Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Is A Contract Necessary?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Is A Contract Necessary? Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Is A Contract Necessary? - 4/2/2008 3:46:09 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
DV, whilst you might have a point in a litigious society like the USA, not all of us live in that situation.. Over here in the UK, with the legal situation as it is a contract wouldn't be worth the paper it is written on. Being listed as her next of kin, etc gives many of the things you maybe 'need' a contract for over there (Even then from speaking to Americans much of it can be worked the same way even over there.)

Bottom line though, you need a contact to control those aspects... I don't, I control the girl and that gives Me control of all else!

< Message edited by RavenMuse -- 4/2/2008 3:50:32 AM >


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to DarkVictory)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Is A Contract Necessary? - 4/2/2008 4:28:15 AM   
Indemnis


Posts: 179
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline
Nothing is absolutely necessary or even unnecessary.  There are no world-wide general written rules and guidelines.. as with most things, needs and wants vary from person to person, from relationship to relationship.  He told you what will be expected of you, what he wants, and that you don't need a contract... why do you still want to know if you need one?  Personally, I feek a contract to be entirely unnecessary and even a little impractical, at least in the context you seem to me to be referring to it as.  What could possibly be in a contract that he would be unable to express to you?

_____________________________

No-one respects the flame quite like the fool who's badly burned-- Pete Townshend

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Is A Contract Necessary? - 4/2/2008 4:40:56 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
DV, If you are simply 'playing' at being at Ms relationships, maybe a contract does have significance.  But apart from the fact that they are not legally enforcable, they are simply a set of rules, stipulations, protocols, etc.  Whether that is written or not is down to individuals and whether they can carry them out with any maturity.
 
But suggesting a written agreement other than a will may be legally enforcable is very misleading.  For power of attorney you need stronger 'evidence' or reason than 'shes is my slave' - earnings etc would be extremely difficult to uphold in court.  That is basic lala land.  As for medical, next of kin would be advisable, but these are nothing like a contract that people seem to be talking about.
 
A contract does not have to be written out - verbal work with equal legal stats as written - written slave contracts are not legally enforcable at the present time.  If they work for an individual, great - use them.  But if the Master doesn't see them as needed, they are not. Period.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________


RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to DarkVictory)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Is A Contract Necessary? - 4/2/2008 5:58:36 AM   
Archer


Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline
Comming from the advocating contracts side, I have to say the contract itself is not enforceable legally, and most certainly trying to enforce it legally will likely draw down more legal problems than it solves. The benefits I see in the contract are not the ones people generally push to the front of the debate.

The idea that you are writting a contract for yourself has the tendancy to force people to slow down and really think about what they are agreeing to. This is the biggest benifit I can think of.
Personal Judgemental Opinion Warning: wooooooooop  wooooooooopppp wooooooooop
Far to many folks allow the romance of a new relationship to override their common flippin sence and agree to things that sound wonderfully romantic while discussing them on the pillows. Shifting to a less flowery, more stark reality, more cold and calcualting process can help reduce the problem of "I never thought he would order me to do this now I feel abused".
When the reality catches up and the romance hearts and flowers wears off and reality of who each of you are when not wearing that very best behaviour mask slaps you in the face, you may find yourself wishing you had slowed down and thought about who you were accepting responsibility for, and who you were turning your future over to.

They are cold and calculating things contracts they are so anti romance and trust, exacty what some people need to counter the emotional high of a new relationship. Can they do this without a contract, certainly but will they? Will they take the time?
Will they take that hard look?

If the contracting process did absolutely nothing more than slowing someone down during that time, I think it would be worth it.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Is A Contract Necessary? - 4/2/2008 6:02:34 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
Comming from the opposite side to Archer on this, I've no problem at all with the way HE presents it.... useful for some including Himself, it suits His style. I do the same 'slowing down, clarifying, double checking' in discussion without the need for a contract. Talking through with the girl the realitys of what every decision being accountable to Me actualy entails in the context of day to day life.... that simply suits My style.

To Me it isn't a case of "will they"... I make them :)


< Message edited by RavenMuse -- 4/2/2008 6:03:34 AM >


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to Archer)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Is A Contract Nessecary? - 4/2/2008 6:59:49 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddyslilpookie

Hi, I married to my Master and I his slave, my question is, is a contract nessecary? I have asked Master and He says we don't need one. I asked him well, I want to know what is expected of me as his slave. He said do my chores, take care of our daughter and be obedient to him. Do you think a contract is necessary for us? Do many married D/s couples have contracts?

Isn't marriage the best contract there is between a D/s?

All sorts of people have a contract, and others don't what do you think that it will add to your relationship hon?

you can look online what it means,
then discuss it with your Master.

I wish you enough.

GoddezzT`


_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to Daddyslilpookie)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Is A Contract Nessecary? - 4/3/2008 2:44:25 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
A contract is essential for me. If I do not lay out what I want, then I often do not get the results I desire. That doesn't make me happy. I also want my slaves to know exactly what to expect in the relationship and from me. So, I've actually written a manual. Doing it this way isn't for everyone. If you're feeling lost, talk to you Master about clarifying some rules.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Daddyslilpookie)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Is A Contract Nessecary? - 4/3/2008 12:20:03 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
If a submissive feels they need a contract to spell issues out clearly, before they are collared, then that's exactly what they need.  The contract may be the one thing the submissive needs to feel they have communicated their desires clearly. 



If a Master states He doesn't want/require a contract but the sub/slave only believes they have 'communicated their desires clearly' by having one and wants to 'insist' then they may as well call it quits there and then as there is neither the level of communication nor trust in that relationship to build much on.

IMO of course.



Amen. The tail should not be wagging the dog.


I think it's an issue of compatibility.  If the potential owner isn't willing to entertain the importance the contract carries for the slave, to the point where he says "no contract, take it or leave it" obviously the balls back in the slaves court.  She decides if she genuinely wants that collar or not, ultimately. 

As I've often said, I don't use a contract with my slave.  But for the girl I'm working with, I'd explain what contracts are, and the value they might have, so that she knows all of the tools that can be used.

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Is A Contract Nessecary? - 4/3/2008 2:17:19 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
The question, as I understood it based on your "couldn't disagree more" statement, was whether or not a Master knows what is best for his slave.  If she does not trust that he does, then they have the potential of always battling the road of will. 

In this particular case, she is already his slave.  He has given her his decision, and she has taken it to the discussion board to ask us about it.  Since they are married and already Master and slave, do you still disagree that he should not decide what she needs?  Do you feel a slave should adapt to the will of her Master? Your posts on this thread confuse me.  What is it you are particularly disagreeing with in this situation?


_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Is A Contract Nessecary? - 4/3/2008 3:01:39 PM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddyslilpookie

I want to know what is expected of me as his slave.

He told you what is expected of you, as his slave. 
quote:

He said
do my chores,
take care of our daughter
and
be obedient to him.

This can be considered an oral contract.  You can write it down on a piece of paper, if that would help. 
 
quote:

Do you think a contract is necessary for us? Do many married D/s couples have contracts?

Any two (or more) people can make a contract with each other.  There are marriage contracts, prenuptial contracts, and postnuptial contracts. 
 
Personally, i don't feel a contract is necessary in my relationship, but if my Master wanted to create one for me, i would happily accept it.  You and your Master need to figure out what's necessary in your own relationship. 
 
joy
Owned servant of Master David

(in reply to Daddyslilpookie)
Profile   Post #: 50
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Is A Contract Necessary? Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.082