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RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/21/2008 1:15:21 AM

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You've already gotten some great advice here, a couple of suggestions that have worked for me in the past. Having an advocate on your side can make a huge difference. Contact your local NAMI chapter (www.nami.org) for help. An advocate doesn't have to be a lawyer, for instance, in my locale, specially trained peer mentors who know the system inside and out can do wonders. When you're feeling better, I recommend taking their Peer-to-Peer class, it gave me the perspective I needed to move my health into a better place. It teaches Mental Health Recovery skills, something I never found anywhere else.

When I was able to get a decent support system in place (I learned how to educate select friends and family to be what I needed), they helped me to see what the doctors had missed, that there was a lot of physical symptoms going on. I took them to appts and let them speak, things began to change over time and it turned out that the psychiatric symptoms were secondary to the physical illnesses that had been missed for years. I had to try over 20 psych meds to find the right one for me, so I've had to educate myself about psych meds out of self-preservation. I'm that one out of a hundred who has that extreme physical reaction.

Give yourself kudos for working, and in a stressful environment. You might want to think about things that help to reduce your stress level, do you need extra breaks, careful scheduling, etc. You can ask your doc for a letter to give to HR describing the accomodations you need, but make sure that it doesn't give your diagnosis, you don't need that to invoke ADA protection. I'm not working yet, but I'm hopeful. Soon, very soon....

Keep the faith!

Glowworm

< Message edited by glowworm -- 3/21/2008 1:16:18 AM >

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/21/2008 1:42:18 AM

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i just wanted to tell the op that i was on topamax which is what you are on i guess and it took about 5 weeks to really work and in fact the first two weeks i was kinda sick and couldnt eat and got sick in the mornings for like the 2nd into 3rd week i think it was....anyways after all that and nothing else EVER working i felt like i did in those moments when everything is great and it lasted for days on end. i want to go back on it now but am afraid due to my job i wont be able to, but my mood swings are getting on MY nerves even geesh...anyways stick to it and see but yep everyone is different. i was pissed later when found out yes its for seizures but they give it to people with schitzophrenia...thats all the info i found on it wasnt linked to bipolar in any way...(course that has been 6 years ago back when started so maybe has changed since then)....but then i said oh well it works so who cares what its for :)

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/21/2008 8:14:18 AM

MissAngelandsub

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Tegretol is different from Topamax I think either that or they have two brand names for it. Anyway, where I work they know I have bi-polar I told them up front so they would know if I am not in a good mood there is a reason for it. Without Tegretol I am very nice and happy person at work when I was taking it, it changed my personality and I can't have that because of the way it was making me, I actually kicked my husband out of my house twice over the two days I was off work because the medicine was making me very agitated and I felt like I had no feelings whatsoever and I can't/don't want to live that way. It is better to not be on meds if this is how the meds will make me.

(in reply to needsOwner)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/22/2008 8:49:52 PM

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bipolar I here.. unmedicated currently for the past 3 yrs after ECT treatments.. ive tried every med mentioned in this thread and of all of them tegretol and depakote were the worst 2 for me... everyone's different so this is only my 2 cents, take it for what it means to you.. for me, tegretol made me irritable in low doses and when they jacked them up it made me zone out.. i went from a major roller coaster to a flat plane... hated it.. i mean i may hate being at extreme ends of the mood madness but its good to have an occasional feeling.. depakote did the same thing..

when i got on a govt funded program, i was abilify and lamictal at the same time and they worked for awhile but eventually hit a suicidal rut and ECT was the only thing that worked.. had 5 treatments over 2 wks.. the change took a few wks but eventually kicked in and they let me go home..

now i wont say that i dont still have huge mood swings but they are manageable now.. i employ some of those endorphin and seratonin raising activities listed above and swear by them if a mood lasts too long.. good luck in your quest

