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Makes me think, - 10/22/2005 8:06:56 PM   
CandyCoated4u


Posts: 3
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		I recently left an 8 year relationship. It was D/s and was wonderful.Upon my moving out of state, My Dom said to me,

"You are only a product of your last Dom/Master, do me proud"

Now I am not sure I get that, because I was taught very well, with manners and respect for Him as well as myself. Why would I still need to do him proud? We are no longer together.


Help????
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Makes me think, - 10/22/2005 8:29:16 PM   
greenie


Posts: 579
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline 		i imagine it's no different then when a parent sends his/her child out into the world on their own. They no longer live at home but they are a reflection of their up bringing.
you may never come in contact with anyone who will ever come in contact with your previous Master but you will always be a reflection of Him.
Wouldn't you want someone to say "your previous Master trained you well" rather then "your Master was a loser"?
Make Him proud!

_____________________________

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."
-- Robert DE Niro

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Makes me think, - 10/22/2005 8:51:35 PM   
JustaTop


Posts: 511
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		He wants to feel that his investement was worthwhile-it's a form of closure.

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Makes me think, - 10/22/2005 9:29:42 PM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		My last Sub was with me for several years. When she fell in love and married she married another man who was also a Dom. She told him about me and what I had taught her and how much she enjoyed our time together. He later told me that it was some of those very things that made him want her for his own; enough so that he was willing to marry her to keep her. We are all still friends and she has thanked me several times for training her and for being understanding and letting her find another man. I guess Greenie is right because I felt just like a proud father at their wedding.

_____________________________

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
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RE: Makes me think, - 10/22/2005 9:35:53 PM   
MissDiandSirHugh


Posts: 1158
Joined: 8/11/2005
From: Goondiwindi ( Qld )
Status: offline 		You are also an advertisment of him and how he has taught you to behave and in that way his name is made known as being either a good and true teacher or a waist of time for any one else to be taken into his control .
As at some time in the future your new master may let the name of your old master be know to others and to how he has trained you and in what you learnt your lessons.

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 4:08:18 AM   
Kasia


Posts: 442
Joined: 6/25/2005
From: The Coast of Adria
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CandyCoated4u

I recently left an 8 year relationship. It was D/s and was wonderful.Upon my moving out of state, My Dom said to me,

"You are only a product of your last Dom/Master, do me proud"

Now I am not sure I get that, because I was taught very well, with manners and respect for Him as well as myself. Why would I still need to do him proud? We are no longer together.


Help????

I am very proud when someone compliments me on raising my children although they are grown up and I have almost nothing to do with their lives anymore.
If I was in your shoes I would be touched - the man with whom you are no longer involved in any way still has you in mind as his pride and joy.

But if you dont feel you have to make him proud because you are no longer together, then dont. Its up to you really, and since it looks like you decided on the matter I dont see much point in discussing it.


_____________________________

I DO have profile - just lost an S somewhere along the way

Kassia

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 5:34:29 AM   
Cloudz


Posts: 836
Joined: 9/13/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CandyCoated4u

I recently left an 8 year relationship. It was D/s and was wonderful.Upon my moving out of state, My Dom said to me,

"You are only a product of your last Dom/Master, do me proud"

Now I am not sure I get that, because I was taught very well, with manners and respect for Him as well as myself. Why would I still need to do him proud? We are no longer together.


Help????

He spent 8 years in training, why wouldn't he want you to do him proud? We are the sum total of our experiences. You state you were trained with manners and respect for him, as well as yourself. Did the end of your relationship signify the end of your respect for him? It sounded like a lovely parting gift, a reminder of who you evolved into in your time with Him.

~Cloudz

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 6:42:27 AM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		That was so honorable of him to say. To me it looks as though he cherished his time training you , and wants you to be the submissive he trained you to be . A reflection of him perhaps. wow Id only hope to have a man care for me that deeply that he could say that..... lucky girl
quote:

ORIGINAL: CandyCoated4u

I recently left an 8 year relationship. It was D/s and was wonderful.Upon my moving out of state, My Dom said to me,

"You are only a product of your last Dom/Master, do me proud"

Now I am not sure I get that, because I was taught very well, with manners and respect for Him as well as myself. Why would I still need to do him proud? We are no longer together.


Help????


(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 12:30:14 PM   
happypervert


Posts: 2203
Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
Status: offline
quote:

"You are only a product of your last Dom/Master, do me proud"

I have a problem with that statement -- it implies you were nothing before him and that he took you on as a project of some sort. Others have mentioned children -- well didn't you have parents? Seems to me they deserve a lot more credit than him.

