Underhanded trick or honest request? (Full Version)

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Hellacious -> Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 12:09:58 AM)

I received an onsite mail a little bit ago that took me by surprise. To sum it up another Mistress was asking me to train her slave because she had an unexpected trip taking her out of the country. The boy was a virgin to boot who had never been naked in front of a woman before. Aparantly she had just taken him into her keeping but couldn't fulfill the bargain.

My first instinct was that of caution. Call me a cynic but I smelled a trap. It is entirely possible that the letter came from the male in question who, by using this tricky angle, was attempting to worm his way under my care without having to jump through the usual hoops. And even if the situation was entirely true I have a hard time believing that a complete stranger would be willing to hand over her pet with no more knowledge of me than what was written in my profile.

After looking at the lady's profile, which did seem to be on the up and up and rather intelligently written, I made a polite reply declining her offer.

Now, my questions are these: Have any of you ladies seen something similar to this before? Now I realize that there is always a big margin for deception when meeting someone online, but are manipulations so common on Collarme that I should stick to my distrustful side? And what is your take on the situation to begin with?



AAkasha -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 12:14:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hellacious

I received an onsite mail a little bit ago that took me by surprise. To sum it up another Mistress was asking me to train her slave because she had an unexpected trip taking her out of the country. The boy was a virgin to boot who had never been naked in front of a woman before. Aparantly she had just taken him into her keeping but couldn't fulfill the bargain.

My first instinct was that of caution. Call me a cynic but I smelled a trap. It is entirely possible that the letter came from the male in question who, by using this tricky angle, was attempting to worm his way under my care without having to jump through the usual hoops. And even if the situation was entirely true I have a hard time believing that a complete stranger would be willing to hand over her pet with no more knowledge of me than what was written in my profile.

After looking at the lady's profile, which did seem to be on the up and up and rather intelligently written, I made a polite reply declining her offer.

Now, my questions are these: Have any of you ladies seen something similar to this before? Now I realize that there is always a big margin for deception when meeting someone online, but are manipulations so common on Collarme that I should stick to my distrustful side? And what is your take on the situation to begin with?


Yes, it's not uncommon for men to use a female profile and "offer" a slave to another femdom. The best way to sort through all the BS is to take it immediately to a phone call. You can at least verify if she is a woman and for real.

Even a guy can put together a believable femdom profile and steal the photos. You cannot be sure until you have a few conversations on the phone.

Akasha



Oumae -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 3:53:11 AM)

I'd be very suspicious too.

Even if true I'd be wary of someone handing over a sub to a stranger.

Oumae



MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 4:12:49 AM)

This has happened a couple times to me....a Dominant has contacted me online saying either they have a sub or know a sub and either want me to supply supplemental training or transfer ownership or something along those lines.

What I do is tell them that the sub needs to approach me without the dominant's involvement, and I will evaluate them on the same level as I would evaluate any other sub that contacted me regarding serving me. I tell them to have the sub send me an email introduction and I'll go from there.

To this day, I have never had one of these "recommended subs" follow up sending me the required email introduction.

<koff>

Yeah. I think it's yet another "angle".

I think handing your sub over to someone else to experience a specific scene or for training or for possible ownership is one of those things you need to keep to people you know real time reasonably well. I've interacted with other people's subs a number of times under those circumstances, and it's been fine....but the common thread was that they were ALL people I knew real time BEFORE such an offer/request came.



LadyAngelika -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 4:58:00 AM)

quote:

Have any of you ladies seen something similar to this before?


I had a similar offer a few months ago. A british woman wanted to send her slave to Canada to be trained by another woman to learn from another hand... variety I guess? Not sure the rationale.

I simply replied that I wasn't interested. If you are concerned about authenticity, you can always report the mail. Perhaps others have reported the same thing and this will help with eliminating scams.

