atljerbear35 -> RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? (3/30/2008 4:51:02 AM)
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Hey, CountrySong (great name, btw), thanks for the supportive reply! There aren't many resources out there for the spouses or partners who suffer alongside their bipolar mates. When my wife was first diagnosed, she had to quit her job and go on disability. That insurance, along with my own, allowed us to seek out treatment options most folks can't afford, like ETC (electro-shock therapy, basically). This was the ONLY treatment that had any real success at dealing with her condition, because it dealt with the root problem, her biochemistry and brain synapses, rather than simply medicating her symptoms. We had almost 10 good years after that, but we both paid a price for it- the details are a little hazy after all this time, but as I recall, the treatments were done 3 times a week for about 3 weeks; they were done way up on the northside of Atlanta by a Dr. Aleem (God bless him!), which meant 2 hours of commute after working a 12-hour shift, and each treatment lasted 2-3 hours, so I didn't get much sleep that month. Plus, my wife lost almost all of her short-term memory for the entire month. The results, though, were spectacular by comparison to the "musical meds" (think of the children's game, "musical chairs") and switching shrinks games we had played for the previous 2 years. ETC is not a permanent solution, unfortunately, and had she remained on disability, we might have been able to afford it again. But being the honest idiots that we are, when my wife felt like she could return to the workforce, she did, and now we cannot get her re-admitted to the program, thanks to the "get tough" policies of the current administration. A LESSON FOR EVERYONE......... If you or your partner/spouse ever get on disability..... do whatever it takes to STAY on disability..... do not, I repeat, do NOT come off of it unless or until they KICK you off of it! If you play honest and by the rules, you will LOSE! It is far, far more difficult to get BACK on disability, than it is to get on it initially- and that's no picnic, either! So here we are, after nearly 20 years together, and what do we have to show for it? No savings, no retirement funds, chasing debt (yet again), and the only work I can get that brings in enough money to survive AND have health insurance is to be out on the roads for 2 weeks at a time driving an 18-wheeler! I feel more like a parent than a spouse to my wife (who is 9 years older than me, btw!!!), since I now must totally control all income and bill-paying while out on the road, and give my wife a small "allowance" each week for her to survive on. When I reflect upon all this, it's really no longer any surprise that I seek out women (and even other men sometimes) to use/abuse/and degrade me sexually, and especially sadistic women to further my explorations as a BDSM painslut! Retreating into "sub"-space (or even plain old porn!) is my only refuge these days from the insanity that surrounds- and often IS- my life! I'm just glad (and also sad) to finally know that I'm not the only one who has gone through this kind of hell, and that there are others still struggling with it today.
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