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male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 6:49:38 PM   
bekaness


Posts: 13
Joined: 1/22/2006
Status: offline 		Hello out there all you male subbies, this question is for you, although I must ask that other female submissives don't post flaming posts on this question pretty please ^^

I have been bekaness on this site before, always listed as submissive, never switch. I post what I am like and hoped (before I met someone) to find a dominant seeking what I could serve.

It really blew my mind how many male subs do/would message me and I don't mean just friendships. I mean long nice profiles, trying to get me to top them.

I know I am in no way fit to top or even try.

This isn't a bitchfest but just trying to understand the world around me better.

Male subbies, can you please explain to me why you would message a submissive that has it written all over their profile how submissive they are?

I mean honest reasons. I really want to know.

Thank you in advance,

~Beka
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 7:03:12 PM   
angelwithhonor


Posts: 193
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		......waits for the answer bc i wondered that to? i get it all the time, but i have had built friendships with male submissive who truly just wanted that!!!

(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 7:13:22 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Hello bekaness,
I know you don't want a bitch fest, so let me tell you what I have seen...

Many (not all) male "subs" are very self centered. 
To write to a submissive woman wanting to be topped by her is arrogant... or self centered.
There's this kind of greediness that just oozes out of them... cause they are self centered.
They are men who want what they want first ... and that is self-centered.

Now before all the wonderful subby men get their panties in a twist, I can say it's not true for all of them... I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to turn Domme after seeing the wonderfulness of some of the guys on the board (Gris, Beargonewild, pixie, polite sub, MoGA's pup, Fox, etc) and many AMAZINGLY WONDERFUL subs in real life.... My dear friend S is a sub man and we've been friends for over 20 years. 

I think you are getting emails from players or bottoms.  Law of averages... send enough emails out to enough women, SOMEBODY is bound to respond positively.  And for some of them, ANY response is a thrill for them.

But generally, it's all about them...  it's not about service or submitting... it's about bottoming...

And that's fine.  It's just self-centered.  Nothing wrong with being self-centered.

my two cents (and I know I'll get flamed), so what?

sunshine

< Message edited by sunshinemiss -- 6/13/2008 7:45:55 PM >

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to angelwithhonor)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 7:14:54 PM   
NumberSix


Posts: 1378
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline 		Ja, look you two goofs, I am a dom, but this (whether you understand it or not) is the gimmick

an exclusionary self absorbed addiction, in which you own the required parts, a numbers game, and a lotta topping from the bottom, if you actually let one of these clowns at you you would be one of the most miserable motherfuckers on earth, but you would be owned and controlled.

Ron

< Message edited by NumberSix -- 6/13/2008 7:16:25 PM >

_____________________________

"Who are you?"
"The new Number Two."
"Who is Number One?"
"You are Number Six.".
"I am not a number — I am a free man!"

Be seeing you...

(in reply to angelwithhonor)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 7:52:51 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I don't think they read profiles, simply search for females in their area and cut and paste emails to all of them.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to NumberSix)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 7:58:28 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		They often don't bother to even look for woman in their own area.

I'm a domme, but regularly get emails from subs in Egypt, US, Canada, all over Europe and the rest of the world.

It happens to all of us Beka. Just delete the emails and block the sender, but the truth is it's a never ending stream.

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 9:09:58 PM   
bashfulhuck


Posts: 119
Joined: 5/26/2008
Status: offline 		Well I can say I haven't written to any female submissives asking them to top me, or be my Domina. To me what would be the point? That would be like me trying to be a Dominant, it wouldn't work very well LOL.
Do I think I could build a friendship with a female submissive? Hell yes I could, my best friend happens to be a female with a strong submissive streak in her. I get along very well with women, and am quite open to just friendships, wether they are Dominant or submissive.
It really does suck though to hear about so called submissives out there that don't have a bloody clue.

peace and serenity,
the bashful one

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 9:17:49 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		Hi bekaness! 

I can't answer why some guys do such an, apparently, foolish thing: but, I will tell you why I might.  First, let me say that I have done pretty well here in the short time I have been around.  I have found a Mistress who has agreed to train me for several weeks.  After that... Who Knows!?!

I might have tried to contact an advertized female submissive if I was frustrated and she seemed sincerely into the scene.  I have been solicited for tribute (as a condition of  meeting).  I have waded through tons of profiles with run on sentences no punctuation no capitalization no coherence incomplete sentences...  well, you get the idea.  Note:  being that I am dyslexic, I do not include bad spelling in that list.  There are many pros out there too.  I may visit a pro to satisfy the 'need;' but, ultimately I am seeking a relationship.  Consequently,  I might, repeat might, contact a female submissive on the off chance that she might, repeat might, want to do the beating every once in a while.

I think that DesFIP is most likely correct.  sunshinemiss may me on to something too.  I figure that desperation is more true than arrogance.
Self centered sounds like a whole new thread to me.

I Hope This Helps,
Mike
SnowRanger




_____________________________

You can't help where you were born; and, you may not have much to say about where you die; but, you can and you should try to pass the days in between as a good man.
Anton Myrer Once an Eagle

(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 9:41:10 PM   
HardToTame


Posts: 205
Joined: 3/30/2008
Status: offline 		Subs fucken shit me.   I've had some contact me here, as friends.  Thats admirable.  I don't mind that.  But, some of them are more pathetic than a virgin teenager seeing his first nipple.