I'm not saying that this is necessarily a scam. But I'd we weary of anyone who just offers her slave up. You'd think that she would be concerned about who would be dominating her boy. I know I would. Hell I don't even know if I'd let anyone else touch him, unless of course it was to co-dominate ;)

- LA



MstrssPassion -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 5:30:57 AM)

I have had this happen numerous times. I also agree that it is most likely a man with a female profile.

My reply is that I, in no way, will be involved with training of an already owned submissive. Firstly, if this sub were to form any attachments to said trainer... WHOOOPS (hell hath no fury like a woman scorned)

side note: been there done that ~ voice of experience ~ even in the most innocent circumstances persons involved in any form of power exchange can form a bond. In my case I was unaware of the sub doing so & was only made aware of it when he revealed it to his Mistress & she immediately lashed out at me.

I would also reply that I am seeking my own personal submissive(s) at this time & I do not have the time nor energy to undertake the training of a sub that belongs to another. On top of that, my personal style of training my not suit the needs of the Mistress that he/she belongs to in the end.

MstrssPassion



JohnWarren -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 6:54:54 AM)

[laughing] You know, I had something like that happen to me. Only it was a rich Nigerian who needs my help getting his money out of the country.

Seriously, I'd suspect that it may be a guy looking to "hook up." It isn't difficult at all to get a woman's picture and set up a fake profile. Even a phone call wouldn't completely reassure me. Back a few years ago when I was running Inner Explorations, I met a guy who did phone sex as a dominatrix with the aid of an electronic phone gadget that I understand is sold commercially. If I were a woman offered this "opportunity" and I had any interest at all of taking advantage of it, I'd want a LOT more checkable information on both of them.

At least it doesn't have the risk level of an offer I received about two years ago. Someone contacted me by email and asked for me to arrange a kidnapping/ravishment scene with no safeword. To keep it realistic, "she" said she didn't want me to meet or talk to her beforehand, but instead told me where she lived and where she hid a spare key to the back door.

I used an online directory to get the telephone number, called and had a very interesting talk with the woman there. She immediately removed the key and contacted the police. I never learned the upshot of what happened, but I'm betting on a former boyfriend.

Short summary... be careful.



MsPurrmeow -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 9:24:56 AM)


Yes, it happens quite often. It all comes tumbling down when it's time to actually have the bottom respond as a neutral human being. I've heard of these scams and had different variations come at me directly many, many times over the years. I've never, ever actually seen or heard of one that came to fruition. I suspect this is just another one of those "let's take this storyline as far as it will go" cyber dramas.

The part about saying that he is a virgin just seems to be chumming the waters, too. Someone is looking for a gullible catch. I know they are out there, but if a person cared for this "virgin" such a fact wouldn't be treated as a commodity.



KCMOLucky -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 9:48:53 AM)

I've actually had two such occasions that this has happened. One was a local Dom. He was considering a woman, and wanted to test this new girl on her limits, and he asked me for my help. I met him for dinner a couple of times, but the meeting his new girl part fell thru, because of a family emergency on my end. He was legit, and quite nice, too, I might add.

This second occasion is a little different, in the respect that it's a Female/female relationship, and the Domme has lent her submissive out many times before. I've spoken with her on IM and the phone several times, and am looking forward to, I don't know if this is the right, or best word, fostering her submissive as soon as I'm set up in my new place.

I guess my point is this; there are real people on here that enjoy crosstraining, as I have a tendancy to call it. Then there are those who are 'posers'. Your gut will tell you what you need to know.



MichelleFromHell -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 9:49:59 AM)

I'm going with all of the above. I too have many men trying to scam their way into my life by using all kinds of tricks:

1. I need to be rescued. She is holding me basically hostage. my reply, "Bullshit. Get out. If you need rescuing you have contacted the wrong woman."

2. Posing as females - why do you think I demand confirmation on Cam? You may be able to use fake stills, but live feed is hard to deny. This also works well for old farts who try posting young stud photos from their youth.

3. Having 'others' contact me. Unless they are someone I already know from the REALTIME community I consider them all bullshit.

