What Are You Crying For?

What Are You Crying For? (Full Version)

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charmdpetKeira -> What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 4:56:40 PM)
No, really; it’s something I have an urge to do while in a session with my owner, but I don’t know why; except for perhaps emotional release. I think there is more to it then that though. Furthermore, I don’t know how. I have tried to think of reasons why I would cry during a session; none of the reasons I’ve come up with seem to mesh with why I might want it. Does it matter for you? Also, if you have any thoughts on why the idea of wanting to cry in a session might be scary; I’d appreciate it. Best wishes, k

ChainedExistence -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 5:53:28 PM)
Sometimes what is happening sort of puts you on emotional overload. You aren't necessarily crying from pain or sadness or fear, but you just get physically and emotionally overwhelmed. Heck, I've cried before because it was so incredibly awesome. As for it being scary... Are you afraid your tears might stop what is happening? Does it feel like a sign of weakness? Do you think it means you aren't handling the pain the way he might want? I've sometimes tried to stop myself from crying because of some self-imposed ideal of what a good slave should be. Master has never demanded that of me, but I tend to try to be Miss Perfect and act like I can handle anything And you know..sometimes he just likes it when I cry and let my guard completely down. Crying can be a great release, and a bonding experience.

sunshinemiss -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 5:57:57 PM)
Crying is very intimate, it's letting go.... In doing wiitwd, it is natural to want emotional release - whether that is a deep belly laugh, intense orgasm, or tears. They don't have to "mean" anything, they are just a physical expression. Do I care why I cry? No, I just do... and then it's over. As for scary: well, crying is very intimate, it makes our skin blotchy, difficult to breathe, out of control, etc. Maybe one of these just isn't your cup of tea. Or maybe crying is linked to something ugly in your mind or experience. We are very vulnerable when we cry and therefore easily convinced of what we are told. This level of vulnerability might be troublesome to you also... If you can let yourself experience and then write about it or talk about it after, you might find some truth. I read your profile. Your journal entries suggest a certain discomfort with deep expression (not wanting to roar for example) Perhaps it is more than crying? smiles Be patient with yourself. You will roar... and cry... a little at a time... or perhaps all at once. peace

mbes -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 6:09:08 PM)
I don't cry. Ever. Except--- And those are the times to watch out for. If I'm crying, then you have reached my soul.

littlebitxxx -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 6:09:27 PM)
It probably feels good to be able to let go enough to cry in a session. Never been there myself but then I don't remember the last time I cried for whatever reason. The closest I've come is a fit of hysterical giggles - in the middle of receiving oral of all things! Ah well, XMaster said it was a sign of being comfortable enough to laugh, although my timing could be worked on. Actually, congrats on the crying...let it all hang out!

charmdpetKeira -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 6:54:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ChainedExistence Sometimes what is happening sort of puts you on emotional overload. You aren't necessarily crying from pain or sadness or fear, but you just get physically and emotionally overwhelmed. I think I would understand it better if it was a heat of the moment type thing, but this is something I think/have been thinking about for some time. I have specifically asked him to make me cry; though he hasn’t yet. quote: Heck, I've cried before because it was so incredibly awesome. Now that, sounds like a good reason to me. quote: As for it being scary... Are you afraid your tears might stop what is happening? Maybe, only from the stories he’s told me; he’s not afraid to do it and doesn’t seem as though he would be bothered by my tears, if I were not harmed. quote: Does it feel like a sign of weakness? I’m not sure, the idea of him seeing me cry, might bother me. quote: Do you think it means you aren't handling the pain the way he might want? I do have some reservations on it happening this way. So far (not in sessions), crying from pain is not from the pain it’s self; it’s because I start to think I’m being harmed. quote: I've sometimes tried to stop myself from crying because of some self-imposed ideal of what a good slave should be. If you don’t mind saying; why were you crying? quote: Crying can be a great release, and a bonding experience. Yes. I am wondering how different it would be from having someone trying to make things all better, by making me stop. Thank you for responding. :) k (who is still waiting for her day to... cry?)

TysGalilah -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 6:56:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira No, really; it’s something I have an urge to do while in a session with my owner, but I don’t know why; except for perhaps emotional release. I think there is more to it then that though. Furthermore, I don’t know how. I have tried to think of reasons why I would cry during a session; none of the reasons I’ve come up with seem to mesh with why I might want it. Does it matter for you? Also, if you have any thoughts on why the idea of wanting to cry in a session might be scary; I’d appreciate it. Best wishes, k I think tears are unexpressed emotions. feelings we don't have the words to express, or cannot. Perhaps you feel it is scary because you have a negative conotation attached to the release of tears.. Tears can flow without it meaning anything negative. Or perhaps you feel like you will need to explain them and do not know how. Or I have also heard others say they were afraid to cry for fear they wouldn't be able to stop once they started. ( another level of lack or loss of control of self and emotions). Sessions can get intouch with some pretty deep feelings at times. The tears can be cathartic in helping you purge something thats been stuffed down inside you for awhile. Those realizations can be scary once they are on the surface and out there. Perhaps, If you ask for your Masters help> some of these fears can be shared with him and his strength and control could help you change it from a negative to a positive and natural thing to do.

