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ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama

I suppose if I was to alter this piece at all, I would change the tone slightly to show more respect for the submissive's accomplishments and agency?  This promise makes it sound a bit as if the submissive must be a complete neophyte and much less intelligent and capable than I am...and I might add a line in which I promised to willingly and gracefully receive love, support and wisdom if it was needed.  "I promise that I will not pretend to be omnipotent or superhuman to hide my own vulnerability" is a vow that more dominants need to make and keep, in my opinion.

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ORIGINAL: rubberpet

It's a shame so many people who've responded seem to be cynical.  They tend to think of things like "practicality".

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ORIGINAL: pixelslave

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Original: SylvereApLeanan 
it's setting up a false ideal of Teh Perfecshun of Twue Domliness

 
I think as you pointed out later in your post that "As an ideal, it might be worth striving for".

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If the dominant is unable to follow through on these promises for whatever reason, must the relationship be disolved on those grounds?

 
I personally don't think a Dominant should be making promises they know they can't keep.  There are always emergencies and things that happen, but that shouldn't be the rule. 

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ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

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ORIGINAL: pixelslave

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Original: SylvereApLeanan 
it's setting up a false ideal of Teh Perfecshun of Twue Domliness

 
I think as you pointed out later in your post that "As an ideal, it might be worth striving for".

 
I don't think I made myself sufficiently clear.  Please allow me to attempt to correct the error. 

Of course!

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This is something to strive for only in the sense that we should all strive toward something greater than ourselves, in a spiritual sense.  However, it should not be set up as an example of what a "real twue Dominate" should be.  I can strive to live up to the teachings of Lord Krsna (or Christ, or any other mythic figure of perfection), but in reality, I am a human and I will fall far short of the mark.

I think we're in agreement here.  I constantly strive to become a better man and reach a higher plane of enlightenment, but being human, frequently fall short of the mark.

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These "rules" are completely unrealistic.  Example:  According to this, I must be in control of myself at all times.  My parents are elderly, both approaching 80 years of age.  When one or both of them dies, I will not be in control of myself.  In fact, I reserve the right to lose any semblance of control.  I don't think I should be expected to control myself in that situation, but if I'm to live up to those "promises" then I must.  I call bullshit.  Sorry.

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Expecting anyone other than Stepford Domme to live up to these "rules" is setting up the dominant for failure and the slave for disappointment and resentment when it happens.  If the Domme is at all affectionate toward her slave, then she will also experience disappointment and guilt at her own failure.  How is this, in any way, healthy?

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If the dominant is unable to follow through on these promises for whatever reason, must the relationship be disolved on those grounds?

 
I personally don't think a Dominant should be making promises they know they can't keep.  There are always emergencies and things that happen, but that shouldn't be the rule. 
 

 
Bingo.  I don't make promises I can't keep.  Therefore, I don't like the piece, think it's mostly a load of self-righteous crap, and would never make any of those promises.  If one is looking for the Harlequin Romance of BDSM, this piece qualifies.  However, I'm looking for reality in my relationships.
 
Would I put up with a slave who consistently broke promises?  No, but that doesn't mean I'd end the relationship either.  Clearly, it means we need to reexamine the promises she's making and why she's unable to follow through.  Am I asking too much of her?  Is she asking too much of herself?  Are we overestimating her abilities in some way or the demands on her time?  Are my instructions clear or is there some inconsistency leading to confusion that prevents her from upholding her end?  Is there a deeper emotional issue causing interference that needs to be addressed?
 
I don't hold anyone to a higher standard than I hold myself and I'm a perfectionist.  There are still too many variables and this piece is too simplistic to serve any real purpose. 

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And then there's the issue of the Dominant taking responsibility for every aspect of the slave's life.  Lemme think about that for a minute...no.  I have no interest in a doormat.  I have two UMs, I don't need another dependent.  I want my slave to be responsible for her own life and her own welfare.  I want her to be intelligent and competent.  I want my slave to be patient and understanding when I'm less than perfect, I want her to be wise and give me the benefit of her wisdom when I'm unable to sufficiently distance myself from a situation.  I want her to be a person first and foremost and my slave because she loves me, wants to see me happy, and knows that having her at my feet creates a situation in which I find happiness.  I want her to serve joyfully and find fulfillment in it, but I don't want to be held responsible for making her feel like a whole person.  There's a recipe for disaster if ever there was one. 
 
