RE: Depression

RE: Depression (Full Version)

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kittengirl8 -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 1:46:37 PM)
There's no clear answer to this, obviously. However, you've gotten some good responses (like julietsierra and justdavid, and others, of course - their names just stuck). Once upon a time I went through some obvious low dips (not clinical depression, though) and I had a tendency to get really annoying, really quiet, really... I don't know, all sorts of random things. I think one thing that helps the sub with depression is if the D-type recognizes the early signs of a low point coming up. For me, once my Dom started actually noticing (eye roll) when I was getting low, he was able to encourage me to talk more ,keeping me from getting to the worsts points. While it's definitely different for other people (and between clinical and not) there's usually something that can be done, in some way (professional help, drugs, just talking...). Be well. ~kitten~

GreedyTop -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 2:10:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bamabbwsub quote: The problem is that the chemical (I'm sorry that I forget the actual name), is reduced after we select depression as a solution... in other words, it is the depression that creates the lack of chemical rather than the lack causing the depression. Usually, depression is a choice we make when we believe we have no other choice to make... it is usually an internal and subconscious decision. That is why I suggest using a regiment of spankings or canings to elevate the chemical and then to look at the issues in a more clear way in order to resolve the key problem. Or at least to show that there is a different path to select other than depression. Kindandcruel, I heartily disagree with your assessment about depression. The paragraph quoted above indicates to me that you believe people choose to be depressed, when that is SO not true (at least with chemical depression). Clinical depression is caused by an imbalance in the levels of seratonin, just as diabetes is a chemical imbalance of insulin. Do you also advocate that diabetics choose to become diabetics (in regards to Level I Diabetes)? Despite your degree in psychology, your opinions and "treatment" seem to be a dangerous combination when it comes to someone else's life. I certainly would not wish to undergo your "cure," particularly when it is based on a (singular) Russian study. THANK YOU!! I got more than a bit ...um, IRKED.. when I read that post, but I didn't trust myself to respond in a civil manner.. thank you for saying it for me(minus my rant..LOL)

kittengirl8 -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 2:12:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GreedyTop quote: ORIGINAL: bamabbwsub quote: The problem is that the chemical (I'm sorry that I forget the actual name), is reduced after we select depression as a solution... in other words, it is the depression that creates the lack of chemical rather than the lack causing the depression. Usually, depression is a choice we make when we believe we have no other choice to make... it is usually an internal and subconscious decision. That is why I suggest using a regiment of spankings or canings to elevate the chemical and then to look at the issues in a more clear way in order to resolve the key problem. Or at least to show that there is a different path to select other than depression. Kindandcruel, I heartily disagree with your assessment about depression. The paragraph quoted above indicates to me that you believe people choose to be depressed, when that is SO not true (at least with chemical depression). Clinical depression is caused by an imbalance in the levels of seratonin, just as diabetes is a chemical imbalance of insulin. Do you also advocate that diabetics choose to become diabetics (in regards to Level I Diabetes)? Despite your degree in psychology, your opinions and "treatment" seem to be a dangerous combination when it comes to someone else's life. I certainly would not wish to undergo your "cure," particularly when it is based on a (singular) Russian study. THANK YOU!! I got more than a bit ...um, IRKED.. when I read that post, but I didn't trust myself to respond in a civil manner.. thank you for saying it for me(minus my rant..LOL) I definitely must board the train with GT. Thank you for saying that for all of us who didn't. ~kitten~

AquaticSub -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 2:17:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kittengirl8 I definitely must board the train with GT. Thank you for saying that for all of us who didn't. ~kitten~ I'd like to board as well...