probablyknowme -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 6:58:42 PM)
I recently had an experience where I cried during a scene for the first time, and it freaked me out at the time. Then I, being the self-exploring person I am, spent some time examining the reasons behind it. I really think that I was on emotional and physical overload. The scene was very primal, and he kept pushing for more and more of a response. While crying is not something that I am comfortable with even having done it (maybe because I have done it), I don't think that it will freak me out should it ever happen again. I know that I am a crier in the rest of my life, so why would it not happen in scene? Just my quarter's worth.

laurell3 -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 7:06:17 PM)
I actually desire to be pushed to the point of crying personally. It isn't necessarily a negative emotion. It's an emotional release. I think having a conversation about it ahead of time and your expectations of how it will be dealt with to make sure it is the positive release type of crying as opposed to I'm really having a hard time here thing is a good idea.

charmdpetKeira -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 7:32:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss Crying is very intimate, it's letting go.... In doing wiitwd, it is natural to want emotional release - whether that is a deep belly laugh, intense orgasm, or tears. Your mention of emotional release has me thinking, there may be more then one reason for my wanting this. Usually I can get emotional release from simply having a session; I call it energy filtering. There is a good chance, crying is on my mind more these days, because I am not getting that filtering. quote: As for scary: well, crying is very intimate, it makes our skin blotchy, difficult to breathe, out of control, etc. Maybe one of these just isn't your cup of tea. I’m sure the idea of “instant need of a make over” doesn’t thrill me, but I’m thinking, once they’ve had you in some of those compromising positions… probably not what’s holding me back. Loosing control on the other hand, could hold possibilities. Question is, of what? quote: Or maybe crying is linked to something ugly in your mind or experience. We are very vulnerable when we cry and therefore easily convinced of what we are told. This level of vulnerability might be troublesome to you also... If you can let yourself experience and then write about it or talk about it after, you might find some truth. This is a very good idea. I will have to prepare for being able to do that. quote: I read your profile. Your journal entries suggest a certain discomfort with deep expression (not wanting to roar for example) Perhaps it is more than crying? smiles I think you are right. A time when I couldn’t cry and wasn’t allowed to “roar” came to mind while I read your words. I wonder what I’m afraid will happen. quote: Be patient with yourself. You will roar... and cry... a little at a time... or perhaps all at once. Thank you and I appreciate your reading my profile, even more so that you commented on it. I often wonder if people read that stuff and what they think of it. :) Best wishes, k

Gwynvyd -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 7:41:17 PM)
I find tears to be very cleansing. I also find them to be very sexy... I know when we have a session and my girl is moved to tears.. I feel blessed. I know she has given me every last bit of herself to me. Every last bit of emotion along with the physical. That means so much to me. Same goes for my boys... There is just that much more of a connection. I remember this one time after her and I really made love for the first time, and she was moved to tears.. it was so beautiful. smiles I am a blessed person that she is that free with me. I hope you can move past that and be totaly yourself. Gwyn

DesFIP -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 7:58:26 PM)
As the others have said, you can cry as an emotional release from other stresses, you can cry from the beauty of it, from the power of the emotional bonding, you can cry from an overload of pain, from hitting an unknown emotional trigger, or even a known one. However it can be tough on a top to suddenly have you bawling if it's never happened before. Tell him you've been thinking about this and ask if he can handle it and how for you two to communicate what's going on as to whether it's good tears or bad. Never hurts to plan ahead.

ChainedExistence -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 8:20:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira quote: ORIGINAL: ChainedExistence quote: I've sometimes tried to stop myself from crying because of some self-imposed ideal of what a good slave should be. If you don’t mind saying; why were you crying? k You know..some days things just HURT

ChainedExistence -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 8:33:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira quote: ORIGINAL: ChainedExistence Sometimes what is happening sort of puts you on emotional overload. You aren't necessarily crying from pain or sadness or fear, but you just get physically and emotionally overwhelmed. I think I would understand it better if it was a heat of the moment type thing, but this is something I think/have been thinking about for some time. I have specifically asked him to make me cry; though he hasn’t yet. quote: Heck, I've cried before because it was so incredibly awesome. Now that, sounds like a good reason to me. quote: As for it being scary... Are you afraid your tears might stop what is happening? Maybe, only from the stories he’s told me; he’s not afraid to do it and doesn’t seem as though he would be bothered by my tears, if I were not harmed. quote: Does it feel like a sign of weakness? I’m not sure, the idea of him seeing me cry, might bother me. quote: Do you think it means you aren't handling the pain the way he might want? I do have some reservations on it happening this way. So far (not in sessions), crying from pain is not from the pain it’s self; it’s because I start to think I’m being harmed. quote: I've sometimes tried to stop myself from crying because of some self-imposed ideal of what a good slave should be. If you don’t mind saying; why were you crying? quote: Crying can be a great release, and a bonding experience. Yes. I am wondering how different it would be from having someone trying to make things all better, by making me stop. Thank you for responding. :) k (who is still waiting for her day to... cry?)