(in reply to SnowRanger)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 9:56:32 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

I figure that desperation is more true than arrogance.
Self centered sounds like a whole new thread to me.



Hello Mike,
Desperation... ok, I can see desperation but these guys aren't DESPERATE they are just horny.  Desperate people are too busy trying to survive to worry about getting their willies wanked. 

They are horny and think that they have the right to call submissive women liars (of course she is a domme), stupid (she won't realize that i'm just horny), unaware (she just doesn't know yet), and desperate (she wants it so badly they will be untrue to themselves).

That's arrogance... and self-centered... and cow dung.

That's just what I want from a man - to be called a stupid, unaware, desperate liar...

(and as an aside note... i was over in the mistress thread - sorry about missing you other lovely sub men in my list up above... not intentional... blows you kisses)

peace and passion,
 sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to SnowRanger)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: male submissives :) - 6/13/2008 10:01:36 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bekaness

Male subbies, can you please explain to me why you would message a submissive that has it written all over their profile how submissive they are?

I mean honest reasons. I really want to know.

Thank you in advance,

~Beka



Hi Beka,

No bashing from me because I get them as well - usually a half a dozen or so a week. The guys who write to you are probably 'not' the folks who read the forums side. Next time you get an email from a submissive, respond to it and ask him why he choose you since you are not dominant.

edited for clarity

< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 6/13/2008 10:03:36 PM >

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 12:50:17 AM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		For the record, you're not going to get the answer you seek because the male submissives who are writing you rarely read the message boards. They just spend their time writing to every woman on the boards in hopes of "scoring" with one of them.

For the most part, the ones who read the boards tend to be the ones who won't actually write you in the way you describe, so you're most likely going to get answers from people who don't understand it anymore than you do.


_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me


http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 12:50:28 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		I've gotten them.  When asked, many have said the idea of being owned by a slave was humiliating and intriguing for them.  Not sure about the horniness.  Never got that far.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 6:45:04 AM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		I have had literally hundreds of male subs write to me since I joined in October.  I had read once that there are approximately 9 male subs for every Domme in the lifestyle.  My guess is that in CM the numbers are even worse.

I truly believe that some of these men are desperate to serve.  Yes, there are players, but there are a lot of guys out there that simply want to be understood and appreciated for the gifts they can bring to a relationship.  I am sure that some would contact a sub in the hopes of being able to serve her.  There simply aren't enough lifestyle women to go around for them.


_____________________________



(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 8:11:39 AM   
bekaness


Posts: 13
Joined: 1/22/2006
Status: offline 		Thank you everyone for your replies ^^

(in reply to chamberqueen)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 8:18:43 AM   
Puppy4goodHome


Posts: 1448
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: Beachwood Ohio and a few others
Status: offline 		I have the same ? for Female Submissive why would you email a male submissive to ask them to switch or dom to you
its just something that is wrong
now on the other hand
do you open a email when you see it is from another submissive or do you just delete it
I email other submissive but i email them went i read there profile and see they may be open for friends
Not to try and change them


_____________________________

Pup on the loose better watch out

ross.g
Puppster
puppy

(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 8:22:07 AM   
Puppy4goodHome


Posts: 1448
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: Beachwood Ohio and a few others
Status: offline 		There are about 10 submissive males and female for every Domme and Dom in the lifestyle i don't like it i cant stand that there are the ones who stereo type us as being 9 for every 10  
it is not just a male but female also there are 2 of us and then there are 4 of us but there is the Domme Dom sub and slave 
It is just like saying submissive play games when you hear a Domme complain about the game players well it is the same way the other way there are allot of dommes and Dom's who are here just to play games and nothing more

quote:

ORIGINAL: chamberqueen

I have had literally hundreds of male subs write to me since I joined in October.  I had read once that there are approximately 9 male subs for every Domme in the lifestyle.  My guess is that in CM the numbers are even worse.

I truly believe that some of these men are desperate to serve.  Yes, there are players, but there are a lot of guys out there that simply want to be understood and appreciated for the gifts they can bring to a relationship.  I am sure that some would contact a sub in the hopes of being able to serve her.  There simply aren't enough lifestyle women to go around for them.



_____________________________

Pup on the loose better watch out

ross.g
Puppster
puppy

(in reply to chamberqueen)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 8:31:31 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		I get male subs trying to get me to top them all the time as well.

very strange.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to Puppy4goodHome)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 8:38:42 AM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		As a male sub, I somewhat can sympathize with your plight as quite often we get the same issues happening to us. Occasionally, I will get a message from a submissive female wanting to form a relationship with me in r/t and claiming they read my full profile which clearly states my orientation. I have no definite answer to why many male subs message any female requesting to be dominated by them, either they haven't read your profile, they just seek a quick hook up for easy sex or they believe a submissive female would dominate then anyway.
   The only time I have messaged a member from here is to coment in private regarding a post they made which caught my interest, or to pvt caht with several of the good friends I have made on this site.


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to bekaness)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: male submissives :) - 6/14/2008 8:39:09 AM   
Puppy4goodHome


Posts: 1448
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: Beachwood Ohio and a few others
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

I get male subs trying to get me to top them all the time as well.

very strange.


Some just don't respect the part that we are who we are
i bet 80% of the submissive that email you asking you to top them are just gamers and wouldnt even meet in real time so just keep you nose up and know that you are who you are and wont let anyone chang eyou from beign who you are :)

_____________________________

Pup on the loose better watch out

ross.g
Puppster
puppy

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 20
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