RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (Full Version)

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LaMistressa -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/2/2008 10:57:49 PM)

Yes, I am thanked for punishments as well as rewards. 



MistressFaye1 -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/2/2008 11:06:46 PM)

Yes, I do... until they can't count anymore for whatever reason.

Ms. Faye



CoasttoCoast -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/2/2008 11:25:09 PM)

being made to thank a lady for something I hate is the hottest thing.

so is being made to ask for it...



BoiJen -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 11:31:04 AM)

I do NOT thank Her for punishments. Nor will I ever thank Her for a punishment.

Now a scene, play, sex, chore, intimate time, whatever...the rewards and given the chance to give Her daily service yeah, no problem. Punishments...nope...those are thinggs She doesn't like to do. Those are the things that means I've fucked up enough for Her not to have any fun.

Then again...I think it's bullshit to bloat play into "punishment." Cuz it's not. Punishment scenes are different. But the evryday good time havin scenes are not punishments...and to call them that is someone trying to pretend it's all about the D-type...when in reality it's about them. It's like that thread a while back...where the guy wanted a "sexually selfish woman"...to fulfill his fantasy....it wasn't about her in any way...it was about his fantasy. And ...now I'm ranting. You get the point.

boi



petdave -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 12:14:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen
Now a scene, play, sex, chore, intimate time, whatever...the rewards and given the chance to give Her daily service yeah, no problem. Punishments...nope...those are thinggs She doesn't like to do. Those are the things that means I've fucked up enough for Her not to have any fun.


While i completely understand your distinction between punishment and punishment play, i don't think it rules out gratitude. i look at it in terms of thanking her for taking the time to correct me, and also for the absolution that a physical punishment implies... Once you've been punished for a wrongdoing, that wrongdoing is generally "cleared"- the guilt that you would otherwise feel is no longer needed, which is a relief in its own way.



BoiJen -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 12:38:17 PM)

who says the guilt won't be there? I still messed up Her day then. My behaviours caused Her not to get to do something She enjoys. Punishment is just the bad mean add on brother of I fucked up.



MsStarlett -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 4:49:05 PM)

Well... BoiJen, please note that I'm trying to state this as nicely as possible, you need to 'let it go'.  I'm sure this is just part of your personality and the dynamic between you and your Lady.  I don't know why you would still feel guilty after being corrected.  It's almost like the old "This is going to hurt me more than you" that parents used to say.  The 'punishment' in whatever form, spanking, being blessed out, ignored, corner time, whatever, is administered to correct a problem and to teach that person to do better in the future.  Personally, wheither I am punishing my sub, my husband, my son or my four legged dogs, once I have corrected the error, all is forgiven and life moves on.

In Punishment Play, the sub sometimes has some guilt over something that they had no control over or some deep seated guilt that just will not go away.  The Punishiment Play helps them to let go of that guilt and not beat themselves up mentally over this 'crime' that was not against their Dom/me.

Does that make sense?



submale4u2spank -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 7:52:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

Well... BoiJen, please note that I'm trying to state this as nicely as possible, you need to 'let it go'.  I'm sure this is just part of your personality and the dynamic between you and your Lady.  I don't know why you would still feel guilty after being corrected.  It's almost like the old "This is going to hurt me more than you" that parents used to say.  The 'punishment' in whatever form, spanking, being blessed out, ignored, corner time, whatever, is administered to correct a problem and to teach that person to do better in the future.  Personally, wheither I am punishing my sub, my husband, my son or my four legged dogs, once I have corrected the error, all is forgiven and life moves on.

In Punishment Play, the sub sometimes has some guilt over something that they had no control over or some deep seated guilt that just will not go away.  The Punishiment Play helps them to let go of that guilt and not beat themselves up mentally over this 'crime' that was not against their Dom/me.

Does that make sense?




Wow, that post rocked, post of the day.



malloves69 -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 8:53:31 PM)

i always thank my mistress after our get together is over [:)] i feel its a little thing but its letting her know how much i love our times together [:)] and that im not taking her for granted after the session is over i usually send her a email or 2 the day after just to let her know shes still on my mind [:)]usually buy her roses too on a average of at least once a month just because [:)] she loves that too she is a awesome woman indeed [:)] mal



DiurnalVampire -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 8:58:49 PM)

Fox and Angel both tend to thank me when we play. And for just about everything else we do together. Anything from spending time to making dinner, to going out shopping. I love hearing Thank you Mommy.
I cant say what happens with punishments, Angel has only been punished once in the 2 years I have had him, and Fox has yet to be punished.

DV



BadJezebel -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 9:17:36 PM)

Since I'm not the disciplinarian-type in general, it's rare that I "punish".   On rare occasions, in a deeper, more complex, relationship, I have.  On the other hand, I am  likely to dole out something like a couple of  faceslaps or something along those lines now and then, just because I can.  In either case,  I expect them to kiss my hands in thanks. 



PrincessKarin -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/3/2008 11:11:41 PM)

Hell, they better be thanking me for the ground I walk on and they kneel on. Thanking me after the punishment should be automatic.



MissMorrigan -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/4/2008 1:14:47 AM)

Not only for taking the time to punish you, but also for the greater good of the dynamics of the relationship. It's a cathartic experience - for both persons.
quote:

ORIGINAL: petdave
While i completely understand your distinction between punishment and punishment play, i don't think it rules out gratitude. i look at it in terms of thanking her for taking the time to correct me, and also for the absolution that a physical punishment implies... Once you've been punished for a wrongdoing, that wrongdoing is generally "cleared"- the guilt that you would otherwise feel is no longer needed, which is a relief in its own way.



chezzy71 -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/4/2008 2:55:38 AM)

I would thank the world at large for being able to wake up and spend another day with a Domina let alone one who will flog me for discretions or non-discretions for that matter.Editor's note:(The world at large is my way of saying a spiritual connection without bringing religion into it),And then more specifically,the Domina to whom i would belong to.



blackpearl81 -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/4/2008 9:16:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: submale4u2spank

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

Well... BoiJen, please note that I'm trying to state this as nicely as possible, you need to 'let it go'.  I'm sure this is just part of your personality and the dynamic between you and your Lady.  I don't know why you would still feel guilty after being corrected.  It's almost like the old "This is going to hurt me more than you" that parents used to say.  The 'punishment' in whatever form, spanking, being blessed out, ignored, corner time, whatever, is administered to correct a problem and to teach that person to do better in the future.  Personally, wheither I am punishing my sub, my husband, my son or my four legged dogs, once I have corrected the error, all is forgiven and life moves on.

In Punishment Play, the sub sometimes has some guilt over something that they had no control over or some deep seated guilt that just will not go away.  The Punishiment Play helps them to let go of that guilt and not beat themselves up mentally over this 'crime' that was not against their Dom/me.

Does that make sense?




Wow, that post rocked, post of the day.



She has a habit of doing that. She roxxors mai soxxors!

Seriously though...She is definitely among the more down to earth (read: doesn't hold astronomically high) expectations.

If I was in Tennesee, I'd be vying for Her collar & affections.

Thats just me though. :o)



MsStarlett -> RE: Thank you Mistress!?!? (5/4/2008 9:39:42 AM)

Thank you, Submale & Pearl. 

I'm really not always as 'snarky' as I sound sometimes.  I didn't want BoiJen to think I was jumping her case.  Everyone has feelings and has a ghod given right as human beings to experience life to the fullest.  I just don't see the point in wallowing in guilt.  It's not productive.  Everyone makes mistakes.  Correct it.  Learn from it.  Do better next time.



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