Lucylastic -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 2:32:06 PM)
and here tooo....[>:]

ownedgirlie -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 2:35:26 PM)
I think depression is a choice when it comes down to choosing to seek help vs. choosing to stay in one's current state. Sometimes it is easier to stay in it...or so we think. That was the case with me from time to time until I didn't want to be there anymore.

ghitaPVH -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 3:21:02 PM)
So its a choice to get help? What about those of us who desperatly want help but cant get it. I dont have health insurace, and Ive applied for state healthcare and been denied, and I cant go to the clinic in town because everytime I go there they tell me its a three hour wait and I try to sit there with three small squirmy kids but they crash and burn long before the three hour wait is up so I have to give up and go home...and to top it all off I just lost my collar last night as a result of the depression because I wasnt able to fix it soon enough for his patience to not give out.

chamberqueen -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 3:28:32 PM)
There are things that you can do which will help. For instance, get enough sleep, eat healthy food in moderate amounts, and get exercise. Don't close yourself off from others. For many, a journal will help. Keep in mind that depression is not your fault but simply a chemical imbalance. This is not to say that you will never need professional help. However, by doing the above things combined with keeping open communication with those close to you and being careful not to be overly self critical it should help you to be more stable. Notice triggers in yourself and help to stop the downward slide. (Mine is when I start thinking, "I hate...". If it goes on too long it becomes, "I hate my life". Now I know to readjust my attitude as soon as I start thinking that I hate anything.) Talk to others that have dealt with depression. Someone who hasn't can try to be understanding but they've never walked in your shoes. I find that belonging to someone and doing tasks to please Him, even when I might not feel 100% motivated, helps. With small children your greatest therapy might be to have someone watch them long enough for you to take a 20 minute bubble bath. You'll figure out what it is that you are missing, and be sure to tell your Dom about it. If you can't communicate well with Him about it He will never understand.

KatyLied -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 3:38:41 PM)
I don't know about every community, but in my community the drug/alcohol non-profit organization also does crisis counseling and will counsel/refer people with mental health issues. It may be worth a call to them. If there is a women's shelter, the same thing, they are usually equipped to do counseling/referrals (not just for domestic violence, but in general).

TinkerHell -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 3:40:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: liloneshade Have any of you had a submissive or slave with depression issues? How do you deal with them when they are at a bad low? How do you help them? Disclaimer: I am not offering a diagnosis nor am I discounting the sensible things that others have posted before me on this thread. The patently ridiculous things I just ignored. I have a lovely friend who has Seasonal Affective Disorder which manisfested in a deep dark depression at this time of the year, every year. She did indeed seek medical attention - Depression is not about "the blues" and nothing to play around with... the best course of treatment for her turned out to be Light Therapy. Point being... get medical attention.

ownedgirlie -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 3:49:28 PM)
Wanting to get help is a choice, versus remaining comfortable in one's depression. Obviously I do not know of everyone's situation and available programs, there is no way I could know that. I also know when one is depressed it is really difficult to find the motivation to get help in the first place. But a person has a choice if they want to remain depressed or not, and if they are willing to do the work to overcome it. The three hour wait with squirmy kids is indeed a drag, but staying or leaving is also a choice. Have you looked into online support groups? Chamberqueen is absolutely right, re: diet and exercise making a huge difference. I hope things turn around for you...

angelikaJ -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 4:50:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ghitaPVH So its a choice to get help? What about those of us who desperatly want help but cant get it. I dont have health insurace, and Ive applied for state healthcare and been denied, and I cant go to the clinic in town because everytime I go there they tell me its a three hour wait and I try to sit there with three small squirmy kids but they crash and burn long before the three hour wait is up so I have to give up and go home...and to top it all off I just lost my collar last night as a result of the depression because I wasnt able to fix it soon enough for his patience to not give out. <huggggs> I would apply again re: state insurance. I know the system in FL a little and I agree...it sucks... . Wanting to get help..I am glad...can you check in and then go outside...or when the kids get fussy go for a ride around the block and ask them to call you (if you have a cell phone)... Of course, in a perfect world, you would have a sitter...is there a friend or relative who could help you out for a few hrs?

