You are looking .. but profile is empty?

You are looking .. but profile is empty? (Full Version)

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MidMichCowboy -> You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 4:03:09 AM)
I don't understand how people can say they are looking, but yet they don't take time to fill out their profile. Your physical description .. for a lot of people there needs to be a physical spark to set it off. While some don't like it, its a fact of life. You are not going to fool people. I am not a thin person. I'm a big guy. I'm pretty honest about it. I'm for all intents, bald. If a woman wants hair on a guy, I'm not for her. What about your interests? Why not fill them in? If something is important for you, include it. Would you want to attract someone who doesn't share that interest? Why don't you fill out your profile? Everyone complains there are not enough categories. We don't need them, There is plenty of places where you can spell out exactly what you feel and what you want. Take advantage of them. There are a lot of people who do read the profiles. Use the journal to record your feelings and experiences. Those who email just because your a male or female .. they are idiots anyway and there is nothing we can do about them. We are searching for one little nugget in a stream of pebbles .. the finer we build our filters the better chance we have of pulling in that one nugget. So why don't people fill out more information on their profiles?

mistoferin -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 4:09:47 AM)
I don't understand it either. I also don't understand those who fill out their profile, but everything they write is kink related....and nothing that tells who they are as a person. When I was looking, profiles like that didn't get a second thought on my part. I figured that if they couldn't take the time to try to convey a little about themselves they weren't very serious about finding a partner. I mean come on....you wouldn't go into a restaurant and order if the only description on the menu was "food".

pinkwind -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 4:20:03 AM)
Could be that they really are the ones doing the looking, and when they have found someone they are interested in they make first contact and tell all. Some people do as much as possible to discourage others from contacting them, and judging by some of the idiots who have made contact with me, even though i am already collared and happy, even having a filled out profile does not mean that it will be read or understood!!!

MladyHathor -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 4:28:05 AM)
Most of the time the ones with the empty profile are the ones who send Me the damn one word emails---oy I don't chat with anyone who doesn't have one completed---I know though for Me, it took many attempts to get a good description of what I wanted---I write for a living and yet when I did Mine, it was blah blah blah ( I even had one Dom write and nastily suggested I go away until I could define Myself)--it takes all kinds---just like at a party---some are loud and obnoxious, some are quiet and some just aren't memorable.

edgepassion -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 4:57:56 AM)
I’ve had them contact me wanting to know what’s wrong with me. Saying that we’re so close, why haven’t I contacted them? I look at their profile and damn near empty, no forum posts, no journal…..reckon those with pics think that should do it……sheesh....

sambamanslilgirl -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 5:08:01 AM)
most messages i receive in my bulk mail are from those who have an empty profile. some are scammers from Ghana (like the 18yr old "prince" who wanted to love me forever) or dominants with one-word "hi" or "hey" messages - those irk me the most.

DomMeinCT -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 5:24:12 AM)
I'm surprised by the number of profiles that say "I don't know what to write here. Contact me and I'll tell you more."

MadameMarque -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 5:25:20 AM)
I think those who are looking, but whose profiles are blank, are mostly of two camps: - those whose second language is English, and are just doing their best to navigate the site, and - those who view the looking as a one-way process, in which they are the shoppers, and everyone else is the product for which they're shopping. They expect everyone else to put their best foot forward and present themselves for consideration, and then those with the blank profiles come walking down the aisles window shopping. Though they may not think of their own approach this way, I really dislike the attitude it conveys.

mztresn0w -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 5:55:43 AM)
Something I would like to add and I see this alot. If they start a journal the last entry is from 2006. Wow, nothing has happened in their life since then. I spend alot of time reading profiles and journals and I just have to shake my head when I see that the last entry was from 06 or 07. I am just looking for friends so it doesn't matter to me if they are submissive/slave or dominant. They both claim they are looking and yet can't take the time to update anything. I just wonder how serious they are.

MadameMarque -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 6:14:47 AM)
Regarding journal entries on CM, I do not feel it is significant whether or not a person writes a journal there, or updates it frequently. To me, it's not an indication that "nothing's happened in their life," if someone's journal is not up-to-date, but simply that their collarme profile is not the place they chronicle that. I'm a little leary of people who write too much there, actually. I'm trying to make my own profile a little less wordy. [Mme. Marque, who hasn't typed anything right the first time, this morning ~ :P]

Alixandria -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 6:19:47 AM)
Even if I were looking, there's no way I would be keeping my journal online. I'm old-fashioned. My journal is a bound book that I write in with a fountain pen. A journal is a way to commune with oneself, not random strangers. If I were looking I'd be avoiding those who maintain their journals online for everyone to see. It's an indication that if I do get involved with that person I will be finding the ups and downs of my private relationship described there (as I see in so many cases in those online journals). Alix

MySweetSubmssive -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 6:26:25 AM)
One line I hear rather frequently from those with no narrative is that they stripped it out because they were being taken advantage of by proDommes. And I think, "Yeah, well I'm not going to take advantage of you either." If a person has nothing to say for themself in a narrative, my interest falls off. Mss

RedMagic1 -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 6:27:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Alixandria My journal is a bound book that I write in with a fountain pen. Now that's just hot.

