relocation

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slaveinphx -> relocation (7/9/2008 7:37:55 AM)
please, i have a question and search answers. my Master is having me relocate. i am very excited about it, however, i am wondering, he does not wish for me to live with him but live in an apartment on the other side of town from him. should i be concerned? is this the "norm"? any comments?

RedMagic1 -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 7:42:41 AM)
More information please. Have you met in real life? How often? Have you been to his home? How far are you relocating from people who know you? Do you have a source of income independent from your Master? .. and the million dollar question.... What concerns you about this situation enough to post this question on the board?

Maya2001 -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 7:44:13 AM)
is he married?

eyesopened -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 7:52:03 AM)
Is it a city where you have job opportunities? Is it a place you have always wanted to live in? First of all, would you want to live there even if you had no Master there? If the answer is "yes" then find a job there first and enjoy! To relocate just to be more convenient....fuck that! Considering how often relationships dissolve, if you move, you need to be happy with the move for yourself first because next week, next year, next decade, your current Master could be your ex-Master. i am relocating very very soon. i am relocating to live 24/7 with my Master. He happens to live in a city where i will actually have more employment opportunties than my present location. Should the unthinkable happen, i'll be just fine.

camille65 -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 7:56:55 AM)
I'm planning on getting my own place when I relocate for a few different reasons. I have grown to like living alone! Yes it gets lonesome sometimes but wow there is a real peace for me to be found when living by myself. I want that slice of independence and privacy. For some I think it is a good idea in case things don't work out in the relationship, that way a person isn't trapped living with someone where things have soured. At the same time I am scared spitless over the idea of moving to a city where I don't know people, where I don't know my way around but I am trying to squash that whole side of things [;)] and pretend I am totally brave!

kinkypuppy2 -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:06:44 AM)
Sounds like he is married..

Quivver -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:33:37 AM)
Nothing wrong with a relocation, but whos footing the bill? Moving is not cheap, finding a suitable place to live in a new city is not easy or cheap either. Do you have work lined up or will you be job hunting? Nilla existance demands we care for it first.....

slaveinphx -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:33:49 AM)
He is not married. And i have known him for a little over 4 yrs now, when he was here in the state that i lived, we even lived together at that time. He has wanted me to move there for a little over a year now, but only decided recently that this was the right thing to do. There are numerous job opportunities there for me, so finding work will not be a problem. It is not a place that i have dreamed of living or relocating to and would only be there to be closer to Master.

slaveinphx -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:35:58 AM)
the million dollar question..............i wanted some input from others.........i guess even though i have decided that this is the right thing to do, because Master wants to move this relationship to the next level so he said.........i don't really see it at moving to the next level except that if he is thinking that i am very much commited by moving there. think??

slaveinphx -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:37:00 AM)
i am footing the bill, he is suppling the place to live.

chamberqueen -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:39:55 AM)
I recently relocated to be closer to my Master, yet it is not a 24/7 relationship. Before I moved He drove me around the area showing me how to get the grocery stores, gas stations, medical facilities, restaurants, etc. I prefer being on my own but closer. If things were to fall apart between Him and me I would still stay. I think that if you go into it with realistic expectations that it is much easier. Try to find out in advance things like how often he is likely to visit, whether there are protocols expected of you (I always keep a bottle of my Master's favorite alcohol for Him and bottled water in the refrigerator), and whether you are expected to be "on call" at all times. Good communication always makes things easier.

NeedingMore220 -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 8:42:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveinphx the million dollar question..............i wanted some input from others.........i guess even though i have decided that this is the right thing to do, because Master wants to move this relationship to the next level so he said.........i don't really see it at moving to the next level except that if he is thinking that i am very much commited by moving there. think?? Have you talked with him about it and asked how he sees it moving to the next level? Have you asked why he doesn't want you closer? How far is 'across town' anyway? That could mean anything from 15 mins to 1 hour.

