Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 3:30:09 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I can be dominated by someone whom I do not love.  But I won't feel a deep emotional attachment to that person.  I do need to have a level of affection and trust.  If I waited to fall in love before I allowed someone to dominate me I'd be a lonely person.  I don't fall in love at first sight.

I feel you're right here, and yes I do feel lonely at times, because it's such a bitch to find that one who perfectly fit the bill.
No I don't fall in love at first sight either,
but to play with 'just people' whom I like isn't satisfying for Me,
one bit.

So I was wondering how other people do that,
or if I simply look into the wrong way.

Thank you for your answer.

Warm Greetingz

GoddezzT`


< Message edited by GoddessTeaze -- 6/11/2008 3:33:35 AM >

_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 3:36:45 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

i can't and won't submit if i don't love the dominant i'm submitting to.  i tried the no love thing and it didn't work for me. 

I fully understand
where you're coming from, but it's not always easy
to find that one who wants the same or is it?

Thanks for your answer.

GoddezzT`


_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to christine1)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 3:46:47 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I didn't need love to submit, but the one I submitted to had to be someone I was dating. If a guy refused to be seen with me in public, he was not worthy of my submission. I had better things to do with my time than be treated like a married man's secret mistress. Of course now I have Sir and he loves me.

I so can relate to what you're saying there,
I feel this way with My married sub..
Although it's out in the open that he is involved in the scene
etc. I still feel like the secret in his life, and that feeling sucks.
I would want to own everything of My sub,
heart & soul.

Yep am a silly romantic, and won't ever change.
That's how I feel it should b.
Oh well it will come one day.

Thanx for your responds.

GoddezzT`



_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 3:53:17 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HizBabyGirl

I have come to the same conclusion that you have apparently. Without love and commitment it is too hollow for my taste. One cannot give of themselves to any great degree in a shallow relationship, for one thing it is not safe. The more commitment and connection there is, the deeper the level of play and the deeper the emotional growth and bond between the two.

Sooooo, I'm with you!

I understand, there are many people,
and each has their own opinion about this subject,
as it's clear in the responds, and it's good to read,
but also to hear that there are people out there
who simply feel the same.

Am not an alien afterall .


Warm Greetingz

GoddezzT`


_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to HizBabyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 11:08:31 AM   
selena123


Posts: 62
Joined: 1/26/2008
Status: offline 		I can be served with or without love. I want what I want. However, I am very much in love with my pet. And I dont think one can be a true slave without love. If it's just a serve me or submitt to me fetish then love is not needed.

(in reply to pinksugarsub)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 4:31:04 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I bottomed to him before I could submit. There's a definite difference there folks. And I needed a lot of trust, sufficient history with him to be able to know that he had good judgment, and a fair bit of emotional vulnerability. As I don't open myself up emotionally unless there's love, trust and respect for his judgment, yes love was one component needed in order for me to submit.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to pinksugarsub)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 4:53:54 PM   
cravesdom


Posts: 5219
Joined: 3/28/2008
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I agree that in order to give myself completely I do need to be in love, but to submit I do not, although it is nice to have! I do need to have trust, respect and obviously for there to be a mutual desire or attraction. I will do so much to please someone in any situation, D/s or not (that's just the way I am), but there is a level of submission that will not be reached until I am in love and am confident that he loves me as well.  

**Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself**

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 5:20:11 PM   
hiswetness


Posts: 30
Joined: 2/11/2008
Status: offline 		i dont't feel love is necessary to submit sexually, but for me to be truly owned i need to give and receive love.  Love is what makes me strive to submit even when i don't feel like it.  my true submission requires love.  Anyone can submit during a session, they are exciting and feed many sexual needs.  The hard part of submission is when i am struggling or angry....when i don't feel i am getting my way or what i want.  My love for my Daddy keeps me in my submission then.  It is what binds me to him.

(in reply to cravesdom)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 8:40:53 PM   
lostgirl83


Posts: 81
Joined: 2/8/2005
Status: offline 		I know there are a TON of people out there that would rather just have the kinky sex without the feelings attached, but personally without love and trust I just can't get into being submissive for a person. I need to have the emotions and the mental connection in order to feel comfortable and willing to give everything Ive got.

(in reply to pinksugarsub)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 8:45:16 PM   
Daddyslilpookie


Posts: 498
Joined: 3/3/2008
From: OC, California
Status: offline 		For me love has everything to do with it.

_____________________________

Princess Andie


"A Woman Loves Only Her Master"

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 9:00:32 PM   
Loveisallyouneed


Posts: 348
Joined: 2/5/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline 		Not exactly a sub but ...

... without love there is neither meaning nor purpose, only existence.

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 9:09:27 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		For me it is. For others, it isn't.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 9:15:08 PM   
daddysliloneds


Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		in order for me to 'submit' to someone, they must have my full and undivided attention, and they generally get that by being a good and well rounded individual in my eyes, someone that i look up to, that i adore, but not necessarily someone that i'm in love with; i may love them, but i have to grow to be in love with them and that doesn't happen over-night...

that's probably why i've only submitted to a select few and bottomed to all others.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/11/2008 9:15:49 PM   
completenz


Posts: 315
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline 		In our case yes without doubt.
Before we met we would have probably said 'no' Now we know the difference love can make
C & c

_____________________________

'Life is not always measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away'

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/12/2008 1:54:21 AM   
leakylee


Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline 		to basically sbmit for a scene or play there needs to be trust and respect.

to submit and there be an element of devotion or loyalty, be it dating or a loose dynamic, there has to be the aforementioned, plus a mental, phsyical and some sort or emotional attachement.

friendship is neccesary on any level, but talking surreneder loving my owner )in someway shape or form) would be a preferenece. i am an emotional creature the lack of it would be stifling, but romantic 'in love', nope i can live without it.

lee

_____________________________

I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/12/2008 2:05:15 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline 		For me Passion for anything on a deeper level is fueled by the love of that thing..whether it's my work or my play or my female and when i'm feeling passion i'm more alive..is it necessary ? absolutely not but is it better..i think so..but even that depends on many things lol

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to leakylee)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/12/2008 5:04:43 AM   
malloves69


Posts: 913
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline 		i know i love my mistress and i gladly submit to her  the times we have together are amazing and shes a awesome woman indeed  i have been with other mistresses before her and while the sessions were fun there seemed to be like something important was missing ...love my lady and i tell her everytime we are together  when she fists me that truly is amazing  so yes Ms Goddess love does make it better  assuming the position for her anyway she wants me ...mal ....just wished it was 24/7 but i take whatever time my lady gives me  good day Ms Goddess ..hugs mal

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/12/2008 5:45:38 AM   
zelia


Posts: 3
Joined: 6/12/2008
Status: offline 		I was first involved with my ex at 16, and being together as long as we were - I think it was natural for love to develop. At least on my side. He had to keep me in his mind as just being his sub, but to me he was my entire world - and so by the time we split I was very very in love.

(in reply to pinksugarsub)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/12/2008 8:28:17 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Like the song says "Whats love got to do with it"

For some of us it has everything to do with it.


_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? - 6/12/2008 2:09:10 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		For me, interested only in the Master/slave dynamic, I cannot fathom attempting it without loving the girl.  At least for me, only the love could possibly make up for what an incredible pain in the ass it can be to be a good Master.  It's easy, however, to envision progressively more and more constrained forms of D/s until there's something I would agree to do without love.

Then again, I'm a self-identified disney dom.

(in reply to califsue)
Profile   Post #: 60
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094