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/22/2008 9:31:40 PM

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Wow! I just happened to glance down the homepage and saw a post on this topic, and couldn't believe my eyes. There are actually people talking about bipolar issues??? and specific stuff about meds??? What caught my eye the most was reading that someone has been off meds for over 3 years and has also gone thru ETC!!!! My wife is bipolar, and we've been struggling with this for over 15 years now, and I'm so sick of shrink guessing games and "musical meds", I could throw all shrinks into a hole and piss on 'em 'til they drown!!! ETC was the only treatment that had any real affect on my wife's condition, but even that's not a permanent solution! The timing of finding this discussion is almost eerie, as we have just decided as of last night to begin weaning her off ALL of her meds that are related to her bipolar condition. I've read that one way to define insanity, is to do the same thing over and over and over... and expect to get a different result! Well, no more! She's coming off the damn meds, and her shrink(s) can all go to hell! It can't be any worse than what she's been going thru lately, and after putting me thru 2 bankruptcies and now finding we're again(!!!!!) behind a full month on all our bills, this is quickly becoming a last-ditch attemp to save our marriage. I've stood by her for nearly nearly 20 years now, but even I have my breaking point... I can't go thru another financial meltdown and the pain and humiliation that comes with it. I'm just surprised, and in a wierd way glad, to know there are others out there fighting what we have been fighting, and suffering as we have suffered... misery loves company, eh? I hope the rest of you find solutions or at least ways to cope with your battles, but I'm really losing hope that our situation will ever change until I become actively suicidal and have to leave in order to save my own life.

(in reply to bornsynner)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/22/2008 10:45:41 PM

MissAngelandsub

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what is ECT?? I have never heard of it and the only thing I have ever been on that has ever helped me is prozac but I can't take the generic because of the fillers in it I am allergic to so I can't afford a med that costs several hundred dollars a month..... and the liquid makes me want to puke. I have seen bi-polar gone untreated for years my dad didn't even know he had it til I was diagnosed with it and it took me being on meds and him seeing a difference inme to actually beleive there was such a disorder. I have seen family memebers on drugs self medicating themselves and I have heard about it on my husbands side of the family as well as he has it also. It is a very difficult disorder to treat and I know how the mania does with the impulse control issue in the off postion and buying whatever catches your eye....but I do have to say atljerbear your wife may need to keep trying meds because if she is still manic and spending money like its water with meds think of how that will be off meds.....its a horrible disorder that can leave one emotionally and physically drained after a roller coaster of moods that is the main reason I am seeking meds to help I can't handle the tiredness after my emotions have been all over the charts in a matter of hours.....right now I am pretty much manic and I like it better than the depression but I can't forsee how this will tire me after I come down and I know sooner or later it will as it always does and i will be a crying sobbing mess. It sucks but I deal with it because I have no choice was trying to find some way to deal with the meds but seen that was no longer an option after the extremes I went to a few days ago. Hopefully one of these days people will find another med for bi-polar and bi-polar only that will work. Atljerbear if you want to talk on the other side feel free to email me :-) I have studied bi-polar like crazy and probably know more than I should about it but I have to be informed for my own well being and it seems there are more people with bi-polar out there than I ever thought I would know of and it is helpful to talk to people that have the disorder as well as talk with people that know about it.

(in reply to atljerbear35)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/23/2008 1:45:42 AM

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Thanks for the offer to email you. I'll take you up on it when I have some more free time, but it's incredibly late now, and I've got to get some sleep or be next to useless getting back on the road this evening. I'm also having to take complete control of ALL household income and before, bill-paying duties, which is a big-time stressor for me, and will take some time to adjust to. I'm sorry if I vented too harshly before, but I'm afraid I'm going to end up in a very bad way if I can't contain or control this current crisis... hell of a role for a submissive, hole, and novice painslut, ain't it? BTW- ECT is basically just electric shock therapy... the new and improved version, anyway. I'm sure you can google it for more and better info than I can give.

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/23/2008 6:31:53 AM

mastervalentine

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dollparts85

I have...but my psych does not listen to me. She claims it is working even though I have told her that it does not or is even making me worse. Last year, she refused to change my meds even though I was crying a good 6 or more hours a day and I was so anxious all the time and not sleeping. After two years or so of being on the same meds and being suicidal on and off, I finally had to admit myself into the hospital to have them change my meds. And she won't increase it now even though I am on the lowest dose of both meds.

... Re-read your post here, and tell me, does that sound like a trained professional? Sounds to me like you need a second opinion, and maybe a hug for having the patience of a saint. And, for the record, I'd be talking to a lawyer about medical malpractice -BEFORE- something happens that can't be undone.

