camille65
Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline
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Ohboy ohboy I just got a deadline I can't meet. which is in reality more like  Yah okies. 3 years ago this July I got divorced then was immediately bed ridden for almost 2 years. My house is a mess because my ex left holes in the walls and other good stuff, adding that I can no longer do housework or yardwork. The past two years I've been trying so very hard to pull it all into a semblance of order and make it shiny purty please buy me goodness. Slow going. Sloth slow. My parents are due back in the state IN 2 WEEEEEKS omg I didn't know. Ack. They are going to actually visit my house for the first time in 4 years and see all the stuff messy/wrong.So I am in a panic. How is it that a parent can reduce an otherwise sane (hahahahaha) adult into a 12 year old? They don't believe in Lupus or Fibromyalgia tho one sister has full fledged MS...*shrug* so they are going to lecture me upon laziness and again not living up to my potential yadda yadda. I must not cry because that simply isn't done in my family.As hard as I try to let go of the panicky stress it grips me even harder. I;m worried it will cause yet another time consuming flare up, delaying progress again. I tried to pay an old friend to help me pack stuff but that didn't work, I guess she didn't have time n stuff. I'm trying so damned hard to do all of this on my own, because I have to.But I'm not very good at this stuff, finding people to do stuff like new toilets and flooring especially cuz my budget is squeaky tight. Ah I'm just terribly stressed out and feeling desperate, but typing it all out has helped so thankies for that.
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~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).
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RE: I hate it when........ - 
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I hate it when my boss has me taking work home cause noone else is compentent enough to make a certain pain in my ass client happy :( prolly no sleep today for me .gif){kind=avatar}
He will help but only if it is done his way & his terms which means I have to 'prove' worthiness. The problem is that he is a real life Horatio Alger and accepts nothing less from others. I've never met anyone who has been able to do what he can yet he expects it from everyone. If I prove I am worthy (fixed house, painted. groomed 6 acres, weedless) then he is very happy to help. But if he comes over and sees anything out of place including chipped paint or stained carpet then in his mind I've not worked hard enough. Probably backwards and messed up but I am at physically and financially the lowest I've ever been. It is humiliating (not that fun sort) and difficult but it is what I have to do in order to earn his help. Okies I got 2 boxes packed this afternoon and I want to do another 2 plus Mount Laundry needs conquered! I'm okay. Just having a weak moment of rather grotesque neediness today. I try and keep it under wraps but it leaked out today.
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