briarrosethorne -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 8:45:20 PM)
i had, up until last night, NEVER cried in session... then all of a sudden...i just started to cry... in the 5ish years i have been playing i have never had a release like that... Someone one said to me that sometimes crying is more of/a better release than an orgasm...and i now have to agree...

sunshinemiss -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 8:50:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira Thank you and I appreciate your reading my profile, even more so that you commented on it. I often wonder if people read that stuff and what they think of it. :) Best wishes, k It was truly my pleasure... quite a nice little bit of writing... *smiles

charmdpetKeira -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 9:31:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mbes If I'm crying, then you have reached my soul. Can be a scary thought in it's self, yes? It's not something I do often, and definately not something I enjoy doing around others. Which makes it more curious to me. quote: Littlebitxxx, The closest I've come is a fit of hysterical giggles - in the middle of receiving oral of all things! giggles Sorry, must be contagious. :) quote: Ah well, XMaster said it was a sign of being comfortable enough to laugh, although my timing could be worked on. Your story reminds me of the time I lost it to the giggles. Actually that’s happened twice. The first time I was sooo embarrassed, but just couldn’t stop myself. The second; I was asking “OMG, are my nipples still attached to my body?!? quote: Actually, congrats on the crying...let it all hang out! Oh, I wish. 8) quote: TysGalilah, I think tears are unexpressed emotions. feelings we don't have the words to express, or cannot. These thoughts are strong in my mind. All of the responses, thus far, have been very helpful; the more I read, the more I am getting a handle on possibilities of why I’m afraid. I am also beginning to wondering if my fear is not the same as the reason I want it. Anyone know anything about regressive therapy? Ugh! These are also great precautionary ideas. I think I will ask him to read the thread, or perhaps we can do it together. quote: Probablyknowme The scene was very primal, and he kept pushing for more and more of a response. Do you feel you reached a point where you had no more to give, or did something else happen? Gwynvyd, Thank you for sharing; I often wonder what it is like from the D perspective of the situation. Especially since my owner told me, even before I started asking, making me cry is something that he plans to do. quote: DesFIP, from the power of the emotional bonding Sounds absolutely delicious. Thank you all. best wishes, k

charmdpetKeira -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 9:35:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss It was truly my pleasure... quite a nice little bit of writing... *smiles [;)]

probablyknowme -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 9:52:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira quote: ORIGINAL: mbes If I'm crying, then you have reached my soul. Can be a scary thought in it's self, yes? It's not something I do often, and definately not something I enjoy doing around others. Which makes it more curious to me. quote: Littlebitxxx, The closest I've come is a fit of hysterical giggles - in the middle of receiving oral of all things! giggles Sorry, must be contagious. :) quote: Ah well, XMaster said it was a sign of being comfortable enough to laugh, although my timing could be worked on. Your story reminds me of the time I lost it to the giggles. Actually that’s happened twice. The first time I was sooo embarrassed, but just couldn’t stop myself. The second; I was asking “OMG, are my nipples still attached to my body?!? quote: Actually, congrats on the crying...let it all hang out! Oh, I wish. 8) quote: TysGalilah, I think tears are unexpressed emotions. feelings we don't have the words to express, or cannot. These thoughts are strong in my mind. All of the responses, thus far, have been very helpful; the more I read, the more I am getting a handle on possibilities of why I’m afraid. I am also beginning to wondering if my fear is not the same as the reason I want it. Anyone know anything about regressive therapy? Ugh! These are also great precautionary ideas. I think I will ask him to read the thread, or perhaps we can do it together. quote: Probablyknowme The scene was very primal, and he kept pushing for more and more of a response. Do you feel you reached a point where you had no more to give, or did something else happen? Gwynvyd, Thank you for sharing; I often wonder what it is like from the D perspective of the situation. Especially since my owner told me, even before I started asking, making me cry is something that he plans to do. quote: DesFIP, from the power of the emotional bonding Sounds absolutely delicious. Thank you all. best wishes, k It was really that i absolutely had been pushed to my emotional and mental limit. But then I have said that I was either going to have the biggest orgasm of my life or cry...so it was a good thing.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: What Are You Crying For? (2/17/2008 9:57:51 PM)
Catharsis, or emotional release, happens all the time. My tribe practices spiritual SM...tust me...crying is very common. You need no other reason than you feel the need to do so. Master Fire

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