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question about gf - 9/13/2005 1:09:29 PM   
mercmjm


Posts: 52
Joined: 2/7/2005
Status: offline 		how do I introduce bdsm into my gf's life?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 2:12:23 PM   
Nuke718


Posts: 240
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		In 2 words, slowly and respectfully.

OK, the and doesnt count so it IS 2 words. But the point is take your time and respect her comfort level at all times.

Does she know you are into it at all? That would help, but isn't always the case. I'm sure that our members have some less general advice. But the only 'nilla GF I brought over had heard about it and done some reading before I met her, so she just needed a steady hand to hold.

Nuke }:-

(in reply to mercmjm)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 3:38:52 PM   
WickedKev


Posts: 305
Joined: 11/26/2004
Status: offline 		Hire a DVD, say Preaching to the Preverted and gauge her reaction.

< Message edited by WickedKev -- 9/14/2005 8:07:46 AM >

(in reply to mercmjm)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 3:43:55 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Have you asked her about movies? Has she watched 9 1/2 weeks? Secretary? That may be a place to start. But I will also state the obvious too, proceed with caution.

(in reply to WickedKev)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 4:02:58 PM   
anopheles


Posts: 241
Joined: 6/23/2005
Status: offline 		I would tell her head on. Tell her that this is something that interests you, and ask her if should be willing to *learn* more about it with you. That way, she knows that you brought the subject up with her in honesty, she isn't put in a position of fear if you suddenly whip out a pair of handcuffs, and you two open a healthy dialogue about the subject, which puts you well on the road to a lasting power exchange relationship.

Best of luck,

--Anopheles

_____________________________

You've got me so high, my shoes are scraping the sky -- for my Luvdragon

(in reply to KatyLied)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 4:09:09 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

how do I introduce bdsm into my gf's life?


Take her out for a nice walk and then pin her to a tree and tie her securely. Bring out the nipple clamps and butt plugs. Insert an inflatable penis gag into her mouth and take a crop to her ass. Write in big letters in lipstick across her chest, "SLUT." Stop for a while and walk away for a half hour. Come back, remove the clamps, gags and plugs and undo the rope and ask her if she liked it. If she proceeds to kick you squarely in the nuts and storms away after expelling an ample amount of spit on your face then, chances are, she didn't like it. On the other hand, if she embraces you with tears in her eyes and melts in your arms panting wildly and humping your leg like a wild boar... I think you have your answer. Best of luck to you. Let me know how this turns out... I might actually have to try this for myself if you get good results.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to mercmjm)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 4:20:12 PM   
anopheles


Posts: 241
Joined: 6/23/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge

quote:

how do I introduce bdsm into my gf's life?


Take her out for a nice walk and then pin her to a tree and tie her securely. Bring out the nipple clamps and butt plugs. Insert an inflatable penis gag into her mouth and take a crop to her ass. Write in big letters in lipstick across her chest, "SLUT." Stop for a while and walk away for a half hour. Come back, remove the clamps, gags and plugs and undo the rope and ask her if she liked it. If she proceeds to kick you squarely in the nuts and storms away after expelling an ample amount of spit on your face then, chances are, she didn't like it. On the other hand, if she embraces you with tears in her eyes and melts in your arms panting wildly and humping your leg like a wild boar... I think you have your answer. Best of luck to you. Let me know how this turns out... I might actually have to try this for myself if you get good results.


Ya know Gauge, when I first started reading this post, I thought it was a silly joke. But as I read on, although I would consider it a rather extreme introduction for my personal tastes, the general underlying "trial by fire" tone is a possible method of introduction. You definitely won't have any question as to whether she was interested or not after that one

_____________________________

You've got me so high, my shoes are scraping the sky -- for my Luvdragon

(in reply to Gauge)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 4:50:30 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: anopheles
Ya know Gauge, when I first started reading this post, I thought it was a silly joke. But as I read on, although I would consider it a rather extreme introduction for my personal tastes, the general underlying "trial by fire" tone is a possible method of introduction. You definitely won't have any question as to whether she was interested or not after that one


Yup, and think of all the nice S&M games you'll have a chance to play with all the guys in the cellblock with you.


_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to anopheles)
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RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 5:30:55 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Ya know Gauge, when I first started reading this post, I thought it was a silly joke.


