Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm??

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Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/19/2004 10:58:52 PM

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Hello Again!
Just wondering, Which came first?? Was it that You where Vanilla, then came into the Bdsm lifestyle? Or was it that You where always Bdsm??

Sincerely, eyesofAslave

quote:

"No I'm not affraid of Who's behind the Door~"

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/19/2004 11:57:20 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: knees2you

Just wondering, Which came first?? Was it that You where Vanilla, then came into the Bdsm lifestyle? Or was it that You where always Bdsm

I don't consider myself part of the "bdsm lifestyle". I have a life, not a lifestyle;bdsm is just one part of it and not the defining factor.

That said, I can't remember not having power/pain fantasies. I was fantasizing about pain before I even knew what sex was.

I started having sex when I was 14 yrs old, and knew there was something missing. I was actively looking for bdsm when I was 14 yrs old, and actively doing it when I was 16 (took me that long to find a fuckbuddy with any real interest, or I'd have been doing it sooner).

I've always been Sherri, and this is the way Sherri is wired.

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-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 1:05:46 AM

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From: New Castle, PA
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depends on how you want to define it

had no interest in bdsm until I was about 8 or so

after that, had a lot of interest in it, even though I didnt know what it was called then

so depending on where you draw the starting line (birth? puberty? age of majority [usualy 18]? other?), I was either first vanilla and then came into BDSM, or I have always been into BDSM

there is another thread here on the boards (help proudsub!!!!) that might interest you, something along the lines of First thoughts of BDSM

Apply usual caveats here

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Apply Usual Caveats Here

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(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 7:31:26 AM

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I had always known that there was something "Odd" about me. I was 5 or 6 when I had my first erotic dream about what I saw as a "Lady in shiny black." I don't know where I saw a catsuit prior to this dream.... but there it was. I was always quiet in school, kept to myself, avoided confrontation... but underneath ..there was this current. This surging. I didn't get into fights because I was taught "Not to hit." Hey...I listened. I was that hopeless romantic in highschool...the nice guy...because I was taught to respect women and treat them like a gentleman. (I'll touch on that one i a bit...) Again...that current was flowing...telling me to just grab that little bitch by the hair...and...oh yeah...I'm getting off track...

I was always turned on by the leather..latex...ropes...chains... but didnt really find myself..My REAL self until about 6 years ago. Thats when I started reading BDSM material. Thats the first time in my life, I had read something that had such an impact on my very soul. It identified those "Odd" feelings that I had. I didn't really discover my Sadistic side for a few more years..but anyway.

There's my long, drawn out answer to a short question.

BDSM came first for me. I just didn't know it at the time.

~Thorns

_____________________________

~"Do you know what the chain of command is? Its the chain I beat ya with when ya don't follow my command."

"My inner child is a mean little fucker"

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 7:49:04 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

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From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrThorns
I was 5 or 6 when I had my first erotic dream about what I saw as a "Lady in shiny black."

If having a "thing" for Catwoman counts, then the Adam West Batman television series must have created a generation of kinky men. *smile*

My own first erotic thoughts revolve around the James Bond movies. I was completely fascinated with the naked sillouettes that swam or gambled during the opening credits. I loved the Bond girls. I loved the way James Bond would simply take them, friend or foe.

I didn't discover my kinky side until I discovered that my kinky side had been named and written about quite extensively. 8 years later I am still figuring out what makes me tick.

Yours,
Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to MrThorns)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 8:00:27 AM

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Knees2you-
I would have to say that I have ALWAYS been a submissive woman. When I was younger, (and even now sometimes

) I always toyed with the idea of being a 'captive princess.' Anyhoo- Around 18 I found out about the book 'Different Loving' and devoured it. When my ex-husband and I separated 3 1/2 years ago, I started reading everything BDSM related and was a fairly active member of bondage.com before I found this site. To answer your question, I have always been submissive to those that I love. I have found that it sometimes means that I go to unhealthy extremes, but -hey- no one is perfect.
As Always
Berlin

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 8:04:07 AM

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To answer your question I was never vanilla for I have always tied up the women I was seeing. I even got my wives into enjoy being tied up so I would never know what vanilla was. I have started to see out this lifestyle more and more in 1999 after my first Divorce. ScorpioMaster

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 8:19:15 AM

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My Parents have always said I wasnt your'average lil girl when I was younger... and they always say it was my grandmothers genes (she and I were very close and she was always considered 'different' to her peers of her generations)... whether it was her genes or her wonderful infulence on me i cant say. But, when I was younger, around the age of 7 or 8, I do rememebr dreaming and having a regular fantasy (when the lights went out)of being bound, tortured, held captive by, another person, even to the point of 'release'...(not that i realised what I was doing back then, use Ones imagination...lol) I had no idea why, or what... just that it made me feel completely fabulous... I also loved pleasing people... to know I was making my parents proud, especially my gran was an amazing feeling. Maybe that is something every child feels, but I would say I did so in the extreme... wanting chores... needing to do that chore so exact and perfect, but know that I had to do so in a certain amount of time to show others how well my parents raised me... I remember actually thinking that.

As I have grown, I now see why I felt those things... and yes, I have been nilla and BDSM... but I will always say I was BDSM first.

Whether my grandmother was in BDSM (closet or not)i do not know... and never will since she has passed away when I was a young teen. But I will never forget what she told me.

quote:

You are what you are my lil angel, and no one can change that and anyone who wants to isnt worth your time. Only the ones who want to unwrap the person that others dont want to see, is worth a moment of your precious time.

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.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 8:54:19 AM

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From: Burlington, Ontario
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When I was born I smacked the doctor.

Actually during puberty and beyond, there were things that I didn't know were BDSM until I found the lifestyle about 5 years ago.

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 9:28:00 AM

Laura

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From: Ontario, Canada
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I had bondage thoughts and fantasies before I knew what it was. My Dad left a John Norman book lying around and that was how I first discovered it in print. I'd heard of BDSM but that was just 'bad' stuff. In school kids would talk about how really bad and warped those people were. So how could I be like that, I was always everyone's good girl. But I kept that John Norman book and found others and skimmed them for the parts I liked. I really realized how much I liked it when I started online about 8 years ago. That was when I let myself stop being such a straight laced good girl. For about 3 years I was an IRC slut. It was fun and liberating. Then I burnt out and here I am. :) I learned a lot being a slut. Enough to know what I want and who I am.

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RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 9:41:13 AM

perverseangelic

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I've been aware of submissive desires since I was 6.
Didn't know anyone else did that, so had plenty of vanilla interaction in dating for quite a wihle, still fanatasizing about BDSM. Even in HS when I knew "other people" did that, I didn't think any one I knew did that.

When I got to college, well, away from my home town I was free to find people who did.

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~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to Laura)

RE: Which came First Vanilla or Bdsm?? - 7/20/2004 11:32:47 AM

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I was neither. I've always been into the D/s lifestyle since birth.
I don't consider BDSM the exact same as D/s. Anyway how could anybody anyplace be into BDSM at birth?

(in reply to knees2you)

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