RE: Is it possible to not know you are a slave at heart?

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RE: Is it possible to not know you are a slave at heart? - 1/22/2006 11:28:25 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

I also played 'strong' and 'hard'. I couldn't stand myself and, frankly, neither could anyone around me. I had to consciously decide to drop the defenses and become 'soft' again. That was a v difficult thing to do.

I also, tried to push the men in my life into being more dominant. (this does not work nearly as well as one would hope!)

I agree that you should talk to her...give her some information that is not too overwhelming, and let her come to her own heart conclusion of what she is.

Yes, you can have a slaves heart and not admit it even to yourself. Not know it? I'm not really sure. I tend to doubt it though

(in reply to doubleLeo)

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RE: Is it possible to not know you are a slave at heart? - 1/22/2006 9:13:12 PM

MistressAlexaS

Posts: 78
Joined: 1/13/2006
Status: offline

Your playing mind games with this woman and its going to blow up in your face. How about instead of trying to force her into being a slave by threatening to divorce her, you both go and get some kind of counseling? If she was indeed abused as a child she's got some serious issues that you don't need to be fucking with. Why don't you do yourselves both a favor? Instead of thinking because your a Dom that makes you a qualified psychologist, take this woman and get her some help. The root of her problem may not be entirely her past alot of it maybe YOU.

~Alexa

_____________________________

Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one's own person is its ultimate reward.
Patricia Sampson

(in reply to doubleLeo)

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RE: Is it possible to not know you are a slave at heart? - 1/23/2006 10:42:49 PM

windy135

Posts: 437
Joined: 10/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: felineone

She sounds a lot like me when i was young. I too became a sort of feminist, to take control, to not let any man tell me what to do. This was mostly a protection/defensive kind of attitude. I had only known men who were not "good" who were damaging, domineering, abusive. Growing up, my only examples were of these kinds of men.
I know that she needs you to be strong, and that it is a conflict for her, to let go. it's very scary to give up the safety of controling everything. she will be looking for that weakness in character.. pushing to try to find it. I used to push to see if they would let me. they always did, and it was disapointing to me.
you don't have to speak of the S&M part of BDSM, but the M/s, or D/s might be very appealing to her.

good luck!

~feline~