That was its intent.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to anopheles)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 6:03:11 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline 		As soon as she acts up say "Listen here young lady, talk like that is going to get you a spanking." If she continues to play her cards, that's when you throw her over your knee and let her have it.

As for what you want done in the bedroom, you normally start with a few things such as blind folds, rope, a little aggressive behavior, and some dirty talk. Everything goes from there. Best of luck.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to mercmjm)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 6:10:45 PM   
Mylee


Posts: 217
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FangsNfeet

As soon as she acts up say "Listen here young lady, talk like that is going to get you a spanking." If she continues to play her cards, that's when you throw her over your knee and let her have it.

As for what you want done in the bedroom, you normally start with a few things such as blind folds, rope, a little aggressive behavior, and some dirty talk. Everything goes from there. Best of luck.




Spankings...mmm...always start with spankings, yep thats the best advice..its how i was introduced...mmmmm spankings..* sighs whistfully*

~my'lee

(in reply to FangsNfeet)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 6:35:29 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge

quote:

how do I introduce bdsm into my gf's life?


Take her out for a nice walk and then pin her to a tree and tie her securely. Bring out the nipple clamps and butt plugs. Insert an inflatable penis gag into her mouth and take a crop to her ass. Write in big letters in lipstick across her chest, "SLUT." Stop for a while and walk away for a half hour. Come back, remove the clamps, gags and plugs and undo the rope and ask her if she liked it. If she proceeds to kick you squarely in the nuts and storms away after expelling an ample amount of spit on your face then, chances are, she didn't like it. On the other hand, if she embraces you with tears in her eyes and melts in your arms panting wildly and humping your leg like a wild boar... I think you have your answer. Best of luck to you. Let me know how this turns out... I might actually have to try this for myself if you get good results.


Oh God, Chardonay out the nose stings.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: question about gf - 9/13/2005 7:01:15 PM   
Tempestspet


Posts: 360
Joined: 1/13/2005
Status: offline 		Gauge....that was hilarious.... love it!!!

Well, most know by now....I'm just a big old brute...not really, but the way some of you react...laughs...

I think you should maybe just... say something along the lines of, hey babe (insert whatever you call her) I'd like to talk to you about something important to me. Explain, milder stuff first probably, who you are (in the closet *grins*) and what makes you really tick. She will hopefully be a big girl, and talk like a rational adult with you about it. You will know soon after that whether it's an interest of hers, or if she thinks it sounds fun to try. If it goes anything like I have experianced with my Master..... he chuckled, and said realllyyyyy...... and proceeded to tell me that he the same way, and that why we are together.

Hope that helped at least a little.

Tempest's pet
jennifer


(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: question about gf - 9/14/2005 12:58:32 PM   
Sunshine119


Posts: 611
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline 		Geez....

After 49 years of living the most vanilla life possible, vanilla marriage, vanilla kids, vanilla divorce......I found myself out on a "vanilla" date with a new man eight months ago. Would never, in my wildest dreams (well MAYBE in my dreams) did I ever even consider living a life like this.

After we hit it off on the first date, he started kidding around with me about tying me up, sent me a few erotic stories and teased me with the whole idea. The film "The Secretary" followed, along with some light, sensual dragging of a flogger over my skin while I laid face down on a bed and had to "guess" what he was doing.

Now, eight months later... heck....bring in the BIG gear.....lol

Good luck....You never know, she may be waiting for a MAN just like you. No more metrosexuals for me!

quote:

ORIGINAL: mercmjm

how do I introduce bdsm into my gf's life?


(in reply to mercmjm)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: question about gf - 9/14/2005 2:30:49 PM   
anopheles


Posts: 241
Joined: 6/23/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren


quote:

ORIGINAL: anopheles
Ya know Gauge, when I first started reading this post, I thought it was a silly joke. But as I read on, although I would consider it a rather extreme introduction for my personal tastes, the general underlying "trial by fire" tone is a possible method of introduction. You definitely won't have any question as to whether she was interested or not after that one


Yup, and think of all the nice S&M games you'll have a chance to play with all the guys in the cellblock with you.



In agreement with you JohnWarren, a bad idea to try something that tough, but the concept of trial by fire, in a mild, consensual, "would you like to try something a little different" manner, could be a an interesting and fun way to open up the dialogue about more involved types of play.....

_____________________________

You've got me so high, my shoes are scraping the sky -- for my Luvdragon

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 15
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