above intercourse, oral sex or just tying her in standing bondage with one hand free, giving her a bowl of warm oil to dip her hand in and sitting in a comfortable chair while she pleasurered herself for my visual enjoyment.

If the "submissive" was not Libby, that would mean that option A was not available (we reserve that for ourselves), but I would have the additional option of letting her pleasure both of us as we made love.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to quietlilone)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 9:15:55 AM

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I'd let her ravish me then I would punish her for being agressive. Best of both worlds >:)

(in reply to JohnWarren)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 9:36:17 AM

perverseangelic

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From: Davis, Ca
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quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedKev

I'd let her ravish me then I would punish her for being agressive. Best of both worlds >:)

Huh. From the other side of things, this would totally fuck with me. I'd have been allowed to do soemthing--meaning my partner doesn't mind it and doesnt' find it inappropriate. Then be punished for the thing I was allowed to do. It'd send really mixed signals and make me pretty insecure for a while.

Unless, of course, he was clear that it wasn't punishment so much as "I want to beat you"

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to WickedKev)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 10:23:39 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic

quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedKev

I'd let her ravish me then I would punish her for being agressive. Best of both worlds >:)

Huh. From the other side of things, this would totally fuck with me. I'd have been allowed to do soemthing--meaning my partner doesn't mind it and doesnt' find it inappropriate. Then be punished for the thing I was allowed to do. It'd send really mixed signals and make me pretty insecure for a while.

Unless, of course, he was clear that it wasn't punishment so much as "I want to beat you"

I have to support perverseangelic in this thought. Too many "Dominants" treat punishment as if it were a toy, something to play with, having no regard for how it effects the one being punished. Roleplay is fine, as long as everyone knows it's just play. But how many times does one stop to say "I'm not really punishing you, this is just a game?" Not many, I think. Most prefer to keep the illusion that it's something real, because this enhances their own enjoyment of the fantasy. But punishment has the effect of making one feel ashamed, or humbled. Applied incorrectly, it can be devastating to one's self esteem.

When I punish or correct someone, I'm sending a signal that her behavior was unacceptable. For some with fragile egoes, they might even receive that message to mean they themselves are unacceptable. Even if that isn't the case, anyone who's allowed herself to be in a position to be punished by me is probably driven at least in some part by a desire to please. Being punished tells her she was NOT pleasing. This may motivate her to want to change her behavior, which is why most people use punishment in the first place. But, if punishment is given for random things, with no reason, or for things that should be encouraged, it can confuse and bewilder the one being punished. If I enourage a certain behavior one day, and punish my slave for it the next day, what kind of message does that send?

I see this as a dangerous way to play with someone's head. And it's counterproductive as well. Punishment, correction, or discipline should have the effect of teaching. They should help to make it clear in her mind what behaviors are accepted, and which ones are not. If she does something that is pleasing to me, she should be rewarded, not punished. I believe it's very important for me to be consistent in this way to help her grow and learn how to be more pleasing. More importantly, I think I need to do this because it nurtures here and enourages good emotional health.

_____________________________

Master Hyde
A self-righteous, poly, dominant, possessive control freak with strong paternal tendencies and a sadistic inner child

(in reply to perverseangelic)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 2:51:57 PM

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Depends on the partner. With the Owner he would enjoy seeing me randy, put my mouth on his cock and enjoy making me go to bed unfulfilled.

Some doms love aggressiveness and openness, some prefer passivity. Some prefer bland open communication with no preferences given. Just depends on the style.

(in reply to quietlilone)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 4:34:38 PM

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I would wOnder where she was wAndering that evening to come back in such a state of sexual urgency. And I would probably send her out wAndering the next night, and the one after that.

Seriously though, I can only comment on my feelings to the question posed and for me, it would be welcome.

_____________________________

Know which bridge to build, which one to cross, and which one to burn!

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 4:55:12 PM

obis

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From: Austin, TX, USA
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I wouldn't scold by any means -- being horny and aggressive is no crime.

If I wasn't interested in sex, I'd deny her and toy with it, and eventually let her pressure build until I give her permission to let loose with herself while I watch.

If I WAS interested, well I'd probably still deny her for a bit just to make her squirm :) -- push her away and forbid her from touching herself. I'd pretend to be occupied with mundane things. Then I'd reassert our positions by taking control and channelling her excitement -- make her beg, REALLY beg. She enjoys verbal humiliation, so I would make her admit what an incredibly dirty girl she must be to have such clear excitement, etc. Just generally build her up while at the same time reasserting that I am the one in control of her pleasure, no matter how much her excitement was the initial motivator.

Are you asking more about if she was being rude, disrespectful or bratty in how her excitement was being shared when she comes home? In that case, I'd certainly treat it the same way I would her being rude or bratty any other time.

(in reply to quietlilone)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 6:15:05 PM

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From: Sacramento, California
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How come female submissives are not "subbes"?

Is it only dominant females that need to be knocked down a peg with stupid, diminutive labels?

(I know this has nothing to do with anything above, it just came to me and I had to say it).

(in reply to obis)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 6:46:22 PM

stef

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By that reasoning, all the dominant females who refer to themselves as Dommes are insulting themselves?

Interesting.

~stef

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"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to ManOwner)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 9:08:22 PM

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From: Sacramento, California
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Insulting themselves? I don't know. I just don't like the distinction.

(in reply to stef)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/10/2005 10:57:03 PM

FelinePersuasion

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some submisives are called subbie's that's similar spelling to domme's* cheeky grin*

(in reply to ManOwner)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/11/2005 1:16:01 AM

obis

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From: Austin, TX, USA
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quote:

Is it only dominant females that need to be knocked down a peg with stupid, diminutive labels?

Only the ones who go out of their way to find offense where none was intended :P

(in reply to ManOwner)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/11/2005 1:22:32 AM

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quote:

I'd let her ravish me then I would punish her for being agressive. Best of both worlds >:)

Boy talk about no sense of humour.......

(in reply to WickedKev)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/11/2005 1:40:52 AM

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From: Sacramento, California
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quote:

Only the ones who go out of their way to find offense where none was intended :P

Offense doesn't have to be intended to be offensive :P

(in reply to WickedKev)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/11/2005 6:15:55 AM

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back on track here...thanks for the comments. Seems the majority have no problem with this situation and even welcome it at times. Nice to know. Thanks again.

(in reply to ManOwner)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/11/2005 4:36:56 PM

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I think it would be stupid to waste the opportunity here. Maybe see if she can suduce you 'from the bottom'? Or you could just take the Sub and use her, but at your pace and to satisfy your needs. If that means ravish her then do it! If that means spank her then that's fine too. NEVER pass up an opportunity to have some fun and always remember that sometimes SHE needs to have some real fun too!

_____________________________

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

(in reply to quietlilone)

RE: Wondering subs wish to know - 9/11/2005 10:25:41 PM

kc692

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ManOwner

quote:

Only the ones who go out of their way to find offense where none was intended :P

Offense doesn't have to be intended to be offensive :P

An apology in advance to quietlilone: I will not hijack your thread but for one more moment, and then I will leave it alone:

ManOwner you are totally correct, in that offense doesn't have to be intended to be offensive. In the future, speak for yourself only as to your preferences, and do not presume to know what mine or any other dommes' preferences are. If you do not feel comfortable being called that, you are free to have them call you whatever you wish, if they will do as you ask. Personally, I happen to like being called a domme, and differentiated from the dominant males. I also know a lot of others on this site feel the same. Again, speak for yourself, I do not need or want you to speak on what you consider my behalf.

KC

Sorry, quietlilone, giving you back your thread.

(in reply to ManOwner)

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