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Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:20:29 AM   
sissylala


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline
i'm leaving soon to see my Dominant(s). Can anyone offer advice or words of wisdom on how to deal with the nervousness, anxiety and fear of rejection.

Thanks,
lala
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:26:27 AM   
Kyami


Posts: 32
Joined: 11/14/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline
Hold your head up high, think to yourself...I am a good person, I do not lie, and I BELIEVE in myself

As a result, you will show yourself as confident...

The nervousness, believe me, he knows it is there, and to try and hide it is futile :) It's ok to be nervous and scared...it means that you care about the outcome.

As for how to deal with rejection. It is not just he/she who must make a decision here. You must decide also :)

_____________________________

"You may be suffering; but you are suffering with love"

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:26:55 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
Well, know that they probably are anxious somewhat as well. Be sure you're anxious just because it's NEW and not because you're actually worried about your safety.

Otherwise, just go and realize it's normal. You're going to meet for a first time, don't make it more or less than it is.

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:33:38 AM   
jamesthehumanrug


Posts: 668
Joined: 10/21/2005
Status: offline
be ready, to go home, before you leave,and, be happy ;energized ,and, excited, that you are, on a doms, invite-file somewhere, and ,be more happy, and, more entusiastically ready, for the next one.
you'll make your way, up the ladder ,of doms,only , by being, at the right place, and, available ,at the right time,just do it ,and ,be...johny ,well-known ,under her ,
on the spot-
reject ,or ,not
....some one's waiting...,so GO!

_____________________________

I REMAIN RESPECTFULLY SUBMITTED
,LOVEles,
jamesthehumanrug

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:41:34 AM   
sissylala


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline
Thank you for your insight and advice. It is greatly appreciated. i never considered the other side of the coin. DOH!

Only a few more hours to go now.

lala

(in reply to jamesthehumanrug)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:53:14 AM   
Kyami


Posts: 32
Joined: 11/14/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline


I wish you the best of luck, and the best of times

_____________________________

"You may be suffering; but you are suffering with love"

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 9:59:49 AM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline
Take a good, long relaxing warm bath whit lavender to clam your nerves, as a plus side you will smell good to. Tell yourself that all will go well, and that if you do were not meant to be, it is becouse you did not fit together, not becouse there is somthing wrong whit you.

(in reply to Kyami)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 1:33:14 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline
When Master and i met for the first time, He was shaking as much as me, that coulda had something to do with customs giving him a hard time when he got off the plane, but hey *grin*...Doms are people too.
i had all kinds of anxieties before meeting him. His plane was delayed and im standing there waiting, waiting waiting, thousands of thoughts running through my mind, flashes of panic, all kindsa uncertainties. i think thats natural, afterall "fear of the unknown" is the greatest fear or mankind..look it up *grin* When he finally arrived and we embraced...all that just faded away into oblivion.

Well good luck with the meeting.

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 8:14:09 PM   
Jacques1000


Posts: 273
Joined: 10/30/2005
Status: offline

It can be very nerve-wracking and anxiety is very similar to excitation so the heightened level of awareness should make you wary, but also focused. Do tell us how it went. I trust it went well.

(in reply to slavejali)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/14/2005 9:08:00 PM   
justlkn


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/12/2005
Status: offline
I have only met a few offline from here. It goes without saying that if both parties are "REAL" both are probably just as nervous (excited) about the meeting. I have always met in a very public place. Just be yourself and do not lose site of your idealizms ..Have fun and be safe...

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/15/2005 7:59:04 AM   
Tapestry


Posts: 226
Joined: 10/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesthehumanrug

be ready, to go home, before you leave,and, be happy ;energized ,and, excited, that you are, on a doms, invite-file somewhere, and ,be more happy, and, more entusiastically ready, for the next one.
you'll make your way, up the ladder ,of doms,only , by being, at the right place, and, available ,at the right time,just do it ,and ,be...johny ,well-known ,under her ,
on the spot-
reject ,or ,not
....some one's waiting...,so GO!

ok now that's an interesting idea - new to me -
"making my way up the ladder of doms"

can you elaborate just a bit for me?


_____________________________

Tapestry

Daddy's Little Girl

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away."

www.tapestry41.blogspot.com

(in reply to jamesthehumanrug)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/15/2005 8:13:13 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14414
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
I'm confused.....your profile says "owned" but you're meeting someone new?

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Tapestry)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/21/2005 11:06:56 AM   
sissylala


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline
Thank You everyone for your thoughts, musings and advice. Yes, my profile does state that i am owned as i am. The meeting was with my Master to be.

The visit went so wonderfully that we have decided to make it permanent.

Good luck and best wishes to you all. Such a glorious ending to a lonely journey and a sweet begining for a new one.

Regards,

~lala

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/22/2005 12:50:48 AM   
Dracironsgirl


Posts: 175
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sissylala

i'm leaving soon to see my Dominant(s). Can anyone offer advice or words of wisdom on how to deal with the nervousness, anxiety and fear of rejection.

Thanks,
lala


-a couple valiums, a six pack of beer and a bottle of rum for the Master.

_____________________________

~love a Man in control~

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/22/2005 1:37:32 PM   
submissivesilk


Posts: 154
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline
The first time i met Sir in person, i had no clue really what He looked like, had not seen a picture of Him.

It was planned that i would ask to submit to Him. i was so nervous and shy i could hardly say it, and He thought i didn't want too. What a wonderful memory. Thank goodness i got over the shyness lol.


good luck

silk

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/22/2005 3:40:10 PM   
Simian


Posts: 30
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline

Well sis, I asked my potential Mistress what she would do when she meets me, just so I knew..... She answered saying an action that would be very normal mature and soothing. I then mentioned my shyness nerves and excitement, so she knows.
As for fear of rejection well that always gives me the runs... and I have no mental control over that what so ever. I do think those reactions are natural...I often use denial to temporarily avoid reality and dont think about an event until the last minute, denial can work but you still know something exciting is looming, LOL!
It is very exciting and I am sure the experience of those feelings is all just as important in the process of getting to know someone, just dont wet you pants unless of course they want you too.

much L simian

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Meeting the first time - 11/22/2005 6:18:36 PM   
veronicaofML


Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline
be yourself comes to mind.

(in reply to sissylala)
Profile   Post #: 17
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