Sure, every relationship leaves it's impression on people; you probably had an influence on him as well though you'd never know it from that statement. Furthermore, that statement implies that whatever influence he has had on you will disappear once you have a new dom. He would have to be a moron to think he could have such a superficial impact on you yet your behavior until you meet a new dom reflects so much on him.

Overall, it just seems like a dumb thing to say unless he is delusional or just wants to flatter himself. It kinda makes me wonder what other, um, nuggets of wisdom he told you over 8 years or how you could tolerate it for that long. If any of that kind of bad programming stuck you could have other people laughing at him. But that's besides the point -- like you said you should do yourself proud; you're done with him.

< Message edited by happypervert -- 10/23/2005 12:35:04 PM >

_____________________________

"Get a bicycle. You will not regret it if you live." . . . Mark Twain

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 12:40:22 PM   
CandyCoated4u


Posts: 3
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		Thank you all for the response. It gives me an idea of what I was wanting to know.

(in reply to happypervert)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 2:27:54 PM   
Kinkypupper


Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline 		For what ever reason the relationship ended, They are prowd of you and your growth and they gave you the most highest compliment that was possable

_____________________________

Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 2:34:30 PM   
happypervert


Posts: 2203
Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
Status: offline 		Since replying a bit earlier I got wondering what could make someone say stuff like that, and I've got a theory. On the face of it that statement about "doing me proud" sounds like wishing you well. But I see something more insidious about it -- that when you are out being your normal charming self he wants you to *think* that he had something to do it and essentially maintain a sense in you of perceived influence by him.

Dominants should be manipulative in the sense of knowing what buttons to push to get the desired response. But this example falls into what I consider a "bad" manipulation category; that category involves the sort of fucked up logic we see here that almost sounds kinda reasonable if you don't think about it.

Anyway, credit to you for thinking about it. Good luck!

_____________________________

"Get a bicycle. You will not regret it if you live." . . . Mark Twain

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Makes me think, - 10/23/2005 2:51:43 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I disagree with most of the opions here.
I think he was covering his own butt and trying to be nice by saying....I paraphase here...Go make me proud, but get the hell out of my life.

If I were you I'd respond to him by saying...I will...and you are lucky!

Coz you can kiss my ass and I can't!

But another Dom, will surely love to have the opportunity to recieve your affection, and prior training don't mean shit!.....It's the man the moment and the situation.

Each Dom will train you as he sees fit I don't give .02 about how someone else trained you!

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to happypervert)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Makes me think, - 10/24/2005 7:15:34 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CandyCoated4u

I recently left an 8 year relationship. It was D/s and was wonderful.Upon my moving out of state, My Dom said to me,

"You are only a product of your last Dom/Master, do me proud"

Now I am not sure I get that, because I was taught very well, with manners and respect for Him as well as myself. Why would I still need to do him proud? We are no longer together.


Help????

You don't really. You have no obligation to him.

But the human condition usually keeps emotional attachments to people, even if the formal ones are long gone. I'm sure his intentions were to support you.

As well, even as a former member of his house, you still carry that mark with you and you will always be a representative of that. You can't erase history.

I have more issue with the "only a product of..." comment which is a bit over arrogant and egocentric even for my own tastes.

But you're done with him and off to make your own life, nothing to really worry over now.

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Makes me think, - 11/3/2005 1:35:17 AM   
MasterStar


Posts: 6
Joined: 11/2/2005
Status: offline 		lil 1...what your Dom/Master told u upon parting was true...u R reflecting all of the things that u have been taught over the last 8 yrs. when u venture out alone. In as much, it is the same when a parent sends their child off 2 college & says "do Me proud". It is akin 2 Bing discharged from the Army, etc. w/ an admonition from the DI 2 "kick ass & take names". It likens 2 a superior @ work sending u on a very important assignment w/ the words, "bring back the goods". Lastly, it is nearly identical 2 a director telling his cast B4 the opening curtain 2 "break a leg". It was in no way meant 2 confuse u lil 1...it was meant 2 provide u w/ the confidence that u had served your Master well, & that He was hoping that u would follow in that vein. Obviously u had been an obedient & dutiful sub/slave....in continuing 2 B 4 Another, u will still B serving Him from afar by reflecting a positive lite on what He has taught u.

(in reply to CandyCoated4u)
Profile   Post #: 15
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