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Finding a Domme - 10/11/2005 4:43:37 PM

kinkykittykat

Posts: 4
Joined: 9/29/2005
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My husband wants to explore his submissive side. I suggested this site because I had found the people here to be a "cut above" other BDSM sites. But he has run into Domme's that only want door matts, slaves to beat, or men to give them money. Where are all the Domme's that are patient, caring, and respectiful of limits? Someone eager to teach and help a new sub explore themselves. I am starting to believe that only the men want to teach and help new subs. If I am wrong, please let me know.

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RE: Finding a Domme - 10/11/2005 5:02:53 PM

FTopinMichigan

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Joined: 7/5/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kinkykittykat

My husband wants to explore his submissive side. I suggested this site because I had found the people here to be a "cut above" other BDSM sites. But he has run into Domme's that only want door matts, slaves to beat, or men to give them money. Where are all the Domme's that are patient, caring, and respectiful of limits? Someone eager to teach and help a new sub explore themselves. I am starting to believe that only the men want to teach and help new subs. If I am wrong, please let me know.

No offense to the married but seeking type Dommes, but I think you'll find your "husband"...being married, could be a drawback. Most of the women that I know that are very caring, seeking a connection to their sub, are single, seeking a "relationship." (Not to imply married Dommes are otherwise!)

Otherwise, what can this married man offer, BUT his services, his bottom, or his money? Perhaps he can give some time, but his commitment is to you (his wife). I enjoy a man that had me be his number one concern (or number two concern, if he has children).

Another thing that might help, is if your husband actually came here to ask the questions himself. Seriously, I think it might make a greater impression if he spoke for himself.

I wish you both the best on your journey.

(in reply to kinkykittykat)

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RE: Finding a Domme - 10/11/2005 6:04:16 PM

fastlane

Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
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I see who where's the pants in your family.

I agree with FTopin....get his subbie butt out here and asking the questions you pose.

That's the beginning of training......seeking.

Spank his ass and tell him to "Man up...or down?"

Good luck, Kevin

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RE: Finding a Domme - 10/11/2005 6:10:47 PM

MistressFire70

Posts: 378
Joined: 7/25/2004
From: North Carolina
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Pay attention to who posts on the forums and what they say. Those who take the time to post are usually on the up-and-up...and obviously, you don't want to petition someone who doesn't approve of you and your husband's activities. So, pay attention and if you find someone you like, search for other posts that they have written. If you like what they say, contact them.

Fire

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RE: Finding a Domme - 10/12/2005 12:57:41 AM

BeeQueen

Posts: 73
Joined: 9/29/2005
Status: offline

where r the carring dommes??
can tell ya
they left ............couse they got bugged by a many idiots that cant beehave,
or r too desperate to start a normal talk before they *want* to submit.
i dont care for married man, im not a second hand woman - and i guess that thought fits for a lot of other dommes i know
and i have more normal life than bdsm life - so man that only want a doll in nice clothing....dont care for them neither
and man that think beeing submissive or slave is enough reason for me to bee interessted in... i dont care neither.........and i bet ya that this last fact is what drives a lot of dommes away.

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RE: Finding a Domme - 10/12/2005 7:03:09 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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You husband has one huge hurdle: he's married.

Personally, I have to meet face-to-face any primary partner of someone who claims they want to be trained by me (I don't do casual play so I can't say "play with" here). I'm not going to set myself or my household up for a pissed off primary banging on our door sometime in the future.

My advice is for you and he to get into a face-to-face community where you can be known as a couple and then he can find people to play with who can see and hear that you are cool with it.

Without assurance from the primary partner, it is a huge risk you are asking another person to take.

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(in reply to kinkykittykat)

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