4. Selling/promoting themselves as Dom and then begging me to allow them to submit. FUCK THAT. Either admit you are a switch or fuck on off.

You're not alone. We all go through it. M



lonewolf05 -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 11:04:23 AM)

i do..feel sorry..for what You REAL Ladies go through. i seen SOME of the mails my 1st Ms got in HER mailbox. it is SO sad the way SOME folks act in this world. and my shrink asks WHY i have trouble with my-fellow-man? oh puh leeeze...

wolf



brightspot -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 11:13:10 AM)

Never-Mind[&:]

*Brightspot



Misstoyou -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 10:19:42 PM)

Well, I was contacted by another local Domme through collarme, who offered me her boys for use. Not sure if I have anything but intellectual interest in why (I, personally, am not interested in sharing), but we've talked, and she and I are going to to meet for coffee when I'm back on my feet.



MissCassandra -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/29/2005 11:03:20 PM)

I got that same email ladies and lets face it, what we feel is usually what it is. In my opinion that email was bullshit bullshit bullshit. HAHA! Could he have been more transparant??? Whatever, people are always going to try for everything we just have to trust our instincts and not fall prey to bullshit. Goodluck. ;)



FelinePersuasion -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (9/30/2005 12:47:29 AM)

Actually you can fake being female on cam, or male for the fact. When my bf's over here I could put him on cam saying he was me and you'd never know if you'd never seen pictures of either of us before.



Misstoyou -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (10/1/2005 11:15:10 PM)

Taking this in a slightly different direction, and at the risk of sounding sexist, lol, how many of you have alarm bells go off, as I do, when I receive a one word message from a woman? Honestly, I just think that women are smarter and more socially savy than to write, "Hello," with nothing else.



JohnWarren -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (10/1/2005 11:28:27 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Misstoyou

Taking this in a slightly different direction, and at the risk of sounding sexist, lol, how many of you have alarm bells go off, as I do, when I receive a one word message from a woman? Honestly, I just think that women are smarter and more socially savy than to write, "Hello," with nothing else.


That has happened to me. I reply "Hello" and wait. Usually nothing.

Of course, short messages need not be red flags. On February 19, 1992, I received a message that read "I think we share some interests in common." Libby is a wonderful wife, lover and partner.




AAkasha -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (10/1/2005 11:41:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FelinePersuasion

Actually you can fake being female on cam, or male for the fact. When my bf's over here I could put him on cam saying he was me and you'd never know if you'd never seen pictures of either of us before.


People can go through extreme measures to carry out a carefully planned lie. If you think about it, someone could go through a lot of hoops to fake any number of things -- including pretending to be single and talking only on a cell phone and sneaking around successfully for months and months.

The bottom line is, though, that a great many scammers who are looking for some email thrills or hot cyber play will create a fake persona and the moment they have to put any effort into maintaining the lie, they disappear and move on to someone else. By requiring some proof, usually the fakers will vanish and that's all you need.

Sadly, the ones that really work on manufacturing a huge lie and keeping it are the ones that are scary. But if you demand proof pretty quick, you will get rid of many because they have not invested enough time to want to keep the lie going -- and they haven't had a chance to get attached to you.

Akasha



krikket -> RE: Underhanded trick or honest request? (10/2/2005 6:15:07 AM)

It seems to be the season (the upcoming All Hallow's Eve maybe?) for strange emails. i received one last night from a young man who wants to fly me up to NJ. He wants a real body to practice using his new whip on, and learn how to fist, and a few other things.. because the older woman he's interested in says he doesn't have enough experience for her. (He's 23, she's 25, and not even gonna consider what 55 is to him...lol)

i still haven't figured out the angle yet -- other than just an "easy" way to get a sub -- which considering the distance, money, etc., just doesn't make sense to me... but.. the whole thing is a big strange. It did, however, give me a giggle..which was a nice way to end the evening...

cheers
jimini






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