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MojoRisin -> Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 11:57:59 AM)


To the submissives,

Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time? Never really break rules? Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid? Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?




EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 11:59:46 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MojoRisin
Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time? Never really break rules? Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid? Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?

No, but I'm curious to the reasoning behind this. Are you trying to justify disobedience from a mature stable adult who willingly consented to obey in a relationship that is BASED UPON an authority dynamic versus a person who is growing and learning and struggling to go beyond their current state which simply has an authority dynamic as a side effect of the structure?




MojoRisin -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 12:10:24 PM)


I sort of understand the question. I was just wondering if the behavior starts in childhood and if the need for approval seeped into those types of relationships as a kid.




subspaceinMD -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 12:13:04 PM)

i for one have always been a people pleaser (listening and doing what i was told). i have always worried about others before myself and only in this lifestyle can fully appreciate what i am about.




sub4hire -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 12:16:57 PM)

quote:

I was just wondering if the behavior starts in childhood and if the need for approval seeped into those types of relationships as a kid.


I've always followed the beat of my own drum. It had no limits. Always wanted to stand by myself. I didn't necessarily follow the rules of my parents as they had very few.

Did I break the law? In ways, yes. I've had a following since I was a very young child, I still have that same following. I guess, what I am saying is I was a born leader and I've never taken that for granted. I was the kid whose friends parents wanted their kids to be with. They knew I'd take care of their children.

However, with certain people I can date back to my earliest memories of a 3 year old. Things I did, not necessarily wrong. Although asked in later life why I did them. My response has always been the same. I was told to do it.
Never questioned certain people in life. Where other's that's all I've done is question them.





Quivver -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 12:44:30 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MojoRisin


To the submissives,

Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time? Never really break rules? Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid? Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?


Obey? of course....... to enough of a degree that was necessary, yet long ago I learned
to see the holes in the spoken word. It was the holes that let me dance to my drummer,
to develope and grow. If they were still alive to ask I think they'd say although I was a
mischievous (sp?) one I was a pretty good kid all in all.

Q




EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 12:56:26 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MojoRisin
I sort of understand the question. I was just wondering if the behavior starts in childhood and if the need for approval seeped into those types of relationships as a kid.

Behavior is not the same as orientation. Many great dominants were/are successful in the armed forces where the need to follow orders and understand rank is a huge deal.

Yes, many subs are people pleasers, but I don't see a need for approval any higher in subs than I do in doms actually. Yes, many subs orient themselves as such from an early age.

But obedience to pre-determined authority figures such as teachers or parents is a bad indicator of such. I had some teachers I'd walk to the moon for (they were young and hot and really smart) and some teachers who I only went to class for because I needed a scholarship to get to college and didn't know yet how to confront authority without losing what I wanted. My mother thought I was the paragon of perfection, and in many ways I was...but she also didn't know a lot about my sex life and I did lie and break rules in order to keep it that way.




plantlady64 -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/4/2005 1:05:04 PM)

Hello There,
I went to private Catholic School. We were very afraid to act up or speak out. We all did the best we could to fly under the radar those nuns had. We obeyed out of fear of physical punishment at our school.

At home from age 10 I was the Cinderella gal. I did all the housework, cooking, and running for things like drinks or cigarrettes for my Parents and was called a "lazy good for nothing bitch" by my Mom constantly. I was very submissive to both my parents. There reached a point where I had a fit and put my foot down about my Dad molesting me at age 16. I was put out of our home and homeless behind me having a fit about the innapropriate contact even though my Dad agreed he'd been abusing me.

Overall I was not a rock the boat girl & tried very hard to be all the things others expected me to be.
Sincerely,
sub suzanne




ElektraUkM -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 4:26:21 AM)

I really like rules and structure and always have. I like order, and really dislike disorder, surprises, things going haywire. My character is such that if there's a disordered situation, I'll take it upon myself to whip some order into it. I'm naturally bossy [:D] and capable, and if there's a crisis and no-one is taking control, then I'll be the one at the helm in no time at all.

Of course that wasn't possible when I was a child. I didn't share a lot of the values or opinions or beliefs that my parents (or other authority figures) did, so even as I obeyed them, I felt uncomfortable doing so. I've always questioned everything, and I have no doubt I've disobeyed and broken rules of various kinds all my life ~ as long as it doesn't cause complete disruption for the sake of it. I've always longed to be a part of a world where I could be more of a submitter, less of a bossy type, but not lived in it because of the discrepancy between what I believed in and what those in authority over me believed in.

Now that's all changed. I have found someone I can trust and believe in, whose values match mine... Something I always wanted when I was a child but didn't experience. It's taken quite a while to find him.

~ Elektra




imtempting -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 5:07:35 AM)

Ive always followed the rules at school and at home. I always liked to please people.

I did have a rebellious streak and still do. Ive broke many rules but ive never been caught hehe




littleone35 -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 6:01:32 AM)

i usually obeyed my parents but i had a habit of questoning them about things they told me to do sometimes. As i got older i did not adked i understood did not always do it but i understood.

littleone




RaeRae39 -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 6:07:20 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MojoRisin


To the submissives,

Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time? Never really break rules? Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid? Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?


