Something to actually be scared of

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Estring -> Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 5:21:45 PM)
All you people who are scared of Aids and assorted STDs. Here is something that you really should be scared of. There are new strains of bacterias that have been spreading in hospitals and elsewhere that are resistant to most antibiotics. Drug companies are scrambling to come up with new antibiotics, but they are falling behind. These new bacterias are resistant to all but a couple of antibiotics. For now. If you are using antibacterial soap, stop it. It is useless against germs. Also if you are taking antibiotics, finish taking all the pills. Otherwise you are not killing the bacteria, just making the bacteria stronger and immune to the antibiotics. Most of all, be afraid. Be very afraid.

ModeratorThree -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 7:05:24 PM)
Today my mother in law died, 30 minutes ago I had to tell my children they had lost one of the most important people in their young lives. She had for years suffered different ailments, and would only take her medications until she felt better. Thus creating a mutated bacteria that became drug resistant, also lowering her body's ability to fight infection. She caught a respitory infection in June, after making it through cancer and two surgeries to remove the cancer and many chemo sessions she was on her way to recovery. A miracle of sorts. Upon catching a respitory ailment her immune system weakened, and she contracted Miller Fisher Syndrome, a close relative of Guillain-Barre Syndrome. Miller starts at the brain, Guillain at the feet, or so it was explained. Had her immune system not been weakened from years of not finishing medications coupled with the cancer.. she may have made it. Today is one of the saddest days I have faced, not for myself but for my children. I cannot imagine losing my grandmother and I am adult enough to understand everyone dies. I cannot even begin to imagine how my children feel. It is odd that you brought this subject up at such a time that it has a direct impact on my life. I have for years told everyone to finish their meds, even if they feel better. Just because you feel better does not mean you are "cured", what it means is that the medication is working to kill a bacteria strain. When you cut the meds short it has started to work on the infection then stopped, allowing it to build up a resistance to the medication. When it goes to the next person and they do the same thing it just makes it stronger and harder to cure/get rid of. That is why the antibiotics have been getting stronger every year and they are coming out with new ones. Trying to attack something that was easily treatable prior to the cycle of take it a few days feel better and quit. Ok, I am done. Sorry if I have bored anyone. But you should all know this IS SERIOUS, take the medication you paid for and bothered to see a doctor over. Cannot hurt anything to finish it, but in the long run it sure could be the death of you or someone you love should you not take it all. Mod3

jillwfsub4blkdom -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 7:12:51 PM)
my condolences to You in Your loss. jill

SherriA -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 7:14:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Estring There are new strains of bacterias that have been spreading in hospitals and elsewhere that are resistant to most antibiotics. Antibiotic resistant bacteria aren't new, nor are the super-resistant strains. When I was doing my degree in microbiology in the late 80's and early 90's they weren't new. That doesn't change the fact that they're serious, nor the good advice given, of course.

SherriA -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 7:16:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ModeratorThree Today my mother in law died, 30 minutes ago I had to tell my children they had lost one of the most important people in their young lives. Mod3, my sympathies to you and your family.

MastersControl -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 8:13:09 PM)
Mod3, my sympathies to you and your family.

LadyShoshin -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 8:21:23 PM)
My condolences to you and the people who loved your mother in law. Lady Shoshin

proudsub -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 8:26:09 PM)
Sorry for your loss ModeratorThree.

Estring -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/27/2004 11:47:15 PM)
I am so sorry for your loss Mod3.

topcat -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/28/2004 10:15:35 PM)
My very dear M. Trey- I am so sorry to hear of this resolution to that issue in your life, but I do take some comfort in knowing that now you face a clear challenge. A challenge that you can see for it's limits and deal with with a sense of closure, instead of an open wound. I know you are strong and wise. I know you love those babies (when you are not resisting the urge to throotle the little monsters<g>). And I know this- If those were my children, I couldn't hope for a better , stronger lady to bring them through this time in their life. I hope I'd do as good a job in making them see that death steals the uncertainty of tomorrow, but leaves us the Joy of all our yesterdays. I won't wish you luck. You don't need it. But if you need a friend, or to borrow a little strength, or just an ear and a shoulder- you know how to find me. Stay warm (that's the best thing to be)- Lawrence

baileythorne -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/28/2004 11:42:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Estring There are new strains of bacterias that have been spreading in hospitals and elsewhere that are resistant to most antibiotics. Most of all, be afraid. Be very afraid. First, Mod3, I am very sorry to hear of your loss. Very. Next, I just finished reading "Mountains Beyond Mountains: Healing the World: The Quest of Dr. Paul Farmer" which discusses his fight against tuberculosis -- which has been complicated by drug resistant strains. Very interesting reading which takes this discussion further. --bailey

Sinergy -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/29/2004 12:22:35 AM)
quote: It is odd that you brought this subject up at such a time that it has a direct impact on my life. I have for years told everyone to finish their meds, even if they feel better. Many times people are given antibiotics when they have a viral infection. This is due, predominantly, to an aspect of the human immune system. The immune system in viral fighting mode produces certain substances that lower resistance to bacterial infection, and vice versa. So the standard response for years fighting a viral infection was to perscribe antibiotics to prevent opportunistic infections. Of course, how this relates to the poor practices of use and overuse of antibiotics on farm animals is anybodies guess. Sinergy

knees2you -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/29/2004 1:02:44 AM)
[:(]Moderator3 So Sorry for Your loss~ And Estring You suprised me with this post[:D]. But then That is why we have prayer~ Sincerely, eyesofAslave[;)] quote: "No I'm not affraid of Who's behind the door~" [image]local://upfiles/19655/4B254D16BC48400A8717631451980C27.gif[/image]

MizSuz -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/29/2004 3:43:41 AM)
Sorry to hear about your mother-in-law, Mod3. My mom passed in February. Acute Interstitial Pneumonia. From the day she started feeling like she had a cold to the day we took her off life support (and she subsequently passed in about 15 minutes) = 15 days. She had just turned 63. Nothing worked. Antibiotics, steroids, nothing. She was a non smoker.

mistresscece2u -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/29/2004 9:12:03 AM)
You have my sincerest condolensces Mod 3. May you find the strength you need in this journey

sub4hire -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/29/2004 2:19:33 PM)
Chain, By now you're plenty tired of the "I'm sorries" I know how that is. I hope you have some home video's or something to share with your children as they get older. Keep her alive for them and she will always be there. Just because she cannot answer back doesn't mean she isn't still very much alive in your hearts. As you make arrangements and the hustle and bustle of the next month is happening. Don't forget to take care of yourself. If you need me, you know where to find me. The offer still stands. I seem to be saying that to you more and more. Let's hope it diminishes a bit in the coming months and years.

ModeratorThree -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/29/2004 6:13:34 PM)
Mnay thanks to all of you.. it is good to know so many really are concerned. Estring, I am sorry your thread was hijacked. Your post is very important to everyone. My dear Lawrence, you always warm my heart! Always. Gloria, I thank you again. You have been wonderful to me. I am working on a cd of pictures set to I will remember you and In the arms of the angels by Sara Mclachlan for the kids. I have pics from when they were born and thru the years for them. The local television station will air it on sunday for the kids as well. I am making several copies. So they each have one now, and one in the future as adults. I figured it best to keep back up copies for when they are older. I am also sending them to her surviveing siblings and my ex husband. The kids are taking it pretty well for the most part, they have a very strong religious faith and know she is looking down on them. And my 7 year old son said, "Mom, I know grandma is in heaven and she is happy, but it still makes my heart sad. I included the kids in flower arrangment selections. They chose the hinged casket spray that lays along the inside of the casket right next to her, we decided to go with fresh spring colors. We also did a pyramid of roses to lay at her hands 4 red roses on the bottom for the grandsons, 2 pink roses for the grandaughters and one white rose for her only son. All of the roses have ribbon attached to them with the names of each that they represent. The kids were going to originally carry them, but felt they would not be able to place them, so we had the florist do it. I will not be attending the funeral as the new wife has made it clear she does not wish me there. And I have chosen to not cause any more conflict than is needed. My ex and his family are a bit upset over this, but understand. I believe strongly in Karma.. and her day will come to answer to this. My father is taking the kids to the funeral in the morning. The ex and I decided against graveside services for the kids. So they will arrive 2 hours prior to the funeral so they have their own time to make whatever peace they can with this. And then they will be comeing back before the actual service begins. We have planned an outing for them on saturday to help ease the emotional pain from friday. Pizza and video games, followed by some light shopping. They have all decided to make matching necklaces in rememberance of her to wear. So we will be busy with that as well. Tonight they are with my parents so that they can make the early morning trip out of state, so I am going to try and relax a little and pull myself together. She was a very important person to me as well. And while I am saddened I cannot pay my final respects, I am also comfortable in the knowledge that she knew I loved her, her sister told her just before she passed that I had called and sent my love, and that is was ok to let go.. we would take care of everyone as best we could and allow her memory to live forever. The last month has been a sad one, and there is now some closure in the future. We all know it will not be easy, but at least the wondering and waiting is over. They removed her from all life support on saturday and took her home. They gave her an iv morphine drip every 15 minutes, so there were small moments that she knew she was home, and surrounded by those that loved her. Her husband and son as well as her sisters stood by her bedside the entire time.. waiting on the moments for her to open her eyes to see them there for her. I was told that before she took her last breath she opened her eyes wider than she had through the ordeal and looked around at everyone as if to acknowledge the love that surrounded her. She sighed, closed her eyes and it was over.. she drew her last breath. There was no pain, she just basically fell back into sleep. I am grateful for this, grateful that she was able to see all that loved her standing by her side to tell her we are here and we love you, and while we don't want to let you go, we are here to tell you it is ok to go now. On a side note I found it ironic that she passed at 108 her sons birthday(Jan 8), on the day of our wedding anniversary. And that she contracted her illness while attending his new wedding. And that they were supposed to leave out for Vegas on Monday for their belated honeymoon. The new wife was visably annoyed at the honeymoon not happening. And actually told me sunday night that "her" plans were still on to fly to vegas, even though his mother had been taken home to die, and the doctors made it clear she would not make it more than a couple days at best. I have always known she was selfish and self centered, but she just reinforced my thoughts. While I have no desire to ever live with my ex again, I actually feel very sorry for him at this time. Again, many thanks to all of you! Mod3

sub4hire -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/30/2004 11:41:47 AM)
Chain, It sounds like you are doing all of the right things. You know the absolute best process for closure is actual closure. It is recommended (although I've only seen it done twice in my life) when a loved on passes you actually help dress them in their last outfit. It is a way of saying goodbye. Letting them truly go. Myself though, letting go is important. I don't exactly let go. True story. For those of you who believe or don't believe. I don't know the facts I've never been dead so I really don't know what to believe. Anyway, On april 4th, 2002 my mother passed away. My sister was battling ovarian cancer. She passed the same year on July 1st. I had custody of my brothers two kids. My life was quickly turned upside down. New work schedules....etc. Added responsibility that I didn't have before. Taking custody of my ailing father...etc. I carried on as best as I could. One evening my nephew is walking the dogs and finds a kitten abandoned. She looked like she was starving to death. He brings her home..."can I keep her?" I said yes. My brother then asks him to come visit. It was the summer he was gone two weeks. Just me and the kitty. I took a few days off of work to try to regain who I was with all of the commotion. Anyway, I was lying on the sofa in my living room. Something I rarely do. The kitty at my feet lying with me. She could see up the hall. I watched her watch someone come into the room. She followed their steps until they got to the side of the sofa where I was sitting. Her eyes getting wider and wider as she freaked out. That was her first experience and she had many after that. For about the first year they were both gone. Ghost or insane kitty? If insane why is'nt she still insane? I believe that they don't leave us. If we need them they are here. Your kids grandma is going to be there to look over them. At the same time I'm a skeptic. Like I said I don't know what to believe. I've witnessed a miracle in my time. I've seen the kitty see people who clearly are not there. Dogs too for that matter. I've never been dead though so I'm just not sure. I'm the type of person who has to hold something in the palm of my hand for it to be real. Loved ones who pass. They know what they mean to us. She knows how much you cared. She is probably shaking her head with their actions banning you from the funeral. All you can do is go on with your life and try to shake it off. You;ll be ok just don't forget you need things too. Take the time you need. Get the rest you need. Stay healthy for your kids. On a side note. It is also wonderful to know we all mean so much to you as well. Your mother in law passed away and 30 minutes later you were here telling us about it. You could have been making phone calls. Instead you were here. You know we understand. I know myself I feel honored you feel that way about all of us. A second family of sorts. Ok, now back to Estrings topic at hand. Yep, it has been known for the last 20 years at the minimum antibacterial soaps were making the germs stronger. What do you think purel does? What can we do? People are'nt going to stop using them by the masses. What is the solution?

baileythorne -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/30/2004 2:37:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ModeratorThree While I have no desire to ever live with my ex again, I actually feel very sorry for him at this time. Again, many thanks to all of you! Mod3 I have not yet had to deal with the death of someone close, though, unless I go first, that day will come. Thank you for all of the ideas of ways to deal with preserving memories and ideas for closure. That has been filed away for the day I will need it. As far as your ex, it's odd how that works. I do understand why you feel sorry for him. I have a dozen or so ex partners in the BDSM community (my ex-husbands were vanilla and were many years before I found this extended family). I still love them all, value their support and friendship, but am clear that I am done as far as creating a future together. I have clebrated their marriages, birthdays, and provided a shoulder to cry on post-breakup. These are very special people in my life. It's very nice when you can preserve the parts of the relationship that do work. hugs, bailey

Estring -> RE: Something to actually be scared of (7/30/2004 4:56:20 PM)
Mod 3 there is no reason to apologize for anything. Unfortunately, your post shows the real life consequences of what I said. Take care.

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