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RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:17:38 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

i totally agree with phenoix. if people dont like me, i shouldnt change for them. i cant believe this profile is turning out to be a fake me, a project. its sorta like when your in college writing an essay for a scholarship, you write a story they'll believe; a story they'll enjoy. its never written about who are from the heart. unfortunatly.... i tried writing random facts about me and what i do in my life. i didnt want to just talk about this lifestyle. i really thought that talking about who i am as a person would be better than to talk about my sexual desires and fantasies i guess i was wrong..... =/

(in reply to phoenixinchains)

Post #: 61

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:21:14 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

im not fully out about my lifestyle. i only tell new people i meet. and the reason for that is b/c its NOT my lifestyle yet. ive never had a dom. i still post pictures of myself.

(in reply to Renee7852)

Post #: 62

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:22:32 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: APoinephilicLife

he respects the fact that im straight. i think he sounds like a great person.

Have you bothered to meet him? Attend one of his workshops? Listened to any of his seminars? Which part of the 'real' you came to know him as a 'friend'?

Which part of that is 'real' or 'fake'?

< Message edited by LadyPact -- 5/18/2008 9:23:58 PM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to APoinephilicLife)

Post #: 63

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:44:00 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

First off. i never expected, not once for a women to have sex with me b/c im their submissive. thats not what im after so dont act like you know me. and secondly, i know quite a lot, maybe not as much cuz i havent experienced everything, but ive researched for well over 4 years now. i know my fair share of info. but thanks for the comment anyways. -kevin-

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

Post #: 64

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:45:11 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

but btw, the reason i don't give my money is b/c there are constant scams out there and its just plain stupid to give some one your money. -kevin-

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

Post #: 65

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:46:46 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

i totally agree, i dont like talking with people unless they have pics and can prove their identity either. my pic shiould be up. when i go to edit my profile, i have 4 pics on there. im clueless as to why people cant see them. they've been approved.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 66

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:51:30 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

are you serious. first off, im far from a virgin, but thanks for the innocent comment. and secondly, i have no problem speaking and learning from people over 30. if you read my profile youll see that i stated: I am NOT looking for anything other than just friends with any men or women, (Striaght, Gay, or Bi) over the age of 30. That means no meeting up in person. Unless of course you have something to offer me. (Like Submissive Training or Teaching me about the lifestyle) shall i say it again.. (Like Submissive Training or Teaching me about the lifestyle)
This would be teaching me about the lifestyle and im more than willing to hear your thoughts. thats why i posted this topic. thanks -kevin-

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 67

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:53:19 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

thanks for the polite, non judgemental comment bloodrose.

(in reply to Bloodrose88)

Post #: 68

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 9:55:05 PM

APoinephilicLife

Posts: 28
Joined: 5/11/2008
Status: offline

ive only talked to him online. i didnt just meet him like 4 days ago. i have to plan a trip that far away. i cant just pack up and leave with work and school

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 69

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 10:44:43 PM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

i responded on your other thread but the thread seems to have been deleted so i will post here again.
i thought your new profile is still lacking in tact.The part about gays makes you seem a tad homophobic and not wanting a Domme over 30 will shut out a majority of the women on here as most are over that age range.You did have whore in there earlier and i see its not there now so that is an improvement but i think you should still remove the financial Domme statement as it is a turn off and it makes you seem cheap.

*I have no problem adding and talking with anyone. But if you are gay, don't tell me i look sexy or that you want to meet up. I have no problem with homosexuals, just as long as you keep those thoughts to yourself. I am NOT looking for anything other than just friends with any men or women, (Striaght, Gay, or Bi) over the age of 30. That means no meeting up in person. Unless of course you have something to offer me. (Like Submissive Training or Teaching me about the lifestyle)
If you are a financial Dom than you can just leave now. My money is mine. I work hard for it. I do have a cam, but i will not put on a show for anyone. Unless your my dom and we've met in person. Otherwise i only use when i am talking with other people. (It's just so they can see me

(in reply to APoinephilicLife)

Post #: 70

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 10:52:34 PM

Morsigil

Posts: 67
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

Apoinephiliclife I'm having a hard time not calling you names right now. Go to munches and get some real experience, or at the very least stand back and watch before playing the game. Right now, you're breaking all the rules and the yellow flags are affecting who picks you during draft next season. That more in your language? Stop talking to just to talk. Watch, play it safe, enjoy curiousity for it's sake and stop expecting an end result. You'll be pleasantly surprised.

More practically, don't pay anyone besides counselors and psychologist/psychiatrist to pay attention to you. P.S. you should pursue one or two, as should we all. You seem very new not only to this scene, but the internet as well. Learn the rules before you play.