bamabbwsub -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 5:02:10 PM)
ghita, I'm so sorry that your Dom/Master withdrew your collar. I know it isn't much help, but it sounds as though perhaps he wasn't worthy of you if he couldn't or wouldn't stick around long enough to help you when you need it the most. :::hugs:::

ghitaPVH -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 5:22:48 PM)
No..I think he withdrew it because he thinks taking away the added stress of the D/s dynamic might help aliviate some of the problems. But to tell the truth I think all its done is make it worse. Like its one more thing Ive failed at. Some of the things Ive done on my own to help: I take St Johns wort regularly I maintain a very strict diet I excersise as much as I can, but its been hard to manage with the three UMs..I know its something I need to work harder at. One of my fellow cub scout moms slipps me a few xanax bars a month....

angelikaJ -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 5:29:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie Wanting to get help is a choice, versus remaining comfortable in one's depression. Obviously I do not know of everyone's situation and available programs, there is no way I could know that. I also know when one is depressed it is really difficult to find the motivation to get help in the first place. But a person has a choice if they want to remain depressed or not, and if they are willing to do the work to overcome it. The three hour wait with squirmy kids is indeed a drag, but staying or leaving is also a choice. Have you looked into online support groups? Chamberqueen is absolutely right, re: diet and exercise making a huge difference. I hope things turn around for you... This was my experience with trying to get help without health insurance: I called the local free MH clinic and had to wait 6 weeks to get an appt. I went for my appt only to be told by a very nice man that he was very sorry but the clinic had lost it's funding and was unable to help me... I then went to my regular county health clinic (pro-rated for income) and my reg Physician's Assistant gave me a voucher for the one SSRI that was covered under the Pfizer voucher program... which fortunately took the edge off. Getting help is very different w/o insurance.

Velleity -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 5:41:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: kittengirl8 I definitely must board the train with GT. Thank you for saying that for all of us who didn't. ~kitten~ I'd like to board as well... Room for one more? [sm=wave.gif] I came awfully close to letting my temper get the better of me in my very first post here - I'm happy to use it to thank you instead, bamabbwsub. [sm=applause.gif]

celticlord2112 -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 5:59:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ghitaPVH No..I think he withdrew it because he thinks taking away the added stress of the D/s dynamic might help aliviate some of the problems. But to tell the truth I think all its done is make it worse. Like its one more thing Ive failed at. Some of the things Ive done on my own to help: I take St Johns wort regularly I maintain a very strict diet I excersise as much as I can, but its been hard to manage with the three UMs..I know its something I need to work harder at. One of my fellow cub scout moms slipps me a few xanax bars a month.... I have found that 5-HTP and an Omega-3 (Fish Oil) supplement in addition to St John's Wort can be quite helpful in dealing with depression. 5-HTP is an OTC form of tryptophan, which is metabolized in the liver and hypothalamus into seratonin. Omega-3 Essential Fatty Acids augment overall neurological health. My personal experience, of course, YMMV.

MadRabbit -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 6:12:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: liloneshade How do you help them? You don't. You be supportive and let them help themselves. Playing psychologist or savior or Mister or Miss Fix It rarely ever leads anywhere positive.

celticlord2112 -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 6:13:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: ORIGINAL: liloneshade How do you help them? You don't. You be supportive and let them help themselves. Playing psychologist or savior or Mister or Miss Fix It rarely ever leads anywhere positive. Semantical quibble: I would call that giving them the help they need.

ownedgirlie -> RE: Depression (2/10/2008 6:14:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ This was my experience with trying to get help without health insurance: I called the local free MH clinic and had to wait 6 weeks to get an appt. I went for my appt only to be told by a very nice man that he was very sorry but the clinic had lost it's funding and was unable to help me... I then went to my regular county health clinic (pro-rated for income) and my reg Physician's Assistant gave me a voucher for the one SSRI that was covered under the Pfizer voucher program... which fortunately took the edge off. Getting help is very different w/o insurance. I understand. I have done it myself. I'm not trying to be a hard ass. I am saying ultimately it is a choice if someone wants to pursue help or not. As someone who used to wallow in it, that's where I'm coming from. It was "easier" for me to wallow than to do the work and get out. I am not in any way saying those who are struggling with their persuit of help are at fault for not getting it. It takes a lot of courage to get help, I know this, and I applaud those who are trying to find solutions.

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