A doctor, first and foremost, is supposed to address the needs and concerns of their patient. If what they're doing isn't helping you, and they refuse to listen or change it, you're well within your rights to speak up. More than that, medications like the type you need ... absolutely, and undeniably need constant monitoring! They're putting your life in danger, and acting like it doesn't make a difference!

(in reply to dollparts85)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/23/2008 10:20:16 AM

MissAngelandsub

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Its ok atljerbear I understand living with a person with bi-polar only thing is I am bi-polar as well so it adds a different aspect to it. I have not been in your shoes as to being late on bills because of over spending. I have always been poor so being late on bills is basically a normal occurance for me. :-) At least until I can get myhusband on disability...which will take time I know but its the best option for him in gaining any sort of income since he really isn't able to work. I hope things get better for you but as I said being on meds might be the best answer for her...I know how the mood swings are and I have a few things to say about them but I won't post them here. :-) Good Luck and keep in touch.

(in reply to mastervalentine)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/23/2008 10:33:51 AM

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yet another bipolar here, still working on my drugs as of now, recently left a relationship with a man who had bipolar/gen. anx. and add...

couple things: the "my doctor doesn't listen" ... take initiative. do NOT walk out of that office until they hear what you have to say. you have the right to get the correct treatment and if after 6 weeks you feel nothing, or if the side effects are more than you can handle, do NOT walk out without a new prescription in your hand for something different or a plan to slowly take you off the current meds to start a new one/set.

as for handling the time when your meds are kicking in, if you do not have a problem with addictions in your past, ask for something like xanax that will get you through the worst parts of it. it is an addictive drug, as are all the ones in that class, however sometimes they are necessary.

my current drugs: lithium, nardil, zyprexa, xanax.
i've been on about 8 different anti depressents, a few anti psychotics, a couple anti convulsants, my lithium and xanax have been constant for three years (in different doses) i've been to doctors that didn't listen to a word i've said and i've been to ones that thoroughly take into account my opinion on my treatment. if you cannot change doctors, take the initiative to look up each drug you are on, to look up similar classes of drugs and make suggestions. if they refuse to change your medication and your condition is not getting any better - be the bitch. this is your life. not theirs. you have every right to DEMAND a medication change if what you are on is not working.
sin

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/23/2008 10:44:45 AM

MissAngelandsub

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I have asked for some sort of anti anxiety med in the past becasue I have anxiety attacks, they say since I used to be suicidal they won't give me anything I can kill myself with. I have not been sucidal since I was a teenager but they don't seem to want to listen to that. My dad was on xanax and it helped him alot and I just wish sometimes that they would put me on it because well I have taken some without doctors approval but it helped and I can't just come out to a doctor and say i done this illegally but it helped..give me some please..lol..Right now I am still waiting for my doc to get back in touch with me. Hopefully they can give me a script for something else or I might even have to go back to the doctor and talk with her. I am going to try to talk to the mental health facility here and see if they have a program for people without health care.

(in reply to SinLee)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/25/2008 7:49:26 AM

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There is a program for people who don't have health care coverage... it's called the Republican Plan... they slap you across the face and tell you to "Snap out of it!"! LOL!

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/25/2008 9:05:08 AM

MissAngelandsub

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LOL

(in reply to atljerbear35)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/30/2008 2:42:03 AM

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Altjerbear I really feel for you. I struggled to get my EX (rapid cycling bipolar) the help she needed but I did not build wealth fast enough. I figured it would have taken $10,000 to $20,000 just to get her the proper treatment. She was on disability and the most common practice in our state is for them to see Nurse Practitioners. (The other common practice is to drug people to the point where they do not complain.) It took a while but we did get her to see an actual psych doctor eventually - she had to change agencies. Didn't help much just a year of playing with her meds and several trips to the emergency room for mania and suicide thoughts.

20 years is awesome. Bi-polar people only have about a 20% chance of keeping their LTR's together based on the stats I've read. I wish you luck. I would have stayed with my partner even though it was costing me all of the dreams we originally had together - kids, a nice home, financial freedom, etc. Not to mention the emotional hell at times (Always wondering if today is the day the love of your life will choose to leave this world is very hard to deal with.) She ended it by finding a new partner who was also on disability and did not have to work. Part of me still loves and misses her but I'm happier now. I hope it works out for you.