< Message edited by Morsigil -- 5/18/2008 10:53:25 PM >

(in reply to BondageBarbieX)

Post #: 71

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 10:55:17 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
No photo = red flag for me. It's too easy to claim a fear of "job security" when in reality the problem is that the person is involved and cheating or is a male pretending to be female. If you're not out enough to post your picture, how are you going to be out enough to meet someone? I don't waste time on people who lack the confidence to post a face pic.

While it is fair of you to say that a photo is a must for you to interact with someone, I disagree with the balance of your post.

BDSM is not so well accepted in the mainstream population. I think it is entirely reasonable for someone to wish for privacy on a BDSM website. I think it is fair for each person to decide based on their circumstances, background and comfort zones whether or not to post a face photo on their profile.

I regularly attend BDSM events and have no problem meeting someone. Yet for now I choose to not post a clear face photo on my profile. The equivalance you suggest--that if someone does not post their photo they cannot be out enough to meet someone--does not hold.

That said, I can see room for suspicion if someone refused to share a photo even through email.

Cheers,

Sea

< Message edited by undergroundsea -- 5/18/2008 11:01:13 PM >

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 72

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:04:28 PM

Morsigil

Posts: 67
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

Are you kidding me? A clear shot of the face and a body shot are two different things in some regards, but ultimately you are proposing to this stranger that you are being honest about your physical attributes and that they should do the same. You are offering a picture of your body, supposedly without any demands to see more than that of them. What would you think of someone pursuing a relationship with you online who didn't give you some idea of their physical attributes?

Tell me that you would be entirely, one-hundred percent attracted to them without a picture, completely dismissive of their physical appearence, and I would call bullshit. Physical defects, discoloration of skin, and unhealthy behavioral patterns (I.E. Body language, lazy/glassy eyes, etc) are inherently unattractive to human beings, and if you completely ignore those facts then you need to question why you are willing to settle for someone who cannot take care of themselves, or someone who is unhealthy mentally or physically.

(in reply to undergroundsea)

Post #: 73

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:08:54 PM

Alixandria

Posts: 101
Joined: 2/27/2005
From: Edmonton, Alberta
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Morsigil

unhealthy behavioral patterns (I.E. Body language, lazy/glassy eyes, etc)

I have "lazy eye". It's a neurological medical condition (and not a particularly rare one). How do you suggest I cure that so that I cease to be "inherently unattractive to human beings"?

I'll let others talk about skin discoloration and physical defects.

Alix

(in reply to Morsigil)

Post #: 74

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:13:58 PM

Morsigil

Posts: 67
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

I keep forgetting what sort of community I'm dealing with.

You may have a lazy eye, but that isn't who YOU are. It is just one part of you. What I am saying is that he is trying to ignore it as a factor. It is a factor that is based deep in our subconcious, and we can conciously overcome it by appreciating other qualities.. You have dealt with that, I hope.

(in reply to Alixandria)

Post #: 75

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:15:57 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Morsigil

Dude, your post does not make sense to me.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to Morsigil)

Post #: 76

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:17:26 PM

Morsigil

Posts: 67
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

Why would you refuse to show your face on a world-wide website, yet be willing to meet people face to face? What, exactly, is the difference? Let me tell you: Those you meet face to face can have a direct impact on your life where as those you never meet may or may not.

(in reply to undergroundsea)

Post #: 77

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:17:57 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Morsigil
I keep forgetting what sort of community I'm dealing with.

I am not sure what you mean by this statement either.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to Morsigil)

Post #: 78

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:18:35 PM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea

I regularly attend BDSM events and have no problem meeting someone. Yet for now I choose to not post a clear face photo on my profile. The equivalance you suggest--that if someone does not post their photo they cannot be out enough to meet someone--does not hold.

That said, I can see room for suspicion if someone refused to share a photo even through email.

Cheers,

Sea

I understand and appreciate your views. I also respect your right (and anyone else) to decide what's appropriate for you. However, the fact that you're meeting people means that you're opening yourself up to the risk of being "outed" by anyone with whom you play. Sending a photo via email poses no less risk than posting it on a website and neither is more risky than meeting others face to face. You can always claim that a photo on a website was stolen and that you didn't post it, particularly if the pose and clothing are vanilla. Meeting someone in person is harder to deny if that person wanted to expose you. IMO, refusing to post a picture, while still attending munches/play parties/etc. is really only deluding one's self into a false sense of security. YMMV.

(in reply to undergroundsea)

Post #: 79

RE: Is my profile not appealing? - 5/18/2008 11:20:10 PM

Justme696

Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline

It is hard to give advise when it is human to not like all people you met. Else we would all go afther the same partner.
Some people will hate his way of writiting...some will love it.
I dislike for example how the younger generation acts and behaves...but amongst them..they seem to tolerate it.
And it won't change because I dislike it...sadly :P

_____________________________

~Been there, done that, got the t-shirt

(in reply to undergroundsea)

Post #: 80

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