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Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 10:38:17 AM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
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Kind of an off tangent of SteelofUtah's thread on why people haunt this site.

Last night I was riding to band practice with a close aquaintance of mine. Now admittedly, I find this person to be a bit of a curmudgeon, but last night's conversation really hit home the dicotomy of the people I know in real life that surround me and the comfort of the cyber world, especially these boards.

He was complaining that a woman that he worked with was quitting because she was getting married and the man she was marrying didn't want her to work. In his paradigm this was a huge mistake, as he and his wife have an equal partnership. I tried to offer him another point of view, explaining to him that people do have different desires and while she may be entering into a dynamic that he abhored, others would find it enjoyable. I even went as far to tell him that I don't believe in equal partnerships and I appreciate having a partner that I can defer to.

Steadfastly, and with a closed mind, he maintained that anyone who would want a dynamic different then his own was wrong-- possibly mentally imbalanced. The more he talked the more I wished I could tell him about my life and my choices, in part to shock him into shutting up and in part out of pure rebelliousness to his point of view. However part of me also insists that I be civil and not give people more fodder for their arsenal.

In the end he finally went along with one of my many segues into another topic so we could talk about something different.

While people here may occasionally add thier "ewww, that's sick, I would never do that" opinions to these threads, I feel far more comfortable being me here then with other people. I don't feel that I have to hide anything I want to say or cloak it in hints and innuendos because of negative judgements.

Sure this community isn't utopia, but it's the best I've got right now. Hopefully with my relocation I'll get a chance to be surrounded by people more like here and less like those that surround me now.

I'll stop rambling now...

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 10:47:09 AM

lvlychaos

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Joined: 2/25/2008
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I compleatly know where you're coming from with that Idea (lol or I empathize at any rate), the people who surround me now.. wouldn't understand at all... and I'm talking college age people to.. I come from a small community where they shun anything diffrent ( anything diffrent being anything other than people who mary the oppsite sex, are white, and republican..let alone WIIWD)...I'm looking forward to moving when I can afford to live on my own and support myself.. but that isn't going to happen for the next 3-4 yrs. as this danm school eats most of my money..lol

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 10:53:07 AM

Dnomyar

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When are you going to relocate. The snow is gone now.

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 10:54:11 AM

SteelofUtah

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Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
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Agree part of the reason that I continue to come back is that I can have the discussions I perfer to have and I don't have the Bible Belt Religious crew ready to haul my ass out on a Log.

Truth be told I like having people to talk kink with.

I enjoyed doing this at munches too but here I can talk for HOURS and a Munch was only so long and then everyone went home or to the play party where I usually was invited I never cared for the play parties I like the intelectual discourse the Kinky scenes just weren't that much of a turn on to me.

I agree that this community allows me to stretch my Kinky legs and feel involved somehow.

Steel

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 10:58:33 AM

xxblushesxx

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I had fun in class today talking about HM and telling them that He's the boss in our house.
The one guy in the class looked at me and said "that's a very unusual attitude for a female these days"
I just smiled and said "He's the Captian, and I'm the first mate". *lol*

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 10:58:58 AM

OmegaG

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the projected move date is June 28th.

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Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 11:28:35 AM

abcbsex

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I was talking to a friend last night and the conversation got onto mormons, then polygamy, and I mentioned something about polyamory and when she didn't know what it was I explained it to her. As soon as she started in on the, "that's sick, how could you share someone you love, I'd never do that, gross" stuff I felt really defensive all of a sudden. I'm not polyamorous but I can understand why and how it works so I went about explaining how it's not like cheating because everyone is aware of the situation, a person isn't forced into being someone's "second", it's a very different dynamic than normal couple relationships. When I was all done my friend just had a weird expression on her face, kind of a "how do you know this" sort of thing.

that's why I love these boards. knowing and explaining about things that people would otherwise judge harshly out of ignorance.

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 11:29:50 AM

Leatherist

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You people are all a bunch of headcases.

I feel so at home!!!!!!!

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 1:30:32 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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You folks sure know a lot of people with bad manners. Shaking head.

I remember a discussion coming up with a New Zealand couple, highly Christian, over abortion. They explained they were against it because of their religious views, I said I was for it because the only person who should have power over my body was me. We heard each other's views and then went to another topic. No acrimony at all.

But I wouldn't have difficulty saying that I preferred to drop the topic rather than continue to disagree. However polygamy as applied to Mormons is not the best way to explain polyamory. Simply because those children are married forcibly at 14 years of age and given no choice nor any options. Coming from an angle of nonconsent it is hard to switch gears and think about it in terms of consensuality.

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 1:41:05 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OmegaG
While people here may occasionally add thier "ewww, that's sick, I would never do that" opinions to these threads, I feel far more comfortable being me here then with other people. I don't feel that I have to hide anything I want to say or cloak it in hints and innuendos because of

That's very great for you, but I can tell you I've gotten many many lectures of that exact tone from kinky people because I am:

poly
in an age distance relationship
young
a whore
into some "extreme kinks"
ok with educating people under 18
into age play
etc

Kinky people are no more open minded than vanillas and can be more closed minded than many.

< Message edited by LuckyAlbatross -- 4/18/2008 1:42:00 PM >

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 2:07:04 PM

phoenixinchains

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hugs hugs hugs for LA. everyone needs a place to be loved and accepted.

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 2:15:33 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: phoenixinchains
hugs hugs hugs for LA. everyone needs a place to be loved and accepted.

Thanks, and I agree :)

It's simply that the place must be that which we create for ourselves piece by piece- not to expect it to simply be there whole and intact and welcoming from the onset.

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RE: Why I like this community - 4/18/2008 3:17:27 PM

travelgman

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Any group of people will have those that are less open minded. But that doesn't negate OmegaG's statement. This particular forum does seem to be a pretty good place to discuss and talk over things and a fairly good community of people from what I have seen. Perfect No. Good Place to hang out and talk to some folks who can understand where your coming from. Yes.

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