Wow, what a good topic for a thread~! And as usual great responses...For me, I'm a pretty multi faceted person. To some in my life, like the ones I loved dearly, I would and do go beyond what is expected of me, even as a child,..to behave,..to do my chores, and not make myself appear to be a pain in the ass. {my parents were young and did a lot of partying!}
Yet I was rebellious as well, but, I think that goes with getting to know yourself in your younger years. I know as soon as I hit catholic school it began~! I hated it, was always in trouble even going nose to nose with the principle, needless to say, of course I got kicked out. I was the kid that no one wanted their kid to hang out with,lol. But, when it came to people I loved and cared for, well I would do anything for them.
I have no idea if any of this makes sense. But subSusan and I have a very similar upbringing, so I can relate. I think a lot of us subs my have childhood influences, or even hardwired for our behaviors, traits.
Raerae




ChereeAmoor -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 8:15:28 AM)

Did I obey my parents all the time? No.

Did I obey my teachers all the time? No.

Never really break rules? Yes, I broke rules.

Did my parents encourage me to rebel? No.

Obedient to an unreasonable point? No.





OsideGirl -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 9:33:55 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MojoRisin


To the submissives,

Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time? Never really break rules? Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid? Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?


Absolutely not. My parents had a very hard time with me. I wasn't a crappy kid, but I did things my own way. ie: I skipped school - a lot. However, I made Honor Roll, National Honor Society and Music Honors.


I do not have a submissive personality. I liken myself to a Lioness. She's strong, smart, cunning and a provider. The only one that she submits to is the Lion who has proven his dominance and claimed the pride.




Mercnbeth -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 10:52:00 AM)

quote:

Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time?


parents---until the ripe old age of 13, you betcha.

teachers---heck ya, that paddle up there in the principal's office was enough to keep 95% of us in line without it ever having to come off the wall!

quote:

Never really break rules?


didn't make a career of it, but broke an occasional rule. broke a really important one regarding fire safety once. it was the one and only time this slave was sent to "pick a switch".

quote:

Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid?


No way. They always expected us to act like little adults~"being a kid" was reserved for those 6 and under.

quote:

Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?


this slave's parents expected obedience......it was unreasonable to be dis-obedient.




RainGod -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 10:54:24 AM)

Possibly in the very beginning of life I obeyed and respected blindly, and without question.

I was a good son, a scout ( neat knots they taught us, huh?), and I suppose a fairly lovable kid.

When I reached early teens, I began noticing blatant hypocracy and double standard ruling of many of those in 'positions of authority' over Me. It was around that time I began to question authority, and not simply respect someone because they were older than Me, or because I had been told I should.

No, this does not mean I was a total hoodlum.... I was half a hoodlum. lol. Seriously, even when I was in the military and working law enforcement, I had no problem respecting the command structure or the authority of the officers and NCO's above Me. Sometimes I had no respect for the man in the uniform, so I would merely think of it as respecting his rank... or just the uniform.




quietlilone -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 2:59:53 PM)

Good question but a tough one to answer fully. As a kid I always wanted to be certain everyone around me was happy, so I tried my best to make it that way. I was a very good student and behaved in all classes obeying all teachers even through high school. I was taught to respect and obey my elders so in my mind I really had no choice but to do just that.
As far as my parents go...my dad is a peacher, so as a child I obeyed to the letter for fear of him and God. As I progressed into my teen years I was a typical PK and rebelled when I could, but never directly infront of him or any spot within ten yards.
I think that it is natural for kids to test limits. It's part of the learning process, and disobeying is one way to do that. I'm not saying it's a good way or the right way...just a way.




ownedjulia -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 3:21:41 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MojoRisin


To the submissives,

Did you all obey your parents and teachers all the time? Never really break rules? Did you do it to a point where your parents actually encouraged you to rebel a little bit, or be a kid? Point being, were you obedient to an unreasonable point ever?



As a child and even as an adult I was boringly bookish. I had to achieve goals my parents set for me. Once I did achieve them and I got my freedom from them I went a bit wild I have to admit and now i find that i need that harsh control and guidance again.




SimplySubmissive -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 3:47:40 PM)

I was quite a rebel, and militant feminist in high school. no man was ever going to tell me what to do.

wow.

looking back, i don't think i really wanted it that way, but didn't know any men who were "good". men deserving of respect and obedience.

thank god for the wisdom that comes with time, and life experiences.




mystictryst -> RE: Parents and Teachers (10/5/2005 9:40:42 PM)

I am and have always been an extreme people pleaser...

However, I had a difficult time with teachers and my parents. I was a terror as a youth.

I remember failing french class in high school because I skipped school all the time; when the teacher brought me in to discuss my failing grades, I purposely wore a snug, low cut sweater, produced tears, and seduced him into passing me... When my parents tried to discipline me for my outlandish and inappropriate behaviour, I caused them so much terror, running away, threats.

I'm afraid to admit I used to be extremely manipulative...

When I first heard my Master's voice, something in me clicked. I wanted to be different, I needed to be different for him. My entire world changed when I met him.

The biggest problem I encountered my entire life is the trail of dissapointment I've left in my wake, I need to please, even when I was rebelling, so the worse I was, the more I was awful to myself inside. Growing to hate and loathe myself to the brink of sanity. Master really helped save me, and I know it isn't fair to credit him with that (we went through the whole pedestal issue)... He enabled me to focus and dedicate myself to something else.

I digress...

To answer shortly, I was never submissive until I met my Master and it's a good thing I did. :)






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