OP you'll have to fight for your rights. The system sucks and sometimes when you do fight they simply kick you out. They almost did that to my EX.

If anyone want to chat with me about bi-polar or alternative med feel free. My EX was on them for almost 7 months but it just got too expensive.
Peace

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/30/2008 4:51:02 AM

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Hey, CountrySong (great name, btw), thanks for the supportive reply! There aren't many resources out there for the spouses or partners who suffer alongside their bipolar mates. When my wife was first diagnosed, she had to quit her job and go on disability. That insurance, along with my own, allowed us to seek out treatment options most folks can't afford, like ETC (electro-shock therapy, basically). This was the ONLY treatment that had any real success at dealing with her condition, because it dealt with the root problem, her biochemistry and brain synapses, rather than simply medicating her symptoms. We had almost 10 good years after that, but we both paid a price for it- the details are a little hazy after all this time, but as I recall, the treatments were done 3 times a week for about 3 weeks; they were done way up on the northside of Atlanta by a Dr. Aleem (God bless him!), which meant 2 hours of commute after working a 12-hour shift, and each treatment lasted 2-3 hours, so I didn't get much sleep that month. Plus, my wife lost almost all of her short-term memory for the entire month. The results, though, were spectacular by comparison to the "musical meds" (think of the children's game, "musical chairs") and switching shrinks games we had played for the previous 2 years.

ETC is not a permanent solution, unfortunately, and had she remained on disability, we might have been able to afford it again. But being the honest idiots that we are, when my wife felt like she could return to the workforce, she did, and now we cannot get her re-admitted to the program, thanks to the "get tough" policies of the current administration.

A LESSON FOR EVERYONE.........
If you or your partner/spouse ever get on disability..... do whatever it takes to STAY on disability..... do not, I repeat, do NOT come off of it unless or until they KICK you off of it! If you play honest and by the rules, you will LOSE! It is far, far more difficult to get BACK on disability, than it is to get on it initially- and that's no picnic, either!

So here we are, after nearly 20 years together, and what do we have to show for it? No savings, no retirement funds, chasing debt (yet again), and the only work I can get that brings in enough money to survive AND have health insurance is to be out on the roads for 2 weeks at a time driving an 18-wheeler! I feel more like a parent than a spouse to my wife (who is 9 years older than me, btw!!!), since I now must totally control all income and bill-paying while out on the road, and give my wife a small "allowance" each week for her to survive on.

When I reflect upon all this, it's really no longer any surprise that I seek out women (and even other men sometimes) to use/abuse/and degrade me sexually, and especially sadistic women to further my explorations as a BDSM painslut! Retreating into "sub"-space (or even plain old porn!) is my only refuge these days from the insanity that surrounds- and often IS- my life! I'm just glad (and also sad) to finally know that I'm not the only one who has gone through this kind of hell, and that there are others still struggling with it today.

(in reply to CountrySong)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/30/2008 1:30:36 PM

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One possible suggestion is to try drinking a couple glasses of soy milk daily, it tends to be of great help to many women who go into post menopause as a result of sudden changes in hormone levels and suddenly start experiencing severe shifting of moods for myself it helped the moodswings and hotflashes dramatically within 2 weeks even though my hormone levels are still way out of whack according to bloodtests

not saying it will help for sure but can't hurt to try

_____________________________

Lead me not into temptation - I can find the way myself

(in reply to atljerbear35)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/30/2008 7:49:16 PM

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Valium and Xanax cause euphoria as a side effect of relieving the anxiety. Then you get anxious because you're not euphoric. We've given up trying to get my Dad to give Xanax up. He's hooked and won't go off and try noneuphoria effective antianxiety meds.

My daughter cycles between rage and suicidal depression every five minutes. She's on Lamictal which literally saved her life. And Seroquel which is primarily given for the severe anxiety disorder but also helps with the bipolar. Lamictal is an antiseizure med, since in effect both bipolar and epilepsy are caused by problems with the brain's processing of electricity, it makes sense that antiseizure's also help bipolar. Seroquel is an atypical antipsychotic but in the low dosages she takes, she doesn't get the side effects. She tried Risperdal and it worked but caused weight gain which is not conducive to lowering anxiety in an adolescent female.