LadyRainfire -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 7:25:38 AM)
I don't have a lot on my profile but it is filled out and I do have a picture of me there. I'm also not looking. I came to CM on the recommendation of a friend for the forums and had to fill out a profile to join. So I kept it short, sweet and speficied that I wasn't looking. And look where that got me.... grins But I did take the time to fill it out because I knew that if people wanted to get to know me, it was a quick way for them to get a "feel" for me, and then they could either chat with me on the boards or cmail me if interested. And MMC? I have a funny story for you about your profile..... You looked at my profile shortly after I joined CM and when I saw your picture on the "Who's viewing me", I about panicked and freaked, nearly deleting my account. Why? You look exactly like my doctor and I was trying to figure out how my doctor had found me on CM. After panicking for a bit, logic set in and said "hey dummy - if he's here, what does that make HIM?????" So I calmed down enough to look at your profile and realized you weren't my doctor and you were in Michigan, not Idaho. I smile and chuckle now every time I see you post or if your profile comes up! [:)]

LadyHibiscus -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 8:57:47 AM)
I actually posted a journal entry asking why folks have NOTHING in their profile, not even a preference, and heaven forfend, a picture! One man actually wrote back with an explanation that he didn't know what to write and would just answer questions. He actually DID write some decent words in there when I explained to him what we women go through as regards mail, etc. My telepsychic superpowers do NOT extend to gleaning your profile details from nonexistent pixels. (I confess that just as sad to me are the ones who have been on here for YEARS with no change in profile....)

Maya2001 -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 10:30:34 AM)
Many know they don't look the best..possibly overweight or other fault.... and the reality is most people will make a judgement first based on first appearance. ...eg put 2 presents infront of a child one large and attractively wrapped with colourful paper and big bows and the other smaller wrapped in plain kraft paper and no adornments. The child will go for the most attractive packings with higher expectations of what is in the inside....that is human nature......... the person that puts little to nothing in the profile ...wants you to see what is in the inside the packaging before you make your judgements knowing they would be passed over first for another profile with all the glitter. My first Dom was a far cry from my physical preferences being short and heavy set...had that be the first thing I would have seen I can admit I would have passed him over..heck I am human, instead revealed to me was a person full of humour and devilish wit, good cheer, a zest for life, intelligent sincerity and kindness and that became the main attraction and the physical simply did not seem all that important. compared to want he did have to offer.... I also find myself going in the opposite direction as well... if I am contacted by someone I view as ultra hot and sexy ...I will shy away asking myself what does he see in me ...thinking I won;t measure up to his expectations so reject him before he has a chance to reject me.... I know it is absolutely silly to do but for some reason I can't help myself [:)]

LadyRainfire -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 11:05:58 AM)
[;)] Ok, I feel better... Thanks, Maya!!! I thought I was the only who did that. And you're right - it's important to see beyond the physical. I had only a rough idea of what Lumus looked like when we first started talking. I discovered someone incredibly smart, intelligent, funny and sexy. And then I saw his pictures and met him...... Good thing we did it that way or I would have rejected him. winks

FullCircle -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 12:46:33 PM)
I'm surprised how a lot of people that aren't actively looking find a reason to moan about the profiles of people that are. If you aren’t looking why do you need to look at profiles and give an opinion as to why they aren’t finding anyone? I know it is one of peoples favourite topics but when will people that are supposedly happy with their lot in life learn that no one who is looking really cares about their self righteous, 'isn't my life perfect because I know how to write a profile' opinion.

MidMichCowboy -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 2:04:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyRainfire And MMC? I have a funny story for you about your profile..... You looked at my profile shortly after I joined CM and when I saw your picture on the "Who's viewing me", I about panicked and freaked, nearly deleting my account. Why? You look exactly like my doctor and I was trying to figure out how my doctor had found me on CM. After panicking for a bit, logic set in and said "hey dummy - if he's here, what does that make HIM?????" So I calmed down enough to look at your profile and realized you weren't my doctor and you were in Michigan, not Idaho. I smile and chuckle now every time I see you post or if your profile comes up! [:)] LadyRainfire Tell your doctor I'm sorry he is such an ugly fellow. Ididn't think the ugly stick could hit two people the same. :)

MidMichCowboy -> RE: You are looking .. but profile is empty? (5/27/2008 2:14:29 PM)
My feeling is, whether we are looking or not, it's suppose to be about a community. So if people don't want to use the tools that CM has given us to get to know one another that limits us as a community. I perv (or look) at a lot of profiles when I read what people post in the message boards. This helps me to get a context on who they are and the context of what they write. Is it a complete picture? No, but its the best we have in this situation. As far as looking goes, first, I would like to get to know people. To do that, I need to know more about them. I can't get to know everybody on here, so I filter it by people who give me enough information about themselves so that I may want to know more. It doesn't mean I'm going to jump in and play with everyone, but it's a good way to determine if you can be friends. An on-line community uses words and such to show who you are. If we truly want to get to know people, I believe we should use the tools.

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