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Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 5:55:03 PM

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Can you tell the difference and is there a difference? Atrraction or Fetish?
I don't get it. I am drawn to hair, hairy chests, legs, arms, heads, faces and I don't think there is a cure I can take for it. If Big Foot, Teen Wolf, Wolverine or a Werewolf-man were to come to my front door step, I'd be a goner. Is this a normal attraction or is this a fetish? Does anybody else have a certain je ne sais quoi. 'I do not know what'; indescribable attractive attribute or quality; 'a certain something'.??? Quel dommage...

RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:02:48 PM

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Not sure that i'd call these things fetishes at all, but they are the specific physical things that i'm attracted to in a big way.

*Long hair (stems from my early childhood i'm sure)

*Goatees

*Hands are a big thing for me, don't ask me why, i do not know...and it isn't anything specific, someone either has hands i love or i am not jazzed about....i do know i much prefer big hands....they can be neat and clean or they can be dirty and calloused.....the fingers make a difference, but i honestly don't have a "type", they're either great hands or not.

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:03:26 PM

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If the guy was hairy but unwashed and a drug addict, would you still want him? We all have physical attributes we prefer in partners. But a fetish means that by itself is a turn on.

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:04:41 PM

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Okay, this is one of those things about popular BDSM that kinda bugs me: people constantly misusing the term "fetish."

A fetish, my friends, is when you can't sexually perform unless the "magical" object or fantasy is present.

A paraphilia is when you have a strong attraction to a particular person, place or thing, or fantasy. So much so that it becomes your preferred means of achieving orgasm. However, if push comes to shove (as many of us often hope it does, LOL) you CAN get off in a "vanilla" manner if that's the only avenue open to you.

The vast majority of folks in the BDSM scene are actually paraphilliacs... sometimes I think they just use the term "fetish" because it saves keystrokes, and is easier to spell. LOL

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:04:55 PM

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Does it really matter how it is called, when it makes you feel good?

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:09:49 PM

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It probably doesn't. It just bothers me, because as a sub, it often saves your hide by being... "detail oriented." LOL I think I've been trained to be slightly anal about such things.

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:15:01 PM

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I believe understanding the definition of the terminology used is important. I do not have any "fetishes". And I choose to use that word anyhow, knowing what it means because I like the word.

In being technically correct though, I am drawn to certain things but they are not necessary in and of themselves to get me off. One of them would be words though, so I purposefully choose to misuse them. I am not actually a slut, but I lvoe the word and love to be called one. I am not actually a masochist by the true definition of the word, but it pleases Daddy adn therefore pleases me to be called one.

One of my favorite "fetishes" would be cocks, love them in all shapes and sizes and all states of arousal, but they do not have to be around for me to acheive orgasm.

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:16:21 PM

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Thank you for your answers. I am new at this and I do not know anything. Thanks again, waves :)

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 6:57:20 PM

SirJohnMandevill

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quote:

ORIGINAL: zeebra

Can you tell the difference and is there a difference? Atrraction or Fetish?
I don't get it. I am drawn to hair, hairy chests, legs, arms, heads, faces and I don't think there is a cure I can take for it. If Big Foot, Teen Wolf, Wolverine or a Werewolf-man were to come to my front door step, I'd be a goner. Is this a normal attraction or is this a fetish? Does anybody else have a certain je ne sais quoi. 'I do not know what'; indescribable attractive attribute or quality; 'a certain something'.??? Quel dommage...

I'd call it an attraction. Sounds as if you're looking for the man beneath the hair, rather than getting off on the hair itself.

I'm not in your head, so perhaps it's not that simple....

Les (Purveyor of Fine, Hair-Impaired Kink)

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/22/2008 8:15:01 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddyncherry
*Hands are a big thing for me, don't ask me why, i do not know...and it isn't anything specific, someone either has hands i love or i am not jazzed about....i do know i much prefer big hands....they can be neat and clean or they can be dirty and calloused.....the fingers make a difference, but i honestly don't have a "type", they're either great hands or not.

i have a huge thing for hands.. specifically, i love hands big enough to hold my wrists.. i get to prick ppls fingers all day at work and im always sizing ppls hands up.. not in an obvious way but i love thinking about a mans hands around my neck, my wrists, my ankles.. or even across my bottom ...

yeah yeah it may not be a technical "fetish" but damn i do have a definate attraction for a certain kind of hand

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/23/2008 4:28:45 PM

BikerDomRealTime

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quote:

ORIGINAL: zeebra

Can you tell the difference and is there a difference? Atrraction or Fetish?
I don't get it. I am drawn to hair, hairy chests, legs, arms, heads, faces and I don't think there is a cure I can take for it. If Big Foot, Teen Wolf, Wolverine or a Werewolf-man were to come to my front door step, I'd be a goner. Is this a normal attraction or is this a fetish? Does anybody else have a certain je ne sais quoi. 'I do not know what'; indescribable attractive attribute or quality; 'a certain something'.??? Quel dommage...

My understanding of a fetish is that it is something that is needed for sexual gratification.

(in reply to zeebra)

RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/23/2008 4:34:44 PM

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I always thought a fetish was something ordinary, any object or item that isnt sexual, but somehow triggers the mind to think of it as a sexual stimulus? like the shine of the leather or smell ?

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/23/2008 4:38:50 PM

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Here is what I would consider a good definition and discussion.

Cali

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RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/23/2008 4:56:01 PM

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Excellent, and incredibly difficult question to answer.

I'm attracted to eyes, and of course..."the look".

I can't tell you what "the look" is...but when a woman does it....I'm chopped liver.

There's one woman who has both the eyes and "the look"...and I'm fucked every time I look at her.

(in reply to zeebra)

RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/23/2008 5:05:36 PM

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Technically, a fetish is the use of a nonliving object that is used for sexual gratification over a period of time, to the point where arousal is unable to be achieved without the particular object. Attraction is more along the lines of certain personal (human) stimulus that triggers a sexual response.

(in reply to Griswold)

RE: Attraction or Fetish? - 3/23/2008 5:14:18 PM

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Sexual fetishism is the sexual attraction to material and terrestrial objects while in reality the essence of the object is inanimate and sexless. Body parts may also be the subject of sexual fetishes (also known as partialism) in which the body part preferred by the fetishist takes a sexual precedence over the owner. Sexual fetishism may be regarded as a disorder of sexual preference, or as an enhancing element to a relationship.

hope this helps.

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