She works part time during the summers and vacations. She's maintaining a B or Bminus average in one of the nation's top universities and she's in the top 100 nationally in her sport. She's been stable for about 4 years and has been fired by her adolescent psychiatrist because she no longer needs to see anyone but her GP to write the scrips. I'm fortunate enough to afford the medication cost but I live for the day they go off patent.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 3/30/2008 10:32:45 PM

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Altjerbear, I wished my EX had gone for ETC we talked about it but she was afraid of the memory loss. I did not know that it was only short term memory that was affected. Her new partner has had ETC.

Staying on disability is important. I changed jobs so I could learn the system and how to protect her and others in it. We were very careful to protect her benefits even though it ment not living together. It took me a year to get her off SSI and to SSDAC (which would have allowed us to live together but not marry). Then we had put together a five year plan to work toward SSDI so we could get married. Our back up plan was for me to become a millionaire so I could protect her no matter what happened. Unfortunately she quit on me about a year and a half before I reached that goal. I'm getting closer but it will still be about 9 months before I reach it.

Your saying that you work 2 weeks at a time driving an 18 wheeler scared the heck out of me and brought up a lot of pain. That's what killed my relationship with my EX. I took a position where I worked 1 week on 1 week off. She got lonely while I was gone (we talked every day by phone) and when she went mainc that was it! She found someone who could be there 24/7 for her. Almost three years down the drain without a rational thought.

I too felt like a parent often. Actually the word I used was caretaker. She hated that reality because she always dreamed of not having bi-polar and having a normal life. I still greive and blame myself for not building wealth fast enough to get her the help she needed. It is so hard to watch someone you love in pain and not be able to help them the way they need help. It's like one of those movies where the hero holds the heroen in his arms while she dies (Highlander the movie.) Only it lasted for years.

I also understand how you could be driven into masochism. I too walked that path. When her pain got so bad that she was suicidal or thinking about cutting I tried every form of release - guided meditation, hypnosis, walks in the woods. I also gave her a flog and let her release her pain unto my body rather than attaching her own body. I released it to God. To be honest the worst full body flogging was less painful for me than than the emotional pain we went through together. Now that she is gone I really do not crave that level of masochism. I guess I've regained part of my sanity and a greater sense of peace. I think I was slowly going insane while I was with her and trying to deal with helping her, working full time, and building a business. Way too much for one person to handle.

It still weighs on my heart that the next time I see her might be at her funeral but I had to live with that thought for a long time.

I remember we used to dream of creating a place out in the country with horses, dogs, and other pet. A place with a garden, stream, and pond. A place with a willow tree to sit under and lots of trees to hug. A place with a big barn for art and music. A place with all the holistic treatments for bipolar disorder - black out rooms, exercise center, biofeedback and other brain modification equipment, spirtitual alter, maze, etc. A place where our friends who had bipolar disorder could come, be safe, and heal. It was a nice dream but now that she is not part of my life I've let most of it go and focused on building wealth.

I still want a place in the country, horses and dogs. Most importantly I still want someone to love, have a family, and play with. At least if my next partner has bipolar I'll be able to afford the help she needs. One benefit is that I know I could be a great DaddyDom because of my experience with her.
I'll say a prayer tonight for you and the many other people here who suffer through this,
Peace

(in reply to DesFIP)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 4/1/2008 3:43:05 PM

MissAngelandsub

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Thank you all for your replies of support. It is very hard for us with bi-polar to find those that understand and support us. Right now my main focus is helping my husband his bi-polar is alot worse than mine and I am going to help him work on getting Disability so he doesn't have to worry about me being the only one bringing in money. Myself I can pretty much control my emotions enough anyway to help him. I am going to talk to my doc next week about finding a med that actually works besides giving me something that makes me think I am losing my mind. I am hoping I can find a generic prozac that won't make me break out in a rash or worse since I am allergic to one generic. I feel for you Atljerbear and CountrySong. I hope things get better for you both.

(in reply to CountrySong)

RE: Any Ideas on handling mood swings? - 4/1/2008 9:00:12 PM

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Good Luck MissAngelandsub,
My prayers and best wishes to you and yours on your search for the right med and your path through the system.
Peace

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(in reply to MissAngelandsub)

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