hopelessfool -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 9:05:07 AM)
Sweetheart, I know im young but i checked out your profile, as well as your owners, I can only advocate someone of your age, gainful employment is hard to find (knows so my mom tried to find a job and it was damn near impossible) You often talk about him forgetting about you, ignoring you for days and contact being limited. As well as this decision to move being something that is going to happen is going to happen is going to happen. My only advice, is make sure the move is for you not for him. And as someone else said it will make YOU happy. He is irrelivent in many cases there can be thousands of Hims... You need to do whats best for you (just my opinion from what ive read of your journal) since he forgets about it now and again. Will you have family in michigan, some place to go if it doesnt work out, if you cant get a job, if things go south with him. Cynical but truth, have money for a one way ticket back home, keep maybe most of the precious things and belongins in storage with family untill your sure the moves whats right, you can always drive back to az and pick up things or have them shipped. Just dont move life and limb, if you have a funny feeling about it working out. Personally if i was moving my life in little boxes across the country for someone it be to his home to please him better on a daily basis. Why move 10 or even a thouasnd miles, if its just going to be the same situation...

ownedgirlie -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 9:17:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveinphx the million dollar question..............i wanted some input from others.........i guess even though i have decided that this is the right thing to do, because Master wants to move this relationship to the next level so he said.........i don't really see it at moving to the next level except that if he is thinking that i am very much commited by moving there. think?? The bolded part caught my eye. I think you don't trust him enough to pack up and move just yet. As for not living with him but living closer to him, I see nothing weird or wrong about that at all. Surely you have greater access to each other if you're in the same town, than if you're halfway across the country from each other. Do you not want to be nearer to him? Have you looked into the job market yourself there to see what's available in your field? Are you independent-minded enough to establish a set of friends in a new area? Questions like those come to mind.

subsfaith -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 10:22:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveinphx please, i have a question and search answers. my Master is having me relocate. i am very excited about it, however, i am wondering, he does not wish for me to live with him but live in an apartment on the other side of town from him. should i be concerned? is this the "norm"? any comments? I see nothing wrong with this, just sounds like a personal preference to me. After two years of dating I moved to the same city as my Master, got my own house, and we continued to date for eight months before moving in together. After my move, we saw each other a couple of times a week sometimes, and other times, four or five times a week. Our rationale was we had had a LDR, we had not spent regular time together (only every other weekend at best) and we needed to get to know each other better before taking the next step. I have two children also, and they had spent very little time getting to know him, again the odd weekend, so that time was very important too. It has worked well for us. Good luck, Faith :: smiles :: Editted to add: And even after three years of dating, I realise that we still knew so little about each other until we lived together. It has been 18 months living together, are we are still learning about each other.

windchymes -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 11:14:41 AM)
Ask yourself: If I packed up and moved there under his conditions, but the relationship didn't work out for whatever reason, would I still be happy and content where I lived? Would I want to make a life for myself there whether he was in it or not? Can you picture yourself living happily and working in that place without him in that picture? I'd say, if you can truthfully and without reservations say "yes", then go for it. But if you can't clear him out of that picture, I'd keep on hesitating.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 11:32:38 AM)
The literal order of telling you to move to his city and be in an apartment on the other end of town I have no problem with. The question is- is your relationship secure enough to make that step and what does it actually entail for you both in your future? It seems that's the question you don't have the answer to and until you work on that together, no big steps should be made.

Yorkshiredom68 -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 12:15:50 PM)
so far you've only had female responses-boy do you lot over analyse everything or what? Its simple-wants cake and eat it too-that is wants you and others as well. If you are ok with that, then fine...I shall wish you well. Meanwhile should any foxy fillies wish to fox their way towards me in sunny UK do feel free....[;)]

LadyHibiscus -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 1:04:55 PM)
Sunny UK! You are so funny! [:D] I can't add any more than the other ladies have. This is YOUR life that is going to be disrupted. Is it worth it? Only you know the answer.

batshalom -> RE: relocation (7/9/2008 2:02:46 PM)
~fast reply~ His profile doesn't indicate that he is involved with you, which is of course his prerogative ... and also indicates your acceptance. ~shrug~ If you like the place where he wants you to move, and you think it's a good move, and if you would consider moving there without him, that's all good. I don't believe it's too uncommon. I rather like the separate places rather than moving in, especially if you haven't lived together before. I have grown to need my own space and independence and think it's a good judgment on his part to keep residences separated enough to still enjoy each other's company without coming boring during the time of growing closer. Men (and women) enjoy exploring and the chase, you know. Too much togetherness can be stifling. (yeah, yeah, I know not for some, but there's nothing wrong with a little distance.)

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