RE: When is groveling sexy?

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RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 11:19:59 AM

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Meh... grovelling. Never seen the appeal. I've never actually grovelled or begged for anything before. I can kind of see the appeal from the Dominant end if you're teasing a sub with something and you want them to beg you for it... but... I don't know. I think I have a bit of an embarrassment squick. The idea of begging or grovelling makes me feel kind of uncomfortable.

< Message edited by sodsta -- 7/16/2008 11:20:49 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 11:49:19 AM

MySweetSubmssive

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Then you would be precisely the person I would like to see grovel. *smiling deliciously* Yum for embarassment!

I knew a submissive man who would bawl like a calf when he could smell how aroused I was and was begging to go down. The nakedness and unfetteredness of his response both drew me and repelled me ... it was HAWT. But when people get in touch, grovelling .... ecccccch. It's hard to take seriously. It's hard not to roll my eyes and laugh.

Mss

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RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 2:04:16 PM

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Love it for the amusement, sexiness and/or humiliation. :) *bing

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RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 4:11:23 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDolly

Love it for the amusement, sexiness and/or humiliation. :) *bing

My dear MistressDolly, i could never make You grovel for me, although i concede it could be sexy.

(in reply to MistressDolly)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 4:20:03 PM

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I only enjoy it when a man is begging to buy me shoes... or sex toys... or chocolate.

Heck... There's just nothing hotter than a Gold Card member on his knees.

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RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 5:08:28 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDolly

Love it for the amusement, sexiness and/or humiliation. :) *bing

My dear MistressDolly, i could never make You grovel for me, although i concede it could be sexy.

It could be?
*slap. ANYthing I do is sexy! *wink

My lovely friend, I would grovel for you anytime. *kiss to your forehead *pat *pat

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RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 8:27:00 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MySweetSubmssive

Then you would be precisely the person I would like to see grovel. *smiling deliciously* Yum for embarassment!

I knew a submissive man who would bawl like a calf when he could smell how aroused I was and was begging to go down. The nakedness and unfetteredness of his response both drew me and repelled me ... it was HAWT. But when people get in touch, grovelling .... ecccccch. It's hard to take seriously. It's hard not to roll my eyes and laugh.

Mss

Yeah I was thinking the same thing...lol. When a guy suggests that something like begging isn't really in his nature, it makes it all the more appealing. Note that this is VERY different from someone who adopts the attitude, "Oh, well, I am a brat, so you have to spank me lots and pay all kinds of attention to get MEEEEEEEE to submit," which is a form of manipulation or trying to present some kind of "challenge" that femdoms are supposed to drool over. But honest protection of ego is very, very hot.

The responses have been great and I'm pretty much the same as the other femdoms that have chimed in. I don't like instant-submission of any kind and any sort of "instant begging" or groveling is a huge turn off. However, when it comes to honest, vulnerable, sincere, difficult-to-get-there total *begging* that is the result of real suffering and fear -- yeah, that's about as good as it gets.

I think it's pretty much a given that most femdoms are not attracted to any kind of submissive posturing during courting. EVER. I don't think I have ever met a femdom who adores the simpering, wimpy, "I am a worm," lowly-sub licking at their virtual heels, or the weird yahoo at the clubs that comes up and asks to lick your feet in a very "submissive" tone or kneels and starts behaving oddly. I think it's faily universal that we kinky ladies like men to submit as a RESULT of our influence, not just because he's submissive and we're standing there.

It seems this would be fairly obvious to submissive men who are looking to gain interest in a femdom partner, but yet many subs still turn on the groveling like a wide open faucet and let it pour until someone says "STOP THAT! It's annoying!" and shows them a better way.

Is the "build up" to what we consider "acceptable" intense surrender (pleading, desperation, shameless behavior) sort of like "foreplay"? As an analogy, of course.

Akasha

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(in reply to MySweetSubmssive)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 9:00:59 PM

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quote:

As a general rule, I don't like begging or groveling.

It kind of drop-kicks submission and dignity out the window.

The other anti-submissive aspect to it --- is as a sub -- you want the woman to do what she wants -- not what you ask her to do. (Not to say we can't ask for things.) Begging, though, is like asking on steroids.

Begging also strikes me like tripping on the dance floor or over-thinking in sports -- its overt, demonstrative, maybe contrived, unnatural -- lacking the intuitive aspects of relationship I hold in higher regard.

The only time I edge toward it is when I want/need out of bondage at a certain point. In this case its merely about physical need.

(in reply to hardbodysub)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/16/2008 9:08:56 PM

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Groveling is never sexy.

Begging is sexy in certain circumstances.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/17/2008 7:42:45 AM

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I don't beg or grovel as a general rule. I am an Alpha male in the general public and do things my way. However, if a woman with whom I have a connection, told me to beg or grovel for something...I probably would. I would never beg or grovel to a woman with whom I had never met or had no relationship and I especially would not do it in public...not for anyone. I am not into public humilation therefore I would not do it. I have to much pride for that.

(in reply to SurrenderForMe)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/17/2008 7:57:42 AM

MySweetSubmssive

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FR

One of the things that makes it acceptable is that it organically comes out of our dynamic. I like being able to flit between a conversation about anything and then falling into a puddle of D/s. It feels more genuine, perhaps because I'm getting pleasure on a number of different levels -- intellectually, perhaps emotionally, and on the D/s side. With the bawling calf, the first time he did that was after making us dinner in my kitchen and having a good conversation.

A big part of this for me is taking a reasonable, independent human being and disassembling him into something else ... something shameless, unfettered, and (yes, cloudboy) shorn of dignity. But it has to be both. It's the tension between the two.

cloudboy, you also mentioned "bad" begging. I'm not including that in this response above. That "gimme" kind of begging is almost always unpleasant.

Mss

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RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/17/2008 5:03:46 PM

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I can remember reading about people *begging* etc and thinking...

WHATEVER =L=

Be a cold day in hades before I would do....something like that...

I ate those words a few years later...things can and do...change.

Theres a time and place for *it*...

I found freedom in *it*...at certain times...

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/28/2008 12:11:40 AM

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I find that I need to update that thought. I realized that there is a time that groveling has been sexy. After I have taken someone so far down into their atavistic level that they can't see anything but me and the need to do anything to please me, I have had people grovel. That is sexy, and rare.

(in reply to SurrenderForMe)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/28/2008 6:44:45 AM

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In honor to your terminated profile, I offer the finest example of groveling ever captured on film. Alas, tho, I can only find the Spanish version.

Blues Brothers

(The intonations are great.....)

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 7/28/2008 6:46:42 AM >

(in reply to StaceyTheBitch)

RE: When is groveling sexy? - 7/28/2008 7:35:50 AM

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Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
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Hi A/all,

Well, I am going to have to re-think the first two phrases in my profile! They were intended as funny attention getters and ice breakers. Now, I see... (HMMM) I am an instant groveller!

I had to Google the word "grovel" to make sure that I understood exactly what is being discussed. The first link was to Merriam-Webster's dictionary. 1) to creep with face to the ground; 2) to lie or creep with the body prostrate (I prefer supine) in token of subservience or abasement; 3) to give oneself over to what is base or unworthy. These definitions do not seem to fit the thread.

I prefer to conduct myself with dignity; on the other hand, I love to kneel or lie before a worthy mistress in recognition of her supremacy over me. I then try to conduct myself in a manner that is worthy of her. I have yet to be asked to beg for something and it is not in my nature to otherwise do so.

I wouldn't say that grovelling is a "hard limit;" but, it is not in my nature (unless intender as a humorous opening in my profile. ;-D

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

(in reply to AAkasha)

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