I don't see any of that anywhere in this piece.  

Here we're in 100% agreement!  I think I commented briefly on the subject myself.

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Reading the rest of your comments on the bit, I don't think our POVs are terribly far apart.  My biggest issue with the piece is that it states the Dominant's self is rooted in both reality and fantasy but the list of "promises" are clearly nothing but romantic fantasy.  There's nothing wrong with romantic fantasy as long as it's acknowledged for what it is and people don't hang entire relationships on it.  I see no such acknowledgement here.  That's why it sets my teeth on edge.

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ORIGINAL: pixelslave
It's seems to me that it's likely something of a romantic piece written by the Dominant to his submissive; perhaps to reassure her regarding the nature of their relationship.  I obviously can't say since I don't know the origin, but I do think it says something about their dynamic and the Dominant's ideal of the standard he wanted to set for himself at the time he wrote it.  That's why I chose to post it here for comments.
 
 - pixel
 

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ORIGINAL: DominantJenny

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ORIGINAL: pixelslave
It's seems to me that it's likely something of a romantic piece written by the Dominant to his submissive; perhaps to reassure her regarding the nature of their relationship.  I obviously can't say since I don't know the origin, but I do think it says something about their dynamic and the Dominant's ideal of the standard he wanted to set for himself at the time he wrote it.  That's why I chose to post it here for comments.
 
 - pixel
 

I think, correct me if I'm wrong, that perhaps part of the motivation in posting this was noting that we don't see much of this sort of thing on the F/m side, and that maybe it would be nice to see occasionally? Sort of a "guys need a little romance, too" thing...

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I am very much in agreement with SA.  Though the number is few (I can count it on one hand), there are people in My life that, if I lost them, the grief would be inconsolable.  I would absolutely not consider Myself "in control" if I had to endure the grief of losing them.  I can not always promise to be "in control" of My health, as I mentioned earlier.  I can not always promise to be "in control" of My finances, should for some reason I become unemployed for a long term. 

Even without such extreme circumstances, let's get down to the brass tacks of the matter.  I'm human.  I screw up.  I make mistakes.  I need My sub to understand that about Me, just like I do about him.  It doesn't mean that I don't strive to improve Myself, learn more, but it also means that it's a process, just like he is also a process.  Those expectations of perfection, can really come back to haunt a person.

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ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

Just because I was bored and had time, I did a little editing.  Naturally, it only applies to me and wouldn't work for everyone but I think it's more realistic without losing too much of the romance.

BTW, I especially liked the last line about wearing the title of Dominant with honor.

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ORIGINAL: pixelslave

Perhaps there's some of motivation of the kind you suggest DominatJenny, but I think I was posting it more from the view that as a male submissive I frequently see women here posting from the "It's all about me" perspective with little regard to the needs of the submissive.  To me, there are two sides to the coin.  What's a Dominant without a submissive?  If my "tank" isn't regularly filled as a submissive by my Dominant, it's eventually going to run dry.  What happens then?  I've been there and I can tell you.  I'll lose my motivation to serve and will walk away, ending the relationship. 
 
So yes, I need things too, including romance and to know that I'm valued for what I bring to the relationship.  To me, it's an exchange, not a one-way street.  I need security in a relationship and not be made to feel as though I'm easily replaceable simply because there are so many other male submissives out there that would like to have a Mistress to serve.  I'm unique and bring certain things to a relationship with me that the others won't necessarily have.  Contrary to what some seem to have focused on, I don't expect perfection when I don't have it to offer.  But I do expect someone to generally have their stuff together, just as I'd expect the same if the woman was vanilla that I was considering having a relationship with.  The difference is I want to be valued and appreciated for being a man who's submissive to a woman, one Dominant woman in particular who knows what to do with my submission to her.  That's something a vanilla woman won't have an appreciation for, won't value, or have the slightest clue what to do with.
 
 - pixel

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ORIGINAL: vampchick88

I like rubberpet's first post and it is correct. I do live up to a certain creed, it not something that I read in a book and feel as though I should adhere to, its only that my relationship, love, and dominance for pet allow me to show a nuturing and caring side of myself as well. I do that on my own decision because for me its the only way to have a lasting relationship, hardcore bdsm with lots of suffering in rubber for pet and afterwards me being compassionate for what he's willing to do for me. In my mind its the least I can do. Thank you pet~Lorelei