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PoeticMotion -> BDSM and pregnancy... (8/12/2008 4:23:10 AM)
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My girlfriend/submissive is pregnant.
Now, before I get flamed, I am well aware that this is going to result in major lifestyle changes for both of us. I'm entirely prepared to take all necessary safety precautions, and will be extremely overly cautious in any circumstance that could impact our unborn, or after he/she is born.
Also, before I get flamed, we've spent many hours discussing the whole matter of pregnancy. So before someone says it, no, this was not the first or even twentieth things to cross our minds.
That being said, neither one of us are willing to entirely give up our power exchange-based relationship aspects for this. I will be overly cautious, and she has already said she will speak frankly to her OB/GYN about our activities, but I'm interested in how other members of this board have handled pregnancy in relation to a dom/sub relationship, especially medically.
Specifically (and she will consult with her OB/GYN as well, and I WILL err on the side of caution), what medical issues come up and what types of play can we/can we not engage in safely, and up to what point in her pregnancy?
We talked about this tonight and it made me think; I was prepared to give up all aspects of BDSM for the duration of her pregnancy, but she wishes that if it's possible to be completely safe, she doesn't want that.
Obviously, any sort of impact play will have to be sharply curtailed. No floggers, as if I wrapped, it could possibly inpact on her sides/front, and I'm good with a flogger, but not willing to take the risk (nor is she). I figure spanking would be OK, at least for the first couple of trimesters; same with a riding crop, along her ass/thighs/back, although lightly so as not to jar her and I'd want to make sure she was well cushioned.
Breath play is definitely out as is anything which could constrict breathing; knife play would be with no breaking of the skin. I think candlewax play would be fine on her back, but definitely not front. I'm not sure about nipple clamps; obviously bondage will have to be in fairly comfortable, non-constricting positions that I could quickly release her from if necessary, and even then, probably there will come a point where we have to cut BDSM out of our lives until after the birth. She's only at one month right now, though, so we want to know how long into the pregnancy we can do what.
I'm really going to hate putting my floggers away for the next eight months, but I'm not willing to take any chances with my unborn. Or is this a risk? I'm not sure. That's why I'm posting.
What are your thoughts as far as what we can do, what is safe to do, to what point in the pregnancy? Obviously, the OB/GYN has the final opinion, but given that we as a community know far more about BDSM than your average OB/GYN (unless we are lucky and get a kinky one), I value your input as well.
How did those who have been through this deal with it?
I